AND 


\u£ust  Strin 


' 


FAIR    HAVEN 

AND 

FOUL  STRAND 


FAIR  HAVEN 

AND 

FOUL  STRAND 


BY 

AUGUST    STRINDBERG 


NEW    YORK 
McBRIDE,    NAST    &    COMPANY 

MCMXIV 


FAIR  HAVEN  AND  FOUL 
STRAND 

THE  quarantine  doctor  was  a  man  of  five-and- 
sixty,  well-preserved,  short,  slim  and  elastic, 
with  a  military  bearing  which  recalled  the  fact 
that  he  had  served  in  the  Army  Medical  Corps. 
From  birth  he  belonged  to  the  eccentrics  who  feel 
uncomfortable  in  life  and  are  never  at  home  in  it. 
Born  in  a  mining  district,  of  well-to-do  but  stern 
parents,  he  had  no  pleasant  recollections  of  his 
childhood.  His  father  and  mother  never  spoke 
kindly,  even  when  there  was  occasion  to  do  so, 
but  always  harshly,  with  or  without  cause.  His 
mother  was  one  of  those  strange  characters  who 
get  angry  about  nothing.  Her  anger  arose  with- 
out visible  cause,  so  that  her  son  sometimes 
thought  she  was  not  right  in  her  head,  and  some- 
times that  she  was  deaf  and  could  not  hear  prop- 
erly, for  occasionally  her  response  to  an  act  of 

A 

2031413 


2      FAIR   HAYEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

kindness  was  a  box  on  the  ears.  Therefore  the 
boy  became  mistrustful  towards  people  in  general, 
for  the  only  natural  bond  which  should  have 
united  him  to  humanity  with  tenderness,  was 
broken,  and  everything  in  life  assumed  a  hostile 
appearance.  Accordingly,  though  he  did  not 
show  it,  he  was  always  in  a  posture  of  defence. 

At  school  he  had  friends,  but  since  he  did  not 
know  how  sincerely  he  wished  them  well,  he 
became  submissive,  and  made  all  kinds  of  con- 
cessions in  order  to  preserve  his  faith  in  real 
friendship.  By  so  doing  he  let  his  friends  en- 
croach so  much  that  they  oppressed  him  and 
began  to  tyrannise  over  him.  When  matters 
came  to  this  point,  he  went  his  own  way  without 
giving  any  explanations.  But  he  soon  found  a 
new  friend  with  whom  the  same  story  was 
repeated  from  beginning  to  end.  The  result  was 
that  later  in  life  he  only  sought  for  acquaintances, 
and  grew  accustomed  to  rely  only  upon  himself. 
When  he  was  confirmed,  and  felt  mature  and 
responsible  through  being  declared  ecclesiasti- 
cally of  age,  an  event  happened  which  proved  a 
turning-point  in  his  life.  He  came  home  too  late 
for  a  meal  and  his  mother  received  him  with  a 
shower  of  blows  from  a  stick.  Without  thinking, 
the  young  man  raised  his  hand,  and  gave  her  a 
box  on  the  ear.  For  a  moment  mother  and  son 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND      3 

confronted  each  other,  he  expecting  the  roof  to 
fall  in  or  that  he  would  be  struck  dead  in  some 
miraculous  way.  But  nothing  happened.  His 
mother  went  out  as  though  nothing  had  occurred, 
and  behaved  afterwards  as  though  nothing  un- 
usual had  taken  place  between  them. 

Later  on  in  life  when  this  affair  recurred  to  his 
memory,  he  wondered  what  must  have  passed 
through  her  mind.  She  had  cast  one  look  to  the 
ceiling  as  though  she  sought  there  for  something 
— an  invisible  hand  perhaps,  or  had  she  resigned 
herself  to  it,  because  she  had  at  last  seen  that  it 
was  a  well-deserved  retribution,  and  therefore 
not  called  him  to  account?  It  was  strange,  that 
in  spite  of  desperate  efforts  to  produce  pangs  of 
conscience,  he  never  felt  any  self-reproach  on  the 
subject.  It  seemed  to  have  happened  without  his 
will,  and  as  though  it  must  happen. 

Nevertheless,  it  marked  a  boundary-line  in  his 
life.  The  cord  was  cut  and  he  fell  out  in  life  alone, 
away  from  his  mother  and  domesticity.  He  felt 
as  though  he  had  been  born  without  father  and 
mother.  Both  seemed  to  him  strangers  whom  he 
would  have  found  it  most  natural  to  call  Mr  and 
Mrs  So-and-so.  At  the  University  he  at  once 
noticed  the  difference  between  his  lot  and  that  of 
his  companions.  They  had  parents,  brothers, 
and  sisters ;  there  was  an  order  and  succession  in 


4      FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

their  life.  They  had  relations  to  their  fellow-men 
and  obeyed  secret  social  laws.  They  felt  instinc- 
tively that  he  did  not  belong  to  their  fold. 

When  as  a  young  doctor  he  acted  on  behalf  of 
an  army  medical  officer  for  some  time,  he  felt  at 
once  that  he  was  not  in  his  proper  place,  and  so 
did  the  officers.  The  silent  resistance  which  he 
offered  from  the  first  to  their  imperiousness  and 
arbitrary  ways  marked  him  out  as  a  dissatisfied 
critic,  and  he  was  left  to  himself. 

In  the  hospital  it  was  the  same.  Here  he  per- 
ceived at  once  the  fateful  predestination  of  social 
election,  those  who  were  called  and  those  who 
were  not  called.  It  seemed  as  though  the 
authorities  could  discern  by  scent  those  who  were 
congenial  to  them.  And  so  it  was  everywhere. 
He  started  a  practice  as  a  ladies'  doctor,  but  had 
no  luck,  for  he  demanded  straightforward  answers 
to  his  questions,  and  those  he  never  received. 
Then  he  became  impatient,  and  was  considered 
brutal.  He  became  a  Government  sanitary 
officer  in  a  remote  part  of  the  country,  and  since 
he  was  now  independent  of  his  patients'  favour, 
he  troubled  himself  still  less  about  pleasing  them. 
Presently  he  was  transferred  to  the  quarantine 
service,  and  was  finally  stationed  at  Skamsund. 

When  he  had  come  here,  now  seventeen  years 
ago,  he  at  once  began  to  be  at  variance  with  the 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND      6 

pilots,  who,  as  the  only  authorities  on  the  island, 
indulged  themselves  in  many  acts  of  arbitrariness 
towards  the  inhabitants.  The  quarantine  doctor 
loved  peace  and  quietness  like  other  men,  but  he 
had  early  learnt  that  warfare  is  necessary;  and 
that  it  is  no  use  simply  to  be  passive  as  regards 
one's  rights,  but  that  one  must  defend  them  every 
day  and  every  hour  of  the  day.  Since  he  was  a 
new-comer  they  tried  to  curtail  his  authority  and 
deprive  him  of  his  small  privileges.  The  chief 
pilot  had  a  prescriptive  right  to  half  the  land,  but 
the  quarantine  doctor  had  in  his  bay  a  small 
promontory  where  the  pilots  used  to  moor  their 
private  boats  and  store  their  fishing  implements. 
The  doctor  first  ascertained  his  legal  rights  in  the 
matter,  and  when  he  found  out  that  he  had  the 
sole  right  of  using  the  promontory  and  that  the 
pilots  could  store  their  fishing-tackle  elsewhere,  he 
went  to  the  chief  pilot  and  gave  them  a  friendly 
notice  to  quit.  When  he  saw  that  mere  polite- 
ness was  of  no  avail,  he  took  stronger  measures, 
had  the  place  cleared  and  fenced  off  by  I-!* 
servants,  turned  it  into  a  garden,  and  erected  a 
simple  pavilion  in  it.  The  pilots  hailed  petitions 
on  the  Government,  but  the  matter  was  decided 
in  his  favour.  The  result  was  a  lifelong  enmity 
between  him  and  the  pilots.  The  quarantine 
doctor  was  shut  in  on  his  promontory  and  him- 


6      FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

self  placed  in  quarantine.  There  he  had  now 
remained  for  seventeen  years,  but  not  in  peace, 
for  there  was  always  strife.  Either  his  dog  fought 
with  the  pilots'  dog,  or  their  fowls  came  into  his 
garden,  or  they  ran  their  boats  ashore  on  each 
other's  ground.  Thus  he  was  kept  in  a  continual 
state  of  anger  and  excitement,  and  even  if  there 
ever  was  quiet  for  a  moment  outside  the  house, 
inside  there  was  the  housekeeper.  They  had 
quarrelled  for  seventeen  years,  and  once  every 
week  she  had  packed  her  things  in  order  to  go. 
She  was  a  tyrant  and  insisted  that  her  master 
should  have  sugar  in  all  his  sauces,  even  with 
fresh  cod.  During  all  the  seventeen  years  she 
had  not  learnt  how  to  boil  an  egg  but  wished  the 
doctor  to  learn  to  eat  half -raw  eggs,  which  he 
hated.  Sometimes  he  got  tired  of  quarrelling, 
and  then  everything  went  on  in  Kristin's  old  way. 
He  would  eat  raw  potatoes,  stale  bread,  sour 
cream  and  such-like  for  a  whole  week  and  admire 
himself  as  a  Socrates ;  then  his  self-respect  awoke 
and  he  began  to  storm  again.  He  had  to  storm 
in  order  to  get  the  salt-cellar  placed  on  the  table, 
to  get  the  doors  shut,  to  get  the  lamps  filled  with 
oil.  The  lamp-chimneys  and  wicks  he  had  to 
clean  himself,  for  that  she  could  not  learn. 

1  You  are  a  cow,  Kristin !    You  are  a  wretch 
who  cannot  value  kindness.    Do  you  like  me  to 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STEAND      7 

storm?  Do  you  know  that  I  abominate  myself 
when  I  am  obliged  to  get  so  excited.  You  make 
me  bad,  and  you  are  a  poisonous  worm.  I  wish 
you  had  never  been  born,  and  lay  in  the  depths  of 
the  earth.  You  are  not  a  human  being  for  you 
cannot  learn ;  you  are  a  cow,  that  you  are !  You 
will  go?  Yes,  go  to  the  deuce,  where  you  came 
from!" 

But  Kristin  never  went.  Once  indeed  she  got 
as  far  as  the  steamer  bridge,  but  turned  round 
and  entered  the  wood,  whence  the  doctor  had  to 
fetch  her  home. 

The  doctor's  only  acquaintance  was  the  post- 
master at  Fagervik,  an  old  comrade  of  his  student 
days,  who  came  over  every  Saturday  evening. 
Then  the  two  drank  and  gossiped  till  past  mid- 
night and  the  postmaster  remained  till  Sunday 
morning.  They  certainly  did  not  look  at  life  and 
their  fellow-men  from  the  same  point  of  view,  for 
the  postmaster  was  a  decided  member  of  the  Left 
Party,  and  the  doctor  was  a  sceptic,  but  their 
talk  suited  each  other  so  well,  that  their  con- 
versation was  like  a  part-song,  or  piece  of  music, 
for  two  voices,  in  which  the  voices,  although 
varying,  yet  formed  a  harmony.  The  doctor,  with 
his  wider  mental  outlook,  sometimes  expressed 
disapproval  of  his  companion's  sentiments  some- 
what as  follows : 


8      FAIR   HAYEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

'  You  party-men  are  like  one-eyed  cats.  Some 
see  only  with  the  left  eye,  others  with  the  right, 
and  therefore  you  can  never  see  stereoscopically, 
but  always  flat  and  one-sidedly." 

They  were  both  great  newspaper  readers  and 
followed  the  course  of  all  questions  with  eager- 
ness. The  most  burning  question,  however, 
was  the  religious  one,  for  the  political  ones  were 
settled  by  votes  in  the  Reichstag  and  came  to  an 
end,  but  the  religious  questions  never  ended. 
The  postmaster  hated  pietists  and  temperance 
advocates. 

'  Why  the  deuce  do  you  hate  the  pietists  ? ' ' 
the  doctor  would  say.  '  What  harm  have  they 
done  you?  Let  them  enjoy  themselves;  it  doesn't 
affect  me." 

'  They  are  all  hypocrites,"  said  the  postmaster 
dogmatically. 

"No,"  answered  the  doctor,  'you  cannot 
judge,  for  you  have  never  been  a  pietist,  but  I 
have,  and  I  was — deuce  take  me — no  hypocrite. 
But  I  don't  do  it  again.  That  is  to  say — one 
never  knows,  for  it  comes  over  one,  or  does  not — 
it  all  depends  on " 

"On  what?" 

"  Hard  to  say.  Pietism,  for  the  rest,  is  a  kind 
of  European  Buddhism.  Both  regard  the  world 
as  an  unclean  place  of  punishment  for  the  soul. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND      9 

Therefore  they  seek  to  counteract  material 
influences,  and  in  that  they  are  not  so  wrong. 
That  they  do  not  succeed  is  obvious,  but  the 
struggle  itself  deserves  respect.  Their  apparent 
hypocrisy  results  from  the  fact  that  they  do  not 
reach  the  goal  they  aim  at,  and  their  life  always 
halts  behind  their  teaching.  That  the  priests  of 
the  church  hate  them  is  clear,  for  our  married 
dairy  farmers,  card  players  and  good  diners  do 
not  love  these  apostles  who  show  their  unneces- 
sariness  and  their  defects.  You  know  our  clergy 
out  there  on  the  islands ;  I  need  not  gossip  about 
them,  for  you  know.  There  you  have  the  hypo- 
crites, especially  among  the  unfortunates,  who 
after  going  through  their  examination  have  lost 
faith  in  all  doctrines." 

'  Yes,  but  the  pietists  are  enemies  to  culture." 
"  No,  I  don't  find  that.  When  I  came  to  this 
island  it  was  inhabited  by  three  hundred  besotted 
beasts  who  led  the  life  of  devils.  And  now — you 
see  for  yourself.  They  are  not  lovable  nor  lively, 
but  they  are,  at  any  rate,  quiet,  so  that  one  can 
sleep  at  night;  and  they  don't  fight,  so  that  one 
can  walk  about  the  island  without  fear  for  one's 
life  and  limbs.  In  a  word,  the  simplest  blessings 
of  civilisation  were  the  distinct  result  of  the  erec- 
tion of  the  prayer-house." 

"  The  prayer-house  which  you  never  enter !  ' 


10    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

"  No,  I  don't  belong  to  that  fold.  But  have 
you  ever  been  there?  " 

"I?    No!  " 
'  You  should  hear  them  once  at  any  rate." 

"Why?" 

"You  daren't!  " 

"  Daren't!    Is  it  dangerous?  ' 

"So  they  say!  " 

"Not  for  me." 

"  Shall  we  wager  a  barrel  of  punch?  ' 

The  postmaster  reflected  an  instant,  not  so 
much  on  the  punch  as  on  the  doctor's  suspecting 
him  of  cowardice. 

"  Done !  I  will  go  there  on  Friday.  And  you 
can  carry  the  punch  home  in  a  boat,  if  you  see 
anything  go  wrong  with  me." 

The  day  came  and  the  postmaster  ate  his  dinner 
with  the  doctor,  before  he  took  his  way,  as  agreed, 
to  the  prayer-house.  He  had  told  no  one  of  his 
intention,  partly  because  he  feared  that  the 
preacher  might  aim  at  him,  partly  because  he  did 
not  wish  to  get  the  reputation  of  being  a  pietist. 
After  dinner  he  borrowed  a  box  of  snuff  to  keep 
himself  awake,  in  spite  of  the  doctor's  assurance 
that  he  would  not  have  any  chance  of  sleeping. 
And  so  he  went. 

The  doctor  walked  about  his  garden  waiting 
for  the  result  of  the  experiment  to  which  many 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND    11 

a  stronger  man  than  the  postmaster  had  suc- 
cumbed. He  waited  for  an  hour  and  a  half;  he 
waited  two  hours;  he  waited  three.  Then  at  last 
he  saw  the  congregation  coming  out — a  sign  that 
it  was  over.  But  the  postmaster  did  not  appear. 
The  doctor  became  uneasy.  Another  hour  passed, 
and  at  last  he  saw  his  friend  coming  out  of  the 
wood.  He  came  with  a  somewhat  artificial  liveli- 
ness and  there  was  something  forced  in  the 
springiness  of  his  gait.  When  he  saw  the  doctor, 
he  made  a  slight  wriggling  movement  with  his 
legs,  and  shrugged  his  shoulders  as  though  his 
clothes  were  too  tight  for  him. 

"  Well?  "  asked  the  doctor.  "  It  was  tedious, 
wasn't  it?  " 

"  Yes,"  was  the  only  answer. 

They  went  down  to  the  pavilion  and  took  their 
seats  opposite  each  other,  although  the  post- 
master was  shy  of  showing  his  face,  into  which  a 
new  expression  had  come. 

"  Give  me  a  pinch  of  snuff,"  said  the  doctor 
slyly. 

The  postmaster  drew  out  the  snuff-box,  which 
had  been  untouched. 

"  You  did  not  sleep?  "  resumed  the  doctor. 

The  postmaster  felt  embarrassed. 
'  Well,  old  fellow,  you  are  not  cheerful !  What 
is  the  matter  ?     Stop  a  minute !  '      The  doctor 


12    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

indicated  with  his  forefinger  the  space  between 
his  friend's  eyes  and  nose  as  though  he  wished 
to  show  him  something,  "  I  believe  .  .  .  you 
have  been  crying !  ' 

' '  Nonsense !  ' '  answered  the  postmaster,  and 
straightened  himself  up.  "  But,  at  any  rate,  you 
know  I  am  not  easily  befooled,  but  as  I  said  that 
fellow  is  a  wizard." 

"  Tell  us,  tell  us!  Fancy  your  believing  in 
wizards ! ' : 

"Yes,  it  was  so  strange."  He  paused  for  a 
while  and  continued : 

"  Can  you  imagine  it?  He  preached,  as  was 
to  be  expected,  especially  to  me.  And  in  the 
middle  of  his  preaching  he  told  me  all  the  secrets 
which,  like  everyone  else,  I  have  kept  most 
jealously  hidden  from  my  childhood's  days  and 
earlier.  I  felt  that  I  reddened,  and  that  the  whole 
congregation  looked  at  me  as  "though  they  knew 
it  also,  which  is  quite  impossible.  They  nodded, 
keeping  time  with  his  words  and  looking  at  me 
simultaneously.  Yes,  they  turned  round  on 
their  seats.  Even  regarded  as  witchcraft  it 
was " 

"Yes,  yes,  I  know  it,  and  therefore  I  take 
care.  What  it  is  I  don't  know,  but  it  is  something 
which  I  keep  at  arm's  length.  And  it  is  the  same 
with  Swedenborg.  I  sat  once  in  an  ante-room 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STBAND     13 

waiting  for  admission.  Behind  me  stood  a  book- 
case from  which  a  book  projected  and  prevented 
me  from  leaning  my  head  back.  I  took  the  book 
down  and  it  was  part  of  Swedenborg's  '  Arcana 
Coelestia.'  I  opened  it  at  random  and — can  you 
imagine  it?  in  two  minutes  a  subject  which  just 
then  occupied  my  thoughts  was  explained  to  me  in 
such  detail  and  with  an  almost  alarming  amount 
of  expert  knowledge,  that  it  was  quite  uncanny. 
In  two  minutes  I  was  quite  clear  regarding  myself 
and  my  concerns." 

"Well,  tell  us  about  it." 
'  No,  I  won't.    You  know  yourself  that  the  life 
we  live  in  thought  is  secret,  and  what  we  experi- 
ence in  secret.   .   .   .  Yes,  we  are  not  what  we 
seem." 

"No."  His  friend  broke  in  hastily.  "No; 
our  actions  are  very  easy  to  control,  but  our 
thoughts  .  .  .  ugh !  r 

:<  And  thoughts  are  the  deeds  of  the  mind,  as 
I  have  read  somewhere.  With  our  silent,  evil 
thoughts  we  can  infect  others;  we  can  transfer 
our  evil  purposes  to  others  who  execute  them. 
Do  you  remember  the  case  of  the  child  murderess 
here  ten  years  ago?  ): 

"  No,  I  was  away  then." 

"  She  was  a  young  children's  nurse,  innocent, 
fond  of  children,  and  had  always  been  kind,  as 


14    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

was  elicited  in  examination.  During  the  summer 
she  was  in  the  service  of  an  actress  up  there  in 
Fagervik.  In  August  she  was  arrested  for  child 
murder.  I  was  present  in  court  when  she  was 
examined.  She  could  not  assign  any  reason  for 
her  action.  But  the  judge  wished  to  find  out  the 
reason,  since  she  had  no  personal  motive  for  it. 
The  witnesses  declared  that  she  had  loved  the 
child,  and  she  admitted  it.  At  her  second 
examination  she  was  beside  herself  with  remorse 
and  horror  at  the  terrible  deed,  but  still  behaved 
as  though  she  were  not  really  guilty,  although  she 
assumed  the  responsibility  for  the  crime.  At  the 
third  examination  the  judge  tried  to  help  her, 
and  put  the  question,  '  How  did  the  idea  come  to 
you  of  murdering  an  innocent  child  whom  you 
loved  ?  Think  carefully  ! '  The  girl  cast  a  look  of 
despair  round  the  court,  but  when  her  eyes  rested 
on  the  mother  of  the  child,  the  actress,  who  was 
present  for  the  first  time,  she  answered  the  judge 
simply  and  naturally.  '  I  believe  that  my  mis- 
tress wished  it.'  You  should  have  seen  the 
woman's  face  as  these  words  were  uttered.  It 
seemed  to  me  that  her  clothes  dropped  from  her 
and  she  stood  there  exposed,  and  foi  the  first 
time  I  thought  of  the  abysmal  depths  of  the 
human  soul,  over  which  a  judge  must  walk  writh 
bandaged  eyes,  for  he  has  no  right  to  punish  us 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND     15 

in  our  interior  life  of  thought;  there  we  punish 
ourselves  and  that  is  what  the  pietists  do." 

"  What  you  say  is  true  enough,  but  I  know 
also  that  my  inner  life  is  sometimes  higher  and 
purer  than  my  outward  life." 

"  I  grant  it.  I  have  also  an  idea  of  my  better 
ego,  which  is  the  best  I  know.  .  .  .  But  tell  me, 
what  have  you  been  doing  for  a  whole  hour  in 
the  wood?" 

"  I  was  thinking." 

'  You  are  not  going  to  be  a  pietist,  I  sup- 
pose," broke  in  the  doctor  as  he  filled  his  glass. 

"No,  not  I." 

' '  But  you  no  longer  think  the  pietists  are 
humbugs?  '' 

To  this  the  postmaster  made  no  reply.  But 
the  drinking  did  not  go  briskly  that  evening,  and 
the  conversation  was  on  higher  topics  than  usual. 
Towards  ten  o'clock  a  terrible  howling  like  that 
of  wild  beasts  came  over  the  Sound.  It  was  from 
the  garden  of  the  hotel  in  Fagervik.  Both  the 
philosophers  glanced  in  that  direction. 

'  They  are  the  crews  of  the  cutters,  of 
course,"  said  the  postmaster.  "  They  are  cer- 
tainly fighting  too.  Yes,  Fagervik  is  going  down 
because  of  the  rows  at  night.  The  holiday  visitors 
run  away  for  they  cannot  sleep,  and  they  have 
thought  of  closing  the  beer-shops." 


16    FAIR   HATEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

"And  of  opening  a  prayer-house,  perhaps?  ' 

This  question  also  remained  unanswered,  and 
they  parted  without  knowing  exactly  how  they 
stood  with  each  other. 

Meanwhile  the  report  spread  in  Fagervik  that 
the  postmaster  had  been  to  the  prayer-house, 
and  when  the  next  afternoon  he  found  himself 
in  his  little  circle  at  the  hotel  with  the  custom- 
house officer  and  the  chief  pilot,  they  greeted  him 
with  the  important  news : 

'  So  !  you  have  become  a  pietist !  ' 

The  postmaster  parried  the  thrust  with  a  jest, 
swore  emphatically  that  it  was  untrue,  and  as  a 
proof  emptied  his  glass  more  thoroughly  than 
usual. 

"  But  you  have  been  there." 

"  I  was  curious." 

"Well,  what  did  they  say?  " 

The  postmaster's  face  darkened,  and  as  they 
continued  to  jest  it  occurred  to  him  that  it  was 
cowardly  and  contemptible  to  mock  at  what  in 
his  opinion  did  not  deserve  mockery.  Therefore 
he  said  seriously  and  decidedly  :  ' '  Leave  me  in 
peace !  I  am  not  a  pietist,  but  I  think  highly  of 
them." 

That  was  tantamount  to  a  confession,  and  like 
an  iron  curtain  something  fell  between  him 
and  his  friends.  The  expression  of  their  faces 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND     17 

changed,  and  they  seemed  all  at  once  strange  to 
him.  It  was  the  most  curious  experience  he  had 
had,  and  it  was  painful  at  the  same  time. 

He  kept  away  for  a  few  days  and  seemed  to  be 
in  an  introspective  mood.  After  that,  by  degrees, 
he  resumed  his  old  relations  to  them,  came  again 
to  the  hotel,  and  was  gradually  the  same  as  be- 
fore, but  not  quite.  For  he  had  "  pricked  up 
his  ears  "  as  the  phrase  goes. 

The  Saturday  evening  tete-a-tete  were  resumed 
as  before.  Now  that  the  postmaster  had  become 
more  serious,  and  showed  interest  in  the  deeper 
things  of  life,  the  doctor  considered  the  time  had 
come  to  communicate  to  him  some  of  the  stock 
of  observations  which  he  had  made  on  human 
life,  without  any  reference  to  his  own  particular 
experience.  It  was  reported  that  he  had  been 
married  and  had  children  but  no  one  knew  exactly 
the  facts  of  the  case. 

After  he  had  satisfied  himself  that  the  post- 
master liked  being  read  to  aloud,  he  ventured 
to  suggest  to  him  that  they  should  spend  the 
Saturday  evenings  in  this  higher  form  of  recrea- 
tion, after  they  had  first  exchanged  opinions  on 
the  questions  of  the  day,  as  suggested  by  the 
events  of  the  week.  The  subject-matter  read 
would  then  provide  occasion  for  further  explan- 
ations and  expressions  of  thought. 

B 


18    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

Accordingly,  on  Saturday  evening  after 
supper,  while  the  weather  outside  was  cold  and 
wet,  they  sat  in  the  best  room  of  the  doctor's 
house.  After  searching  for  some  time  in  a  cup- 
board the  doctor  fished  out  a  manuscript ;  at  the 
last  moment  he  hesitated — perhaps  because  it  was 
autobiographical.  In  order  to  give  himself 
courage  he  began  with  some  preliminary 
remarks. 

:<  I  don't  think  that,  in  your  recollection,  I 
have  expressed  my  views  on  a  certain  question — 
the  most  important  one  of  our  time.  This  ques- 
tion, which  touches  the  deepest  things  in  life,  and 
is  treated  most  superficially  because  it  is  taken 
up  in  a  spirit  of  partisanship.  ...  I  mean " 

' '  Never  mind  !  I  know !  ' 

'  You  are  afraid  of  it,  but  I  am  not,  for  it  is  no 
question  for  me,  but  a  riddle  or  an  insoluble  prob- 
lem. You  know  that  there  are  insoluble  problems 
whose  insolubility  can  be  proved,  but  still  men 
continue  to  investigate  the  unsearchable." 

* '  Come  to  the  point !  Let  us  argue  afterwards. ' ' 

' '  And  they  have  tried  to  make  laws  to  regulate 
the  behaviour  of  married  people  to  each  other; 
that  is  as  though  one  should  lay  down  rules  for 
forming  a  friendship  or  falling  in  love.  Well  and 
good !  I  will  tell  you  a  story  or  two,  and  then 
we  shall  see  whether  the  matter  comes  under 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND     19 

the  head  of  consideration  at  all,  or  whether  the 
usual  laws  of  thought  apply  in  this  case." 

"Very  well." 

'  One  thing  more.  Don't  think  because 
quarantine  is  mentioned  in  the  story  that  it  is  my 
story.  That  is  buried  deeper.  Now  we  will 
begin." 


THE  DOCTOR'S   FIRST  STORY 


THE   DOCTOR'S   FIRST   STORY 
I 

THEY  had  gone  off,  taken  the  almost  matter-of- 
course  flight.  An  outcry  rang  through  their 
social  circle;  people  pressed  their  hands  to  the 
region  of  their  heart,  shuddered,  lamented,  con- 
demned, according  as  each  had  figured  to  him 
or  herself  the  terrible  tragedy  which  had  been 
played;  two  hearts  had  been  torn  asunder,  two 
families  raged  against  each  other;  there  was  a 
lonely  husband  and  a  deserted  child;  a  desolate 
home,  a  career  destroyed,  entangled  affairs  which 
could  not  be  put  straight,  and  broken  friend- 
ships. Two  men  were  sitting  in  a  restaurant  and 
discussing  the  affair. 

"  But  why  did  they  run  away?  I  think  it 
disgusting ! ' : 

' '  On  the  contrary !  I  consider  that  ordinary 
decency  requires  that  they  should  leave  the  field 
to  the  irreproachable  husband;  then  at  any  rate 
they  need  not  meet  in  the  streets.  Besides,  it  is 
more  honest  to  be  divorced  than  to  form  an  illicit 
tie." 

' '  But  why  could  they  not  keep  their  faith  and 
23 


24    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

vows  ?    We  for  our  part  hold  out  for  life  through 
grief  and  joy." 

'Yes,  and  how  does  it  look  afterwards? 
Like  an  old  bird's-nest  in  autumn !  Other  times, 
other  manners." 

"  But  it  is  terrible  in  any  case." 

"  Not  least  for  the  runaways.  Now  it  will  be 
the  turn  of  the  man  who  took  all  the  consequences 
on  himself.  He  will  be  paid  out." 

"And  so  will  she." 

The  story  was  as  follows.  The  now  divorced 
married  pair  had  met  three  years  before  in  a 
watering-place,  and  passed  through  all  the  stages 
of  being  in  love  in  the  normal  way.  They  dis- 
covered, as  usual,  that  they  had  been  born  for 
the  special  purpose  of  meeting  each  other  and 
wandering  through  life  hand  in  hand.  In  order 
to  be  worthy  of  her  he  gave  up  all  doubtful  habits 
and  refined  his  language  and  his  morals.  She 
seemed  to  him  an  angel  sent  by  God  to  open  his 
eyes  and  to  point  him  upwards.  He  overcame  the 
usual  difficulties  regarding  the  publishing  of  the 
banns,  convinced  that  those  very  difficulties  were 
placed  in  his  way  in  order  to  give  him  an  oppor- 
tunity of  showing  his  courage  and  energy. 

They  read  the  scandalous  anonymous  letters 
which  generally  follow  engagements  together, 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND    25 

and  put  them  in  the  fire.  She  wept,  it  is  true, 
over  the  wickedness  of  men,  but  he  said  the  pur- 
poj>e  of  it  was  to  test  their  faith  in  each  other. 

The  period  of  their  betrothal  was  one  long 
intoxication.  He  declared  that  he  did  not  need 
to  drink  any  more,  for  her  presence  made  him 
literally  drunk.  Once  in  a  way  they  felt  the 
weirdness  of  the  solitude  which  surrounded  them, 
for  their  friends  had  given  them  up,  considering 
themselves  superfluous. 

'  Why  do  people  avoid  us  ?  "  she  asked  one 
evening  as  they  walked  outside  the  town. 

"Because,"  he  answered,  "men  run  away 
when  they  see  happiness." 

They  did  not  notice  that  they  themselves 
avoided  intercourse  with  others,  as  they  actually 
did.  He,  especially,  showed  a  real  dread  of  meet- 
ing his  old  bachelor  friends,  for  they  seemed 
to  him  like  enemies,  and  he  saw  their  sceptical 
grimaces,  which  were  only  too  easy  to  interpret. 
1  See !  there  he  is  caught !  To  think  of  the  old 
rascal  letting  himself  be  hoodwinked!"  etc. 
For  the  young  bachelors  were  of  the  opinion  then, 
as  now,  that  love  was  a  piece  of  trickery  which 
sooner  or  later  must  be  unmasked. 

But  the  conversation  of  the  betrothed  pair 
kept  them  above  the  banalities  of  everyday  life, 
and  they  lived,  as  people  say  rightly,  above  the 


26    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

earth.  But  they  began  to  feel  afraid  of  the  soli- 
tude which  surrounded  them  and  drove  them 
together.  They  tried  to  go  among  other  people, 
partly  from  the  need  of  showing  their  happiness, 
and  partly  to  quiet  themselves.  But  when  after 
the  theatre  they  entered  a  restaurant,  and  she 
arranged  her  hair  at  the  glass  in  the  hall,  he  felt 
as  though  she  was  adorning  herself  for  strangers. 
And  when  they  sat  down  at  the  table,  he  became 
instantaneously  silent,  for  her  face  assumed  a 
new  expression  which  was  strange  to  him.  Her 
glances  seemed  to  parry  the  looks  of  strangers. 
They  both  became  silent,  and  his  face  wore  an 
anxious  expression.  It  was  a  dismal  supper, 
and  they  soon  left. 

When  they  came  out  she  asked,  somewhat  out 
of  humour  at  being  disappointed  of  a  pleasure, 
' ;  Are  you  vexed  with  me  ?  ' 

;'  No,  my  dear,  I  cannot  be  vexed  with  you. 
But  I  bleed  inwardly  when  I  see  young  fellows 
desecrate  you  with  their  looks."  So  their  visits 
to  the  restaurant  ceased. 

The  weeks  before  the  marriage  were  spent  in 
arranging  their  future  dwelling.  They  had  dis- 
cussed carpets  and  curtains,  had  interviewed 
workmen  and  shopmen,  and  in  so  doing  had 
descended  from  their  ideal  heights.  Now  they 
wanted  to  go  out  to  get  rid  of  these  prosaic 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND    27 

impressions.  So  they  went,  but  with  that 
ominous  silence  when  the  heads  of  a  pair  feel 
empty  and  someone  seems  to  walk  between  them. 
He  tried  to  rally  himself  and  put  her  in  good 
spirits  but  unsuccessfully. 

'  I  hang  too  heavily  upon  you,"  she  said,  and 
let  go  of  his  arm.  He  did  not  answer,  for  he  really 
felt  some  relief.  That  annoyed  her  and  she  drew 
nearer  the  wall.  The  conversation  was  at  an  end, 
and  they  soon  found  themselves  before  her  door. 
'  Good  night,"  she  said  curtly. 

"  Good  night,"  he  replied  with  equal  curtness, 
and  they  parted  obviously  to  their  mutual  relief. 
This  time  there  was  no  kiss  in  the  passage  and  he 
did  not  wait  outside  the  glass  door  to  watch  her 
slender  figure  move  gracefully  up  the  first  flight 
of  stairs. 

He  went  down  the  street  with  an  elastic  gait 
and  drawing  a  deep  breath  of  relief.  He  felt 
released  from  something  oppressive,  which  never- 
theless had  been  charming  for  three  months. 
Pulling  himself  together,  he  mentally  picked  up 
the  dropped  threads  of  a  past  which  now  seemed 
strong  and  sincere.  He  hurried  on,  his  ego 
exulted,  and  both  his  arms,  as  they  swung,  felt 
like  wings. 

That  the  affair  was  over  he  felt  no  doubt,  but 
he  saw  no  reason  for  it,  and  with  wideawake 


28    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

consciousness  confronted  a  fact  which  he  unhesi- 
tatingly accepted.  When  he  came  near  his  door 
he  met  an  old  friend  whom,  without  further  ado, 
he  took  by  the  arm,  and  invited  to  share  his 
simple  supper  and  to  talk.  His  friend  looked 
astonished,  but  followed  him  up  the  stairs. 

They  ate  and  drank,  smoked  and  chatted  till 
midnight,  discussing  every  variety  of  topic,  old 
reminiscences  and  affairs  of  State,  the  Reichstag 
and  political  economy.  There  was  not  a  word 
regarding  his  betrothal  and  marriage,  or  even  an 
allusion  to  them.  It  was  a  very  enjoyable  even- 
ing and  he  seemed  to  have  gone  back  three  months 
in  his  life.  He  noticed  that  his  voice  assumed  a 
more  manly  tone,  that  he  spoke  his  thoughts 
straight  out  as  they  came,  without  having  to  take 
the  trouble  to  round  off  the  corners  of  strong 
words  to  emphasise  some  expressions,  and  soften 
down  others  in  order  not  to  give  offence.  He  felt 
as  though  he  had  found  himself  again,  thrown  off 
a  strait-jacket,  and  laid  aside  a  mask.  He  accom- 
panied his  friend  downstairs  to  open  the  house- 
door. 

'  Well,  you  will  be  married  in  eight  days,"  said 
the  latter  with  the  usual  sceptical  grimace.  It 
was  as  though  he  had  pressed  a  button  and  the 
door  slammed  to  in  answer. 

When  he  came  to  his  room,  he  felt  seized  with 


FAIIl    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND    29 

disgust ;  he  took  the  things  off  the  table,  cleared 
up,  swept  the  room,  and  then  became  conscious 
of  what  he  had  lost,  and  how  low  he  had  sunk. 

He  felt  he  had  been  unfaithful  to  his  betrothed, 
because  he  had  given  his  soul  to  another,  even 
though  that  other  was  a  man.  He  had  lost  some- 
thing better  than  that  which  he  thought  he  had 
gained.  What  he  had  found  again  was  merely 
his  old  selfish,  inconsiderate,  comfortable,  every- 
day ego,  with  its  coarseness  and  uncleanness, 
which  his  friend  liked  because  it  suited  his  own. 

And  now  it  was  all  over,  and  the  link  broken 
for  ever !  The  great  solitude  would  resume  its 
sway,  the  ugly  bachelor  life  begin  again.  It  did 
not  occur  to  him  to  sit  down  and  write  a  letter, 
for  he  felt  it  would  be  useless.  Therefore  he  tried 
to  weary  himself  in  order  to  obtain  sleep,  soaked 
his  whole  head  in  cold  water,  and  so  went  to  bed. 
The  little  ceremony  of  winding  up  his  watch 
made,  to-night,  a  peculiar  impression  on  him. 
Everything  had  to  be  renewed  at  night,  even 
time  itself.  Perhaps  her  love  only  needed  a 
night's  rest  in  order  to  recommence. 

When  he  awoke  the  following  morning,  the  sun 
shone  into  the  room.  An  indescribable  feeling 
of  quietness  had  taken  possession  of  him,  and  he 
felt  that  life  was  good  as  it  was,  yes,  better  to-day 
than  usual,  for  his  soul  felt  at  home  again  after 


30    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

a  long  excursion.  He  dressed  himself  and  went 
to  his  office,  opened  his  letters,  read  the  news- 
paper, and  felt  quite  calm  all  the  time.  But  this 
unnatural  calm  began  at  last  to  make  him  uneasy. 
He  felt  an  increasing  nervousness  and  a  feverish- 
ness  over  his  whole  body.  The  vacuum  began 
to  be  filled  again  with  her  soul ;  the  electric  band 
had  been  stretched,  and  the  stream  cut  off,  but 
it  was  still  there ;  there  had  only  been  a  break  in 
the  current,  and  now  all  the  recollections  rushed 
upon  him,  all  their  beautiful  and  great  experi- 
ences, all  the  elevated  feelings  and  great 
thoughts  which  they  had  amassed  together,  all 
the  dream-world  in  which  they  had  lived,  so  un- 
like the  present  world  of  prose  where  they  now 
found  themselves. 

With  a  feeling  of  despair  he  betook  himself  to 
his  correspondence  in  order  to  conceal  his  emo- 
tions, and  began  to  answer  letters  with  calmness, 
order,  and  clearness.  Offers  were  accepted  on 
certain  conditions,  and  declined  on  definite 
grounds.  He  went  into  questions  of  coffee  and 
sugar,  exchange  prices  and  accounts  with  unusual 
clearness  and  decision. 

A  clerk  brought  him  a  letter,  which  he  saw  at 
once  was  from  her. 

'  The  messenger  waits  for  an  answer,"  he  said. 

Without    looking    up    from    his    desk,    the 


FAIE    HAVEN    AND    FOUL     STRAND    31 

merchant  had  at  once  decided  and  replied : 
"He  needn't  wait." 

In  that  moment  he  had  said  to  himself  :  "  Ex- 
planations, reproaches,  accusations — how  can 
I  answer  such  things?  " 

And  the  letter  lay  unopened  while  his  business 
correspondence  went  on  with  stormy  celerity. 

When  his  fiancee  had  parted  from  him  on  the 
previous  evening  her  first  emotion  had  been  anger 
—anger  to  think  that  he,  the  merchant,  had 
dared  to  despise  her.  She  herself  belonged  to  an 
official's  family  and  had  dreamt  of  playing  a  role 
in  society.  His  warm  and  faithful  affection  had 
made  her  gradually  forget  this.  Since  he  was 
never  weary  of  telling  her  what  an  ennobling 
influence  she  exercised  on  his  life,  and  since  she 
herself  perceived  how  he  became  refined  and 
beautiful  under  her  hand,  she  felt  herself  to  be  a 
higher  being.  His  steady  veneration  kindled  her 
self-esteem  and  she  grew  and  blossomed  in  the 
sunshine  which  his  love  spread  around  her.  When 
that  was  suddenly  extinguished,  it  grew  cold  and 
dark  around  her;  she  felt  herself  dwindle  down 
to  her  original  insignificance,  shrivel  and  dis- 
appear. This  discovery  that  she  had  been  the 
victim  of  an  error  and  that  his  love  was  the  cause 
of  her  new  life  and  the  enlargement  of  her 


32    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

personality,  aroused  her  hatred  against  the  man 
who  had  given  her  such  clear  proof  that  her  exist- 
ence depended  on  him  and  on  his  love.  Now  that 
he  was  no  longer  her  lover,  he  became  the  trades- 
man whom  she  despised. 

' '  A  fellow  who  sells  coffee  and  sugar !  ' '  she 
said  to  herself,  as  she  fell  asleep,  "  I  could 
change  him  for  a  better  one." 

But  when  she  awoke  after  a  good  night's  sleep, 
she  felt  alarmed  at  the  disgrace  of  being  given  up. 
A  broken  engagement,  after  two  offers,  would 
always  cast  a  shadow  over  her  life  and  make  it 
difficult  to  procure  another  fiance*. 

In  a  spiteful  mood  she  sat  down  to  write  the 
letter,  in  which  in  a  lofty,  insulting  tone  she 
demanded  an  explanation,  and  at  the  same  time 
asked  him  to  come  and  see  her. 

When  the  messenger  returned  with  the  news 
that  there  was  no  answer  she  fell  in  a  rage,  and 
prepared  to  go  out.  She  intended  to  find  him  in 
his  office,  where  she  had  never  yet  been,  and 
before  the  eyes  of  his  clerks  throw  his  ring  on  the 
ground  to  show  how  deeply  she  despised  him. 
So  she  went. 

She  stood  outside  the  door  and  knocked.  But 
since  no  one  opened  or  answered  she  entered  and 
stood  in  the  hall.  Through  the  glass  pane  of  the 
inner  door  she  saw  her  betrothed  bending  over 


FAIE    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      33 

the  large  ledger,  his  face  intent  and  serious.  She 
had  never  seen  him  at  work  before.  And  when 
at  work  every  man,  even  the  most  insignificant,  is 
imposing.  Sacred  work,  which  makes  a  man 
what  he  is,  invested  his  appearance  with  the 
dignity  of  concentrated  strength,  and  she  was 
seized  with  a  feeling  of  respect  for  him  which  she 
could  not  throw  off. 

Just  then  he  was  inspecting  in  the  ledger  the 
entries  of  the  expenses  of  furnishing  their  house. 

They  had  absorbed  his  savings  during  the  ten 
years  he  had  been  in  business,  and  though  not 
petty-minded,  he  thought  with  sorrow  and  bitter- 
ness, how  they  were  all  thrown  away.  He  sighed 
and  looked  up  in  order  not  to  see  the  tell-tale 
figures.  Then,  all  of  a  sudden,  he  noticed  behind 
the  glass  pane  of  the  door,  like  a  crayon  drawing 
in  a  frame,  a  pale  face  and  two  large  eyes  full  of 
an  expression  of  pain  and  sympathy.  He  rose  and 
stood  reverently,  mute  in  his  great,  virile  grief, 
interrogative  and  trembling.  Then  he  saw  in  her 
looks  how  the  lost  love  had  returned,  and  with 
that  all  was  said. 

When  after  a  while  they  were  walking  past 
Skeppsholm,  bright  with  their  recovered  happi- 
ness, he  asked  :  "  What  happened  to  us  yester- 
day? '  (He  said  "  us  "  for  he  did  not  wish  to 
raise  the  question  whose  fault  it  was.) 

o 


34    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

'  I  don't  know ;  I  cannot  explain  it ;  but  it  was 
the  most  terrible  experience  I  have  had.  We  will 
never  do  it  again ! ' ' 

"No!  we  will  never  do  it  again.  And  now, 
Ebb  a,  it  is  for  our  whole  lives,  you  and  I ! J: 

She  pressed  his  arm,  fully  convinced  that  after 
this  fiery  trial,  nothing  in  the  world  could  separate 
them,  so  far  as  it  depended  on  themselves. 


n 

And  they  were  married.  But  instead  of  hiding 
their  happiness  in  their  beautiful  clean  home, 
they  set  out  on  a  journey  among  strange,  indiffe- 
rent, curious,  and  even  hostile  people.  Then 
they  went  from  hotel  to  hotel,  were  stared  at  at 
tables  d'hote,  got  headaches  in  museums,  and  in 
the  evening  were  dumb  with  fatigue  and  put  out 
of  humour  by  mishaps. 

Torn  away  from  his  work  and  his  surroundings, 
the  industrious  man  found  it  difficult  to  collect 
himself.  When  his  thoughts  went  back  to  the 
business  matters  which  he  had  left  in  the  hands 
of  others,  he  was  inattentive  and  tiresome.  They 
both  longed  for  home,  but  were  ashamed  to 
return  and  to  be  received  with  ridicule. 

The  first  week  they  occupied  the  time  by  talk- 


FAIR    HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND      35 

ing  over  the  recollections  of  their  engagement; 
during  the  second  week  they  discussed  the 
journeys  of  the  first.  They  never  lived  in  the 
present  but  in  the  past.  When  there  was  an  inter- 
val of  dullness  or  silence  he  had  always  comforted 
her  with  the  thought  that  their  intercourse  would 
be  easier  when  they  had  amassed  a  store  of 
common  memories,  and  had  learnt  to  avoid  each 
other's  antipathies.  Meanwhile,  out  of  considera- 
tion, they  had  borne  with  these  and  suppressed 
their  own  peculiarities  and  weaknesses  as  well- 
brought-up  people  usually  do.  This  led  to  a 
feeling  of  restraint  and  being  on  one's  guard 
which  was  exhausting ;  and  the  time  had  come  for 
making  important  discoveries.  Since  he  pos- 
sessed more  self-control  than  she  did,  he  was 
careful  not  to  say  too  much,  but  concealed  one 
inclination  and  habit  after  another,  while  she 
revealed  all  hers.  As  he  loved  her,  he  wished  to 
be  agreeable,  and  therefore  learned  to  be  silent. 
The  result  was  that  with  all  her  inherited  habits, 
peculiarities,  and  prejudices  she  had  so  insinuated 
herself  into  his  life  that  he  began  to  feel  himself 
attenuated  and  annihilated. 

One  evening  the  young  wife  was  seized  with  a 
sudden  desire  to  praise  her  sister,  a  hateful 
coquette,  whom  her  husband  disliked  because 
she  had  tried,  from  selfish  motives,  to  break  their 


engagement.  He  listened  to  his  wife  in  respectful 
silence,  now  and  then  murmuring  an  indistinct 
assent.  At  last  his  wife's  praise  of  her  sister 
mounted  to  a  paean,  and  though  he  thought  her 
affection  for  her  relatives  a  fine  trait  in  her 
character,  he  could  not  entirely  place  himself  in 
her  skin  nor  see  with  her  eyes.  So  he  took  refuge 
in  the  kind  of  silence  which  is  more  eloquent  than 
plain  words.  This  silence  was  accompanied  by  a 
gnawing  of  the  lips  and  a  violent  perspiration. 
All  the  words  and  opinions  he  had  suppressed 
found  mute  expression  in  these  movements  of  his 
lips — he  merely  ' '  marked  time  * '  as  actors  say — 
and  the  breaths  which  were  not  used  in  forming 
words,  he  emitted  through  his  nose.  Simultane- 
ously the  pores  of  his  skin  opened  as  so  many 
safety-valves  for  his  suppressed  emotions,  and  it 
became  really  unpleasant  to  have  him  at  the  table. 

The  young  wife  did  not  conceal  her  annoyance, 
for  she  feared  no  revenge.  She  made  an  ugly 
gesture,  which  always  ill  becomes  a  woman;  she 
held  her  nose  with  both  fingers,  looking  around 
to  those  present  as  if  to  ask  whether  she  was  not 
right ! 

Her  husband  became  pale,  rose,  and  went  out. 
Several  people  were  sitting  close  by  who  wit- 
nessed the  unpleasant  scene.  When  he  came  out 
on  the  streets  of  the  foreign  town,  he  unbuttoned 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      37 

his  waistcoat  and  breathed  freely.    And  then  his 
thoughts  took  their  own  course  ruthlessly. 

'  I  am  becoming  a  hypocrite  simply  out  of 
consideration  for  her.  One  lie  is  piled  up  on 
another,  and  some  day  it  will  all  come  down  with 
a  crash.  What  a  coarse  woman  she  is !  And  it 
was  from  her  that  I  believed  I  should  learn  and 
be  refined  into  a  higher  being.  It  is  all  optical 
delusion  and  deceit.  All  this  '  love  '  is  merely  a 
piece  of  trickery  on  the  part  of  nature  to  dazzle 
one's  sight." 

He  tried  to  picture  to  himself  what  was 
now  happening  in  the  dining-room.  She  would 
naturally  weep  and  appeal  with  her  eyes  to  those 
present  as  if  to  ask  whether  she  was  not  very 
unfortunate  with  such  a  husband.  It  was  indeed 
her  habit  so  to  appeal  with  her  eyes,  and  when  he 
expected  an  answer  from  her,  she  always  turned 
her  looks  on  those  around  as  if  asking  for  help 
against  her  oppressor.  He  was  always  treated  as 
a  tyrant,  although  out  of  pure  kindness  he  had 
made  himself  her  slave.  There  was  no  help  for  it ! 

He  found  himself  down  by  the  harbour,  and 
caught  sight  of  the  swimming-baths — that  was 
just  what  he  wanted.  Quickly  lie  plunged  into 
the  sea,  and  swam  far  out  into  the  darkness.  His 
soul,  tortured  by  mosquito-stings  and  nettle- 
pricks,  was  able  to  cool  itself,  and  he  felt  how  be 


38    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

left  a  wake  of  dirt  behind  him.  He  lay  on  his 
back  and  gazed  at  the  starry  sky,  but  at  the  same 
moment  heard  a  whistling  and  splashing  behind 
him.  It  was  a  great  steamer  coming  in,  and  he 
had  to  get  out  of  the  way  to  save  his  life.  He 
made  for  the  lamp-lit  shore  and  saw  the  hotel  with 
all  its  lights. 

When  he  had  dressed,  he  felt  an  unmeasured 
sorrow — sorrow  over  his  lost  paradise.  At  the 
same  time  all  bitterness  had  passed  away. 

In  this  mood  he  entered  his  room  and  found 
his  wife  seated  at  the  writing-table.  She  rose  and 
threw  herself  into  his  arms  without  a  word  of 
apology;  naturally  enough  he  did  not  desire  it, 
and  she  had  no  idea  of  having  done  wrong. 

They  sat  down  and  wept  together  over  their 
vanished  love,  for  that  it  had  gone  there  was  no 
doubt.  But  it  had  gone  without  their  will,  and 
they  sorrowed  over  it,  as  over  some  dear  friend 
which  they  had  not  killed  but  could  not  save. 
They  were  confronted  by  a  fact  before  which  they 
were  helpless ;  love  the  good  genius  who  magnifies 
every  trifle,  rejuvenates  what  is  old,  beautifies 
what  is  ugly,  had  abandoned  them,  and  life 
stretched  before  them  in  naked  monotony. 

But  it  did  not  occur  to  them  that  they  would 
be  separated  or  were  separated,  for  their  grief 
itself  was  an  experience  they  shared,  which  held 


FAIR    EAVEff   AND    FOXTL    STRAND      39 

them  together.  They  were  also  united  in  a 
common  grudge  against  Fate,  which  had  so 
deceived  them  in  their  tenderest  emotions.  In 
their  great  dejection  they  were  not  capable  of 
such  a  strong  feeling  as  hate.  They  only  felt 
resentment  and  indignation  at  Fate,  which  was 
their  scapegoat  and  lightning-conductor. 

They  had  never  talked  so  harmoniously  and 
so  intimately  before,  and  while  their  voices 
assumed  a  more  affectionate  tone,  they  formed 
a  firm  resolve  to  go  home  and  commence  their 
domestic  life.  He  talked  himself  into  a  state  of 
enthusiasm  at  the  thought  of  home,  where  one 
could  exclude  all  evil  influences,  and  where  peace 
and  harmony  would  reign.  She  also  dilated  on 
the  same  topic  with  similar  warmth  till  they  had 
forgotten  their  sorrow.  And  when  they  had 
forgotten  it,  they  smiled  as  before,  and  behold ! 
love  was  again  there,  and  not  dead  at  all;  its 
death  was  also  a  delusion  and  so  was  all  their; 
grief. 

m 

He  had  realised  his  youthful  dream  of  a  wife 
and  a  home,  and  for  eight  days  the  young  wife 
also  thought  that  her  dream  had  come  true.  But 
on  the  ninth  day  she  wanted  to  go  out. 


40    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

"Where?  "  he  asked. 

"  Say,  yourself!" 

No,  she  must  say.  He  proposed  the  opera,  but 
Wagner  was  being  performed  there,  and  she 
could  not  bear  him.  The  theatre?  No,  there  they 
had  Maeterlinck,  and  that  was  silly.  He  did  not 
wish  to  go  to  an  operetta,  for  they  always  ridi- 
culed what  he  now  regarded  as  sacred.  Nor  did 
he  like  the  circus,  where  there  were  only  horses 
and  queer  women. 

So  the  discussion  went  on  and  they  privately 
discovered  a  great  quantity  of  divergences  in 
tastes  and  principles.  In  order  to  please  her,  he 
proposed  an  operetta,  but  she  would  not  accept 
the  sacrifice.  He  suggested  that  they  should 
give  a  party,  but  then  they  discovered  that  there 
was  no  one  to  invite,  for  they  had  separated  from 
their  friends,  and  their  friends  from  them. 

So  they  sat  there,  still  in  harmony,  and  con- 
sidered their  destiny  together,  without  having 
yet  begun  to  blame  each  other.  They  stayed  at 
home,  and  felt  bored. 

Next  day,  the  same  scene  was  repeated.  He 
now  saw  that  his  happiness  was  at  stake ;  there- 
fore he  took  courage,  and  said  in  a  friendly  way 
but  decidedly,  "  Dress  yourself  and  we  will  go  to 
an  operetta."  She  beamed,  put  on  her  new 
dress,  and  was  quickly  ready.  When  he  saw  her 


FAIR    HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND      41 

so  happy  and  pretty,  he  felt  a  stab  in  his  heart, 
and  thought  to  himself,  ' '  Now  she  brightens  up, 
when  she  can  dress  for  others  and  not  for  me." 
When  he  then  conducted  her  to  the  theatre,  he 
felt  as  though  he  were  escorting  a  stranger,  for 
her  thoughts  were  already  in  the  auditorium, 
which  was  her  stage,  where  she  wished  to  appear, 
and  where  she  could  now  appear  under  her 
husband's  escort  without  being  insulted. 

Since  they  could  already  divine  each  other's 
thoughts,  this  alienation,  while  they  were  on  the 
way,  changed  into  something  like  hostility.  They 
longed  to  be  in  the  theatre  in  order  to  find  some- 
thing to  divert  their  emotions,  though  he  felt  as 
though  he  were  going  to  an  execution. 

When  they  came  to  the  ticket-office  there  were 
no  tickets  left. 

Then  her  face  changed,  and  when  she  looked 
at  him,  and  thought  she  saw  an  expression  of 
satisfaction,  which  possibly  was  latent  there,  she 
broke  out,  "  That  pleases  you?  " 

He  wished  to  deny  it,  but  could  not,  for  it  was 
true.  On  the  way  home  he  felt  as  though  he  were 
dragging  a  corpse  with  him,  and  that  a  hostile 
one. 

The  fact  that  she  had  discovered  his  very 
natural  thought,  which  he  had  self-denyingly 
repressed,  hurt  him  like  a  rudeness,  for  one  has 


42    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

no  right  to  punish  the  thoughts  of  another.  He 
would  have  borne  it  more  easily  if  there  had  been 
no  tickets  left,  for  he  was  already  accustomed  to 
be  a  scapegoat.  But  now  he  lamented  over  his 
lost  happiness,  and  that  he  had  not  the  power  to 
amuse  her. 

When  she  observed  that  he  was  not  angry,  but 
only  sad,  she  despised  him.  They  came  home  in 
ominous  silence ;  she  went  straight  to  her  bedroom 
and  shut  the  door.  He  sat  down  in  the  dining- 
room,  where  he  lit  the  lamps  and  candles,  for  the 
darkness  seemed  to  be  closing  round  him. 

Then  he  heard  a  cry  from  the  bedroom,  the  cry 
of  a  child,  but  of  a  grown  one.  When  he  came 
in  he  saw  a  sight  which  tore  his  heart.  She  was 
on  her  knees,  her  hands  stretched  towards  him, 
wailing  as  she  wept,  "  Don't  be  angry  with  me, 
don't  be  hard;  you  put  out  the  light  round  me, 
you  stifle  me  with  your  severity ;  I  am  a  child  that 
trusts  life  and  must  have  sunshine." 

He  could  find  no  answer,  for  she  seemed  sin- 
cere. And  he  could  not  defend  himself,  for  that 
meant  arraigning  her  thoughts,  which  he  also 
could  not  do. 

Dumb  with  despair,  he  went  into  his  room  and 
felt  crushed.  He  had  pillaged  her  youth,  shut  her 
up,  torn  out  her  joy  by  the  roots.  He  had  not 
the  light  which  this  tender  flower  needed,  and 


FAIR    EATEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND      43 

she  withered  under  his  hand.  These  self- 
reproaches  broke  down  all  the  self-confidence  he 
had  hitherto  possessed;  he  felt  unworthy  of  her 
love,  or  of  any  woman's,  and  felt  himself  a 
murderer  who  had  killed  her  happiness. 

After  he  had  suffered  all  these  pangs  of  con- 
science he  began  to  examine  himself  calmly  and 
with  sober  common  sense. 

"What  have  I  done?'3  he  asked  himself. 
"  What  have  I  done  to  her?  All  the  good  that 
I  could;  I  have  done  her  will  in  everything.  I 
did  not  wish  to  go  out  in  the  evening,  when  I  had 
come  home  after  the  work  of  the  day,  and  I  did 
not  wish  to  see  an  operetta.  An  operetta  was 
formerly  a  matter  of  indifference  to  me,  but  now 
it  is  distasteful,  since  through  my  love  for  her 
I  have  entered  another  sphere  of  emotion  which 
I  do  not  hesitate  to  call  a  higher  one.  How  foolish 
of  me !  I  had  the  idea  that  she  would  draw  me 
out  of  the  mire,  but  she  draws  me  down ;  she  has 
drawn  me  down  the  whole  time.  Then  it  is  not 
she  but  my  love  which  draws  upward,  for  there 
is  a  higher  and  a  lower.  Yes,  the  sage  was  right 
who  said,  '  Men  marry  to  have  a  home  to  come  to 
to,  women  marry  to  have  a  home  to  go  out  of.' 
Home  is  not  for  the  woman  but  for  the  man  and 
the  child.  All  women  complain  of  being  shut  up 
at  home,  and  so  does  mine,  although  she  goes 


44      FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL   STRAND 

about  the  whole  morning  paying  visits,  and 
haunting  cafes  and  shops." 

He  began  to  work  his  way  out  of  this  slough  of 
despond,  and  found  himself  on  the  side  where 
the  fault  was  not.  But  again  he  saw  the  heart- 
rending spectacle  of  his  young  wife  on  her  knees 
begging  him,  with  outstretched  hands,  not  to  kill 
her  youth  and  brightness  with  his  severity.  Since 
it  was  foreign  to  his  nature  to  act  a  part,  he  felt 
sure  that  she  was  not  doing  so,  and  felt  again  like 
a  criminal,  so  that  he  was  tempted  to  commit 
suicide,  for  the  mere  fact  of  his  existence  crushed 
her  happiness. 

But  again  his  sense  of  justice  was  aroused,  for 
he  had  no  right  to  take  the  blame  on  himself  when 
he  did  not  deserve  it.  He  was  not  hard  but  he 
was  serious,  and  it  was  just  his  seriousness  which 
had  made  the  deepest  impression  on  the  young 
girl  and  decided  her  to  prefer  him  to  other  frivo- 
lous young  men.  He  had  not  wished  to  kill  her 
joy;  on  the  contrary  he  had  done  everything  in 
his  power  to  procure  for  her  the  quiet  joys  of 
domesticity ;  he  had  not  even  wished  to  deny  her 
the  ambiguous  pleasure  of  the  operetta,  but  had 
sacrificed  himself  and  accompanied  her  thither. 
What  she  had  said  was  therefore  simply  nonsense. 
And  yet  her  grief  had  been  so  deep  and  sincere. 
What  was  the  meaning  of  it  ? 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      45 

Then  came  the  answer.  It  was  the  girl's  leave- 
taking  of  youth — which  was  inevitable.  It  was 
therefore  as  natural  as  it  was  beautiful — this  out- 
break of  despair  at  the  brevity  of  spring.  But  he 
was  not  to  blame  for  it,  and  if  his  wife  perhaps 
in  a  year  was  to  become  a  mother,  it  was  now  the 
right  time  to  bid  farewell  to  girlish  joys  in  order 
to  prepare  for  the  higher  joys  of  maternity. 

He  had,  therefore,  nothing  to  reproach  himself 
with,  and  yet  he  did  reproach  himself  with  every- 
thing. With  a  quick  resolve,  he  shook  off  his 
depression  and  went  to  his  wife,  firmly  deter- 
mining not  to  say  a  word  in  his  defence,  for  that 
meant  extinguishing  her  love,  but  simply  to  invite 
her  to  reconciliation  without  a  reckoning. 

He  found  his  wife  on  the  point  of  being  weary 
of  solitude,  and  she  would  have  welcomed  the 
society  of  anyone,  even  that  of  her  husband, 
rather  than  be  quite  alone. 

Then  they  came  to  an  agreement  to  give  a 
party  and  to  invite  his  friends  and  hers,  who 
would  be  sure  to  come.  This  evening  their  need 
for  domestic  peace  and  comfort  was  so  mutual 
that  they  agreed,  without  any  difficulty,  who 
should  be  invited  and  who  not. 

They  closed  the  day  by  drinking  a  bottle  of 
champagne.  The  sparkling  drink  loosened  her 
tongue  and  now  she  took  the  opportunity  to  make 


46    FAIR  HAVEN  AND    FOUL    STRAND 

him  gentle  and  jesting  reproaches  for  his  egotism 
and  discourtesy  towards  his  wife.  She  looked  so 
pretty  as  she  raised  herself  on  tiptoe  above  him, 
and  she  seemed  so  much  greater  and  nobler  when 
she  had  rolled  all  her  faults  upon  him,  that  he 
thought  it  a  pity  to  pull  her  down,  and  therefore 
went  to  sleep  laden  with  all  the  defects  and  short- 
comings which  he  had  taken  on  himself. 

When  he  awoke  the  next  morning  he  lay  still 
in  order  to  think  over  the  events  of  the  past 
evening.  And  now  he  despised  himself  for 
having  kept  silence  and  refrained  from  defending 
himself.  Now  he  perceived  how  the  whole  of 
their  life  together  was  built  upon  his  silence  and 
the  suppression  of  his  personality.  For  if  he  had 
spoken  yesterday,  she  would  have  gone — she 
always  threatened  to  go  to  her  mother  when  he 
"  ill-treated  "  her,  and  she  called  it  "  ill-treat- 
ment "  every  time  that  he  was  tired  of  making 
himself  out  worse  than  he  was.  Here  they  were 
building  on  falsity,  and  the  building  would  col- 
lapse some  day  when  he  ventured  on  a  criticism 
or  personal  remark  regarding  her. 

Reverence,  worship,  blind  obedience — that 
was  the  price  of  her  love — he  must  either  pay  it, 
or  go  without  it. 

The  party  took  place.  The  husband,  as  a  good 
host,  did  all  he  could  to  efface  himself  and  bring 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      47 

his  wife  into  prominence.  His  friends,  who  were 
gentlemen,  behaved  to  her  in  their  turn  with  all 
the  courtesy  which  they  felt  was  due  to  a  young 
wife. 

After  supper  music  was  proposed.  There  was 
a  piano  in  the  house,  but  the  wife  could  not  play, 
and  the  husband  did  not  want  to.  A  young 
doctor  undertook  the  task,  and  since  he  had  to 
choose  his  own  programme,  he  had  resort  to  his 
favourite,  Wagner.  The  mistress  of  the  house 
did  not  know  what  he  was  playing  but  did  not 
like  the  deep  seriousness  of  it.  When  at  last  the 
thunder  ceased,  her  husband  sat  uneasily  there, 
for  he  could  surmise  what  was  coming. 

As  a  ladylike  hostess,  she  had  to  say  something. 
She  thought  a  simple  ' '  thanks ' '  insufficient,  and 
asked  what  the  music  was. 

Then  it  came  out — Wagner! 

Her  husband  felt  the  look  which  he  feared, 
which  told  him  that  he  was  a  traitor  who  perhaps 
had  wished  to  entice  her  to  praise  in  ignorance 
"the  worst  music  which  she  knew."  During 
the  time  of  their  engagement  she  had  certainly 
listened  attentively  to  her  fiance's  long  speeches 
in  defence  of  Wagner,  but  immediately  after  their 
marriage,  she  had  declared  openly  that  she  could 
not  bear  him.  Therefore  her  husband  had  never 
played  to  her,  and  she  feigned  not  to  know  that 


48    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

he  could  play.  But  now  she  felt  insidiously  sur- 
prised, and  her  husband  received  the  before- 
mentioned  look  which  told  him  what  he  had  to 
expect. 

The  guests  had  gone,  and  husband  and  wife 
sat  there  alone. 

In  his  father's  house  he  had  learnt  never  to 
speak  anything  but  good  of  departed  guests,  but 
rather  to  be  silent.  She  had  also  heard  something 
of  the  kind,  but  here  she  felt  no  need  of  restraint. 
So  now  she  began  to  criticise  his  friends;  they 
were,  to  put  it  briefly,  tedious. 

He  gnawed  his  cigar  in  silence,  for  to  dispute 
about  likings  and  taste  in  this  case  would  be 
unreasonable. 

But  she  also  considered  them  discourteous. 
She  had  been  told  that  young  men  should  say 
pleasant  things. 

' '  Did  they  venture  to  say  anything  unpleas- 
ant ? ' J  he  asked,  feeling  uneasy  lest  anyone 
should  have  forgotten  himself. 

"No,  not  exactly/' 

Then  came  a  shower  of  petty  criticisms ;  some- 
one's tie  was  not  straight,  another  had  too  long 
a  nose,  another  drawled,  and  then,  "the  fellow 
who  played  Wagner !  " 

"  You  are  not  kind,"  said  her  husband  with  a 
lame  attempt  to  defend  his  friends. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND      49 

"Yes!  and  the  friends  you  trust  in!  You 
should  only  have  heard  and  seen  the  words  and 
looks  which  I  heard  and  saw.  They  are  false  to 

you." 

He  continued  to  smoke  and  kept  silence,  but 
he  thought  how  low  he  had  sunk  to  deny  his  old 
and  tried  friends ;  how  despicable  it  was  to  plead 
for  forgiveness  with  his  eyes  for  the  performance 
of  Wagner.  His  thoughts  ran  parallel  with  her 
loud  chatter,  and  he  spoke  them  in  silence. 

'  You  despise  my  friends  because  they  do  not 
court  their  friend's  wife,  do  not  pay  her  little 
compliments  on  her  figure  and  dress;  and  you 
hate  them  because  you  feel  how  my  strength 
grows  in  the  circle  of  their  sympathies  for  me. 
You  hate  them  as  you  hate  me,  and  would  hate 
anyone  else  who  was  your  husband." 

She  must  have  felt  the  effect  of  these  thoughts, 
for  her  volubility  slackened,  and  when  he  cast 
a  glance  at  her,  she  seemed  to  have  shrunk  to- 
gether. Immediately  afterwards  she  rose,  on  the 
pretext  that  she  felt  freezing.  As  a  matter  of 
fact,  she  was  trembling  and  had  red  flames  on 
her  cheeks. 

That  night  he  observed  for  the  first  time  that 
he  had  at  his  side  an  ugly  old  woman  who  had 
enamelled  her  face  with  bright  cosmetics  and 
plaited  her  hair  like  a  peasant  woman. 


50    FAIR  HAVEN  AND    FOUL    STRAND 

She  did  not  bother  herself  to  appear  at  her 
best  before  him  but  was  already  free  and  easy 
and  cynical  enough  to  make  herself  repugnant  by 
disclosing  the  unbeautiful  secrets  of  the  toilet. 

Then  for  a  moment  he  was  released  from  his 
enchantment,  and  continued  to  think  of  flight  till 
sleep  had  pity  on  him. 

A  couple  of  weeks  passed  in  dull  silence.  He 
could  not  get  rid  of  the  thought  that  it  was  a  pity 
about  her,  and  when  she  was  bored,  it  was  his 
fault  for  the  moment,  because  he  was  her  hus- 
band— for  the  moment.  To  seek  for  others' 
society  was  now  no  longer  possible,  since  his 
friends  had  been  rejected,  and  she  had  no  more 
pleasure  in  her  own.  They  tried  to  go  out  each 
his  own  way  but  always  returned  home. 

"  You  find  it  hard  to  be  away  from  me,  in  spite 
of  all!  "  she  said. 

•"And  you?  "  he  answered. 

She  remained  compliant  and  indifferent,  no 
longer  angry,  so  that  they  could  talk,  i.e.  he 
ventured  to  answer. 

"  My  jailor !  "  she  said  on  one  occasion. 

"  Who  is  in  jail,  you  or  I?  "  he  answered. 

When  they  perceived  that  they  were  each 
other's  prisoners,  they  smiled  at  the  relationship 
and  began  to  examine  the  witchcraft  of  which 
they  were  victims.  They  went  back  in  memory 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOTJL    STRAND      61 

and  lived  over  again  the  engagement  period  and 
their  wedding  journey.  Consequently  they  lived 
always  in  the  past,  never  in  the  present. 

Then  came  the  great  moment  he  had  waited  for 
as  a  liberation — the  announcement  of  her  expect- 
ing to  be  a  mother.  Her  longings  would  now 
have  an  object,  and  she  would  look  forward 
instead  of  backward.  But  even  here  he  had 
miscalculated. 

Now  she  was  angry  with  him,  for  her  beauty 
would  wither  away,  and  it  was  no  use  his  trying 
to  comfort  her  by  saying  she  would  get  up 
rejuvenated  with  recovered  beauty,  and  that  the 
crowning  happiness  awaited  her.  She  treated 
him  like  a  murderer,  and  could  not  look  at  him 
for  his  mere  scent  aroused  her  dislike.  In  order  to 
obtain  light  on  the  matter,  he  asked  their  doctor. 
The  latter  laughed  and  explained  to  him  that  in 
such  cases  women  always  thought  they  smelt 
something; — this  was  either  pure  imagination 
or  a  physical  perversion  of  the  olfactory  nerve. 

When  at  last  this  stage  was  over,  a  certain  calm 
succeeded  which  he  was  short-sighted  enough  to 
enjoy.  Since  he  was  now  sure  of  having  his  wife 
in  the  house  he  perhaps  showed  that  he  was  happy 
and  thankful  for  it.  But  he  should  not  have  done 
so,  for  now  she  saw  the  matter  from  a  new  point 
of  view. 


52    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

'  Ah !  now  you  think  you  have  me  fast,  but 
just  wait  till  I  am  up  again !  " 

The  look  which  accompanied  the  threat  gave 
him  to  understand  what  would  happen.  Now  he 
began  a  battle  with  himself  whether  he  should 
await  the  arrival  of  the  child  or  go  away  first,  in 
order  to  avoid  the  wrench  of  parting  from  it. 

Since  the  married  pair  had  entered  into  such 
a  close  relationship  that  one  could  hear  the 
thoughts  of  the  other,  he  could  keep  no  secrets 
from  her  which  she  did  not  seize  upon  forthwith. 

1 '  I  know  well  enough  that  you  contemplate 
deserting  us  and  casting  us  on  the  street." 

"  That  is  strange/'  he  remarked;  "  it  is  you 
who  have  threatened  the  whole  time  to  go  off  with 
the  child,  as  soon  as  it  came.  So  whatever  I  do  is 
wrong;  if  I  stay  you  go,  and  then  I  am  both  un- 
happy and  ridiculous ;  if  I  go  you  are  the  martyr, 
and  I  am  unhappy  and  a  scoundrel  to  boot !  That 
comes  of  having  to  do  with  women ! ' : 

How  they  got  through  the  nine  months  was  to 
him  a  puzzle.  The  last  part  of  the  time  was  the 
most  tolerable,  for  she  had  begun  to  love  the 
unborn  child,  and  love  imparted  to  her  a  higher 
beauty  than  she  had  before.  But  when  he  told 
her  so,  she  did  not  believe  him,  and  when  she 
observed  that  he  was  lulling  himself  to  sleep  with 
dreams  of  perpetual  happiness  by  her  side  she 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      53 

broke  out  again,  saying  :  ' '  You  think  you  have 
got  me  safe  now." 

"  My  dear,"  he  answered,  "when  we  vowed 
to  each  other  to  be  man  and  wife,  I  believed  that 
I  would  belong  to  you  and  you  to  me,  and  I  hoped 
that  we  should  hold  together  so  that  the  child 
should  be  born  in  a  home,  and  be  brought  up  by 
its  father  and  mother." 

And  so  on  ad  infinitum. 

The  child  came,  and  the  mother's  joy  was 
boundless.  Ennui  had  disappeared  and  the  man 
breathed  freely,  but  he  should  have  done  so  more 
imperceptibly.  For  two  sharp  eyes  saw  it  and 
two  keen  looks  said  :  ' '  You  think  that  I  am  tied 
by  the  child!" 

On  the  third  day  the  little  one  had  lost  the 
charm  of  novelty  and  was  handed  over  to  a  nurse. 
Then  dressmakers  were  summoned.  Now  he 
knew  what  was  coming.  From  that  hour  he  went 
about  like  a  man  condemned  to  death,  waiting 
for  his  execution.  He  packed  two  travelling-bags 
which  he  hid  in  his  wardrobe,  ready  to  fly  at  the 
given  signal. 

The  signal  was  given  two  days  after  his  wife 
got  up.  She  had  put  on  a  dress  of  an  extremely 
showy  cut  and  of  the  colour  called  c '  lamp-shade." 

He  took  her  out  for  a  walk  and  suffered  un- 
speakably when  he  saw  that  she  whom  he  loved, 


54    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

attracted  a  degree  of  attention  which  he  found 
obnoxious.  Even  the  street  urchins  pointed  with 
their  fingers  at  the  overdressed  lady. 

From  that  day  he  avoided  going  out  with 
her.  He  stayed  at  home  with  the  child,  and 
lamented  that  he  had  a  wife  who  made  herself 
ridiculous. 

Her  next  step  to  freedom  was  the  riding-school. 
Through  the  stable  the  doors  to  society  were 
opened  for  her.  By  means  of  horses  one  made 
acquaintances  in  the  upper  circles.  Horses  and 
dogs  form  the  transition  stage  to  the  world  from 
which  one  peers  down  in  order  to  be  able  to  dis- 
cover the  pedestrians  on  the  dusty  highways. 
The  rider  on  horseback  is  six  ells  high  instead  of 
three,  and  he  always  looks  as  though  he  wished 
that  those  who  walk  should  look  up  to  him.  The 
stable  also  was  her  means  of  introduction  to  a 
lieutenant  who  was  a  baron.  Their  hearts  re- 
sponded to  each  other,  and  since  the  baron  was  a 
clean-natured  man,  he  decidedly  refused  to  go 
through  the  stages  of  guest  and  friend  of  the 
house.  Therefore  they  went  off  together,  or 
rather,  fled. 

Her  husband  remained  behind  with  the  child. 


IV 

The  baron  jumped  into  the  Stockholm  express 
at  Sodertelje  where  he  had  arranged  to  meet  her. 
Everything  had  been  carefully  arranged  for  them 
to  be  alone  together  at  last,  but  Fate  had  other 
.designs.  When  the  baron  entered  the  railway 
carriage  he  found  his  beloved  sitting  wedged  in 
tightly  among  strangers,  so  tightly  that  there  was 
no  room  for  him.  A  glance  in  the  adjoining 
coupe  showed  him  that  it  was  full  also,  and  he 
had  to  stand  in  the  corridor.  Eage  distorted  his 
face,  and  when  he  tried  to  greet  her  with  a  secret 
and  loving  smile,  he  only  showed  his  back  teeth, 
which  she  had  never  seen  before.  To  make 
matters  worse,  he  had,  in  order  not  to  be  noticed, 
put  on  mufti.  She  had  never  seen  him  in  this, 
and  his  spring  coat  looked  faded,  now  that  it  was 
autumn.  Some  soft  summer  showers  in  the  former 
year  had  caused  the  cloth  to  pucker  near  the 
seams,  so  that  it  lay  in  many  small  wave-like 
folds.  Since  it  had  been  cut  according  to  the 
latest  fashion  it  gave  him  the  appearance  of  hav- 
ing sloping  shoulders  which  continued  the  neck 
down  to  the  arms  with  the  same  ignoble  outlines 
as  those  of  a  half -pint  bottle.  He  perspired  with 


56    FAIR  HAVEK  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

rage,  and  a  fragment  of  coal  had  settled  firmly 
on  his  nose.  She  would  like  to  fcave  jumped  up 
and  with  her  lace  handkerchief  wiped  away  the 
black  smut  but  dared  not.  He  did  not  like  to 
look  at  her  for  fear  of  displeasing  her,  and  there- 
fore remained  standing  in  the  corridor  with  his 
back  towards  her. 

When  they  reached  Katrineholm  they  had  to 
dine  if  they  did  not  wish  to  remain  hungry  till 
evening.  Here  the  man  and  the  hero  had  to 
show  himself,  and  stand  the  ordeal  or  he  was 
lost.  With  trembling  calves  and  puckered  face  he 
followed  his  lady  out  of  the  train  and  across  the 
railway  lines.  Here  he  fell  on  his  knee,  so  that 
his  hat  slipped  to  the  back  of  his  head  and 
remained  sticking  there  like  a  military  cap.  But 
the  position  which  made  the  latter  look  smart 
did  not  suit  the  unusual  hat.  In  a  word  it  was  not 
his  good  day,  and  he  had  no  luck. 

When  they  entered  the  dining-saloon,  they 
looked  as  though  they  had  quarrelled  inwardly, 
as  though  they  despised  each  other,  were 
ashamed  before  each  other,  and  mutually  wished 
themselves  apart. 

His  nerves  were  entirely  out  of  order,  and 
he  could  not  control  a  single  muscle.  Without 
knowing  what  he  was  doing,  he  pushed  her  for- 
ward to  the  table  saying,  "  Hurry  up !  " 


FAI&    HAVEtf   AND    FOUL    STRAND      67 

The  table  was  already  surrounded  by  pas- 
sengers, who  fell  on  the  viands  in  scattered  order 
and  therefore  could  not  open  their  ranks.  The 
baron  made  a  sally  and  finally  succeeded  in  seiz- 
ing a  plate,  but  as  he  wedged  in  his  arm  to  get  a 
fork,  his  hand  encountered  another  hand  which 
belonged  to  the  person  he  least  of  all  wished  to 
meet  just  then. 

It  was  his  senior  officer,  a  major  who  presided 
at  military  examinations. 

At  the  same  moment  a  whisper  passed  through 
the  crowd. 

They  were  recognised !  He  stood  there  as 
though  naked  among  nettles.  His  neck  swelled 
so  unnaturally  and  grew  so  red  that  his  cheeks 
seemed  to  form  part  of  it.  He  could  not  under- 
stand how  people's  looks  could  have  the  effect 
of  gun-bullets.  He  was  literally  fusilladed  and 
collapsed.  His  companion  vanished  from  his 
mind;  he  could  only  think  of  the  major  and  the 
military  examination  which  might  destroy  his 
future. 

But  she  had  seen  and  understood;  she  turned 
her  back  on  everyone  and  went  out.  She  got  into 
the  wrong  coupe  but  it  was  empty.  He  came 
afterwards  and  they  were  alone  at  last. 

"  That's  a  nice  business,  isn't  it?"  he  hissed, 
striking  his  forehead.  "  To  think  of  my  letting 


58    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

myself  be  enticed  into  such  an  adventure !    And 
the  major  too  !    Now  my  career  is  at  an  end !  " 

That  was  the  theme  which  was  enlarged  on 
with  variations  till  Linkoping.  Hunger  and 
thirst  both  contributed  their  part  to  it.  It  was 
terrible. 

After  Linkoping  they  both  felt  that  the  mutual 
reproaches  they  had  hitherto  held  back  must  find 
a  vent.  But  just  at  the  right  moment  they  remem- 
bered her  husband  and  attacked  him.  It  was  his 
fault;  he  was  the  tyrant,  the  idiot  of  course,  "  a 
fellow  who  played  Wagner,"  a  devil.  It  was 
he  who  had  given  the  major  a  hint,  no  doubt. 

'  Yes,  I  believe  you,"  said  she  with  the  firmest 
conviction. 

•"  Do  you?  I  know  it,"  answered  the  baron. 
"  They  meet  on  the  Stock  Exchange,  where  they 
speculate  in  shares  together.  And  do  you  know 
what  I  begin  to  suspect?  Your  husband,  the 
c  wretch  '  as  we  call  him,  has  never  loved  you." 

The  wife  considered  a  moment.  Whether  it 
was  that  her  husband's  love  was  indubitable,  or 
that  it  was  necessary  to  suppose  that  he  loved  her, 
if  she  was  to  have  the  honour  of  having  made  a 
fool  of  him — enough,  he  must  have  loved  her, 
since  she  was  so  lovable. 

"No!  now  you  are  unjust,"  she  ventured  to 
say.  She  felt  herself  somewhat  elevated  by  being 


FAIR  HAVEN  AND  FOUL  STRAND   59 

able  to  speak  a  good  word  of  an  enemy,  but  the 
baron  took  it  as  a  reproach  against  himself  and 
recommenced. 

'  He  loved  you?  He  who  shut  you  up  and 
would  not  accompany  you  to  the  riding-school ! 
He " 

The  safety-conductor  seemed  used  up,  and 
threatened  to  deflect  the  lightning  to  one  side  in 
a  dangerous  way.  So  they  took  up  a  new  thread 
of  conversation — the  question  of  food.  Since  this 
could  not  be  settled  before  Naujo,  which  was 
still  half  a  day  distant,  they  soon  dropped  it 
again.  In  her  extremity,  and  carried  away  by 
a  torrent  of  thoughts  and  emotions  which  she 
could  not  resist,  she  hazarded  a  conjecture  as  to 
how  her  child  was.  To  this  his  answer  was  a  yawn 
which  split  his  face  like  a  red  apple  to  the  uvula 
where  some  dark  molars  resembled  the  core  of  it. 
Gradually  he  let  himself  slide  down  into  a  reclin- 
ing attitude  on  the  sofa,  but  remembering  that 
he  ought  to  make  some  apology  for  his  unseemly 
behaviour,  he  yawned  and  said:  "Excuse  me, 
but  I  am  so  sleepy.'* 

Immediately  afterwards  he  went  to  sleep,  and 
after  a  time  he  snored.  Since  she  was  no  longer 
under  the  influence  of  his  looks  and  words,  she 
could  reflect  quietly  again,  see  who  her  travel- 
ling companion  was,  and  began,  involuntarily, 


60    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

to  institute  comparisons.  Her  husband  had  never 
behaved  like  this ;  he  was  refined  compared  with 
the  baron,  and  was  always  well-dressed. 

The  baron,  who  had  drunk  much  punch  the 
day  before,  began  now  to  perspire  and  smelt  of 
vinegar.  Besides  that,  he  always  had  a  stable- 
like  smell  about  him. 

She  went  out  into  the  corridor,  opened  a 
window,  and  as  though  released  from  enchant- 
ment, she  saw  the  whole  extent  of  her  loss  and 
the  terrible  nature  of  her  position.  As  the  spring 
landscape  swept  past,  a  little  lake  with  willows 
and  a  cottage,  she  remembered  vividly  how  she 
had  dreamt  of  a  summer  holiday  with  the  child. 
Then  she  broke  into  weeping,  and  tried  to  throw 
herself  out  but  was  held  back.  She  remained 
standing  a  long  time,  and  stamped  with  her  feet 
as  though  she  wished  to  stop  the  train  and  make 
it  go  backwards.  All  the  time  she  heard  his 
snoring,  like  grunts  from  a  pigsty  at  feeding- 
time.  And  for  this  .  .  .  creature,  she  had  left 
a  good  home,  a  beautiful  child,  and  a  husband. 

The  snoring  ceased,  and  the  baron  began  to 
employ  his  recuperated  thinking  faculties  in  con- 
sidering the  situation  and  settling  his  future.  He 
did  not  know  how  to  be  sad;  instead  of  that  he 
became  angry.  When  he  saw  her  holding  her 
handkerchief  to  her  eyes,  he  got  in  a  rage,  and 


FAIR    HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND      61 

took  it  as  a  personal  reproach.  But  quarrelling 
was  tedious  and  unpleasant ;  therefore  assuming 
a  light  tone,  and  caressing  her  as  one  might 
a  horse,  he  clicked  with  his  tongue  and  said : 
"Cheer  up,  Maja!  " 

Two  such  opposite  moods,  in  colliding,  cut  each 
other  and  each  fell  on  its  own  side  of  the  knife. 
A  dead  silence  was  the  result.  They  were  no 
longer  one  person,  but  two,  irrevocably  two,  who 
did  not  belong  together. 

Yet  another  half -day  in  wretchedness  and  bore- 
dom; a  night  with  changes  of  train  in  the  dark- 
ness, and  at  last  they  were  in  Copenhagen.  There 
they  were  unknown  and  had  no  need  to  feel 
embarrassed.  But  when  they  entered  the  dining- 
saloon,  she  began  to  pass  the  "  searchlight  "  of 
her  looks,  as  he  called  it,  over  all  those  present, 
so  that  when  the  baron  looked  at  her  he  never 
saw  her  eye  except  in  profile.  At  last  he  became 
angry  and  kicked  her  shin  under  the  table.  Then 
she  turned  away  and  appealed  with  her  eyes  to 
the  company.  She  could  not  look  at  him — so 
hateful  did  he  seem  to  her.  Upstairs  in  their 
room  the  corks  were  drawn  out.  They  reached 
the  stage  of  recriminations.  His  spoilt  career 
was  her  fault  .  .  .  she  had  lost  her  child  and 
home  through  him.  So  it  went  on  till  past  mid- 
night when  sleep  had  mercy  on  them: 


62    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

Then  next  morning  they  sat  at  the  breakfast- 
table,  silent  and  ghastly  to  look  at.  She 
remembered  her  honeymoon  journey  and  very 
much  the  same  situation.  They  had  nothing  to 
say  to  each  other,  and  he  was  as  tedious  as  her 
husband  had  been.  They  kept  silence  and  were 
ashamed  of  being  in  each  other's  presence. 
They  were  conscious  of  their  mutual  hatred,  and 
poisoned  each  other  with  nerve-poison. 

At  last  the  deliverer  came.  The  waiter 
approached  with  a  telegram  for  the  baron,  who 
opened  and  read  it  at  a  glance.  He  seemed  to 
consider,  cast  a  calculating  glance  at  his  enemy, 
and  after  a  pause  said  :  "I  am  recalled  by  the 
commanding  officer." 

"  And  mean  to  leave  me  here?  '' 

He  changed  his  resolve  in  a  second  :  ' '  No,  we 
will  travel  back  together."  A  plan  suggested 
itself  and  he  told  her  of  it.  "  We  will  sail  across 
to  Landskrona ;  there  no  one  knows  you,  and  you 
can  wait  for  me." 

The  idea  of  sailing  had  a  smack  of  the 
adventurous  and  heroic  about  it,  and  this  trifle 
outweighed  all  other  considerations.  She  was 
kindled,  kindled  him,  and  they  packed  at  once. 
The  prospect  of  leaving  her,  for  however  short 
a  time,  restored  his  courage. 

Accordingly,  some  hours  later,  he  took  his 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND      63 

in  a  hired  sailing-boat  with  his  beloved  by  the 
foresail  and  put  off  from  Lange  Linie  like  a  sea- 
robber  with  his  bride,  blustering,  ostentatious 
and  gorgeous. 

In  order  to  conceal  his  plan  he  had  only  spoken 
to  the  owner  of  the  boat  of  a  pleasure-trip  in  the 
Sound.  His  intention  was  to  telegraph  from 
Landskrona  and  send  the  money  due  for  the  boat 
and  have  the  boat  itself  towed  by  a  steamer. 

As  they  were  putting  off  from  shore,  the  boat 
owner  stood  near  and  watched  them.  But  when 
he  saw  that  they  were  directing  their  course  to 
the  Island  Hven,  he  put  his  hands  to  his  mouth 
and  shouted:  "Don't  go  too  near  Hven/'  and 
something  else  which  was  carried  away  by  the 
wind. 

"  Why  not  Hven?"  asked  the  baron  aloud. 
'  The  shore  is  steep,  so  that  there  are  no  rocks 
under  water." 

'  Yes,  but  if  he  tells  us  so,  he  must  have  had 
some  reason  for  it,"  she  objected. 

"Don't  talk  nonsense!  Look  after  the  fore- 
sail!" 

The  wind  blew  a  light  gale  on  the  open  sea, 
and  since  there  was  a  considerable  distance  be- 
tween the  foresail  and  the  stern  there  was  no  need 
for  conversation,  much  to  the  baron's  relief.  ^ 

Their  course  was  directed  towards  the  sputjar 


64    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

east  corner  of  Hven,  though  at  first  not  noticeably 
so.  But  when  she  at  last  saw  whither  they  were 
going,  she  called  out :  "  Don't  steer  for  Hven !  ' 

'  *  Hold  your ! ' '  answered  the  baron  and 

tacked. 

After  an  hour's  good  run  they  had  come 
abreast  of  the  white  island  and  a  light  pressure 
on  the  rudder  turned  the  boat's  prow  towards 
Landskrona,  which  appeared  in  the  north. 

"Saved !  "  cried  the  steersman  and  lit  a  cigar. 

At  the  same  instant  a  little  steamer  put  out 
from  Hven  and  made  straight  for  the  sailing- 
boat. 

"  What  is  that  steamer?  "  she  asked. 

"  It  is  a  custom-house  boat,"  answered  the 
baron  who  was  at  home  on  the  sea. 

But  now  the  steamer  hoisted  a  yellow  flag  and 
whistled. 

"  That  has  nothing  to  do  with  us,"  said  the 
baron,  and  kept  on  his  course. 

But  the  steamer  took  a  sweep  round,  signalled 
with  the  flag,  and  let  off  several  short,  sharp 
whistles  like  cries  of  distress,  increasing  speed 
at  the  same  time.  Then  the  baron  jumped  up 
wildly  at  the  stern  as  though  he  intended  plunging 
into  the  sea.  He  remembered  the  outbreak  of 
cholera  at  Hamburg  and  cried  :  "  It  is  the  quaran- 
tine !  Three  days !  We  are  lost !  ' 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      65 

The  next  moment  he  sat  down  again  in  his 
place,  hauling  taut  the  main-sheet  and  drifting 
before  the  wind,  straight  towards  the  Sound. 
The  chase  began,  but  soon  the  steamer  stood 
athwart  the  bow  of  the  sailing-boat,  which  was 
captured. 

The  whole  carefully-thought-out  device  of  the 
baron  to  avoid  the  gaze  of  curious  eyes  was  de- 
feated, and  as  their  sailing-boat  was  towed  into 
the  harbour  of  Hven,  the  unhappy  pair  were 
saluted  from  the  bridge  by  hundreds  of  their 
fellow-countrymen  with  derisive  applause  and 
peals  of  laughter,  though  the  latter  did  not  know 
whom  they  were  applauding.  But  the  chagrin  of 
the  captured  pair  was  greater  than  the  others 
guessed,  for  they  believed  that  people  were  ridi- 
culing their  unfortunate  love  affair. 

To  make  matters  worse  the  baron  had 
unpardonably  insulted  the  quarantine  doctor  by 
upbraiding  him  on  board  the  steamer.  Therefore 
no  special  consideration  was  shown  them,  but 
they  were  treated  like  all  others  who  come  from 
a  cholera-infected  port.  Since  their  incognito 
was  bound  to  be  seen  through  sooner  or  later, 
they  went  about  in  perpetual  fear  of  discovery. 
Full  of  suspicion,  they  believed  every  other  hour 
that  they  were  recognised. 

No  one  would  have  the  patience  to  read  the 

E 


66      FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND 

story  of  the  torture  of  those  three  days.  So  much 
is  known,  that  the  first  day  she  spent  in  weeping 
for  her  child,  while  he  walked  about  the  island. 
The  second  day  she  enlarged  upon  the  excellent 
qualities  of  her  husband  as  contrasted  with  the 
execrable  ones  of  her  lover.  On  the  third  day 
she  cursed  him  for  having  taken  her  away,  and 
when  she  ended  by  calling  him  an  idiot  for  not 
having  obeyed  her  own  and  the  boat-owner's 
advice  to  avoid  Hven,  he  gave  her  a  box  on  the 
ear.  ...  On  the  fourth  day  when  they  were 
really  discovered,  and  newspapers  arrived  with 
the  whole  story,  they  went  into  a  crevice  in  the 
rocks  to  hide  their  shame. 

When  at  last  two  steamers  came  to  fetch  the 
unfortunates,  each  went  on  board  a  different  one. 
And  after  that  day  they  never  saw  nor  knew  each 
other  again. 

It  was  nearly  midnight  when  the  reading  was 
ended.  An  interval  of  silence  followed,  but  the 
postmaster  felt  he  must  say  something.  '  One 
generally  says  '  thanks  !  "  he  remarked.  "  Mean- 
while, after  you  have  said  all,  there  is  not 
much  to  add :  I  will  only  ask  myself,  you, 
and  everyone  a  general  question :  '  What  is 
love?  '  " 

"What  is  love?    Answer:   'I  don't  know.' 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      67 

Love  has  been  called  a  piece  of  roguery  on  the 
part  of  Nature.  I  don't  believe  that,  for  I  know 
that  Nature  has  neither  made  itself  nor  can  it 
think  out  pieces  of  roguery.  But  if  we  accept 
that  proposition,  we  descend  to  zoology,  and  that 
I  do  not  wish  to  do.  I  do  not  share  the  theo- 
retical veneration  for  woman  which  my  con- 
temporaries cherish;  on  the  other  hand,  I 
instinctively  place  her  higher  than  ourselves.  She 
seems  to  me  to  be  formed  out  of  finer  material 
than  we  men,  but  I  may  be  wrong,  for  she  seems 
to  be  furnished  with  more  animal  functions  than 
we  are.  If  I  were  a  theosophist,  I  should  believe 
she  was  only  a  kind  of  intermediary  chrysalis  stage 
on  the  way  to  man,  only  a  temporary  manifes- 
tation,*out  of  which  love,  i.e.  man's  love,  creates 
in.  her  possibilities  of  being  and  seeming.  When 
he  finds  this  really  lifeless  form  of  existence  and 
breathes  his  immortal  breath  into  it,  he  shares 
the  Creator's  joy  on  the  seventh  day.  The 
process  of  refining,  which  his  coarser  substance 
hindered  him  bringing  about  in  his  own  soul,  he 
brings  about  in  hers,  and  through  reaction — no  ! 
it  is  too  difficult  for  me  to  explain;  it  is  like 
dividing  an  angle  into  three  equal  parts.  Anyhow, 
the  fact  is  certain,  and  my  story  is  an  illustration 
of  it,  that  when  a  man  is  deceived  in  his  love  as 
he  always  is,  his  whole  being  revolts  against  the 


68    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

government  of  the  world,  which  seems  to  him 
to  have  condescended  to  mock  at  his  holiest 
possession,  the  holiest  thing  in  all  creation.  If 
Providence  is  consonant  with  such  deceit  and 
such  coarse  jesting  then  he  discovers  a  devil  where 
he  thought  he  had  seen  a  good  angel.  After  that 
what  shall  he  trust,  what  shall  he  value,  at  what 
shall  he  not  make  a  grimace?  And  when  after 
marriage  the  veil  falls,  and  like  Adam  and  Eve 
they  are  naked  and  ashamed,  then  even  the  most 
unbelieving  is  conscious  of  something  resembling 
the  Fall.  Then  comes  a  fresh  error  and  they 
think  they  have  deceived  each  other,  which  they 
have  not  done.  So  they  scourge  each  other  for 
crimes  which  neither  has  committed.  A  second 
deception  follows  the  first." 

They  were  again  silent.  Then  the  postmaster 
gave  the  conversation  another  turn  and  de- 
scended to  the  earth.  "  You  can  guess  that  I,  at 
any  rate,  recognise  the  lady  of  your  story.  She 
lives  in  her  own  little  house,  here  on  the  island  by 
the  shore." 

' '  Yes  she  does !  I  know  her,  and  I  was 
quarantine  doctor  at  Hven  when  she  was  cap- 
tured. Now  that  she  is  elderly  she  has  renewed 
her  acquaintance  with  me,  and  it  is  from  her  own 
mouth  that  I  heard  the  story.  She  has  been  in 
love  countless  times1,  and  declares  that  every  time 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      69 

she  believed  she  had  found  the  right  man  who  had 
been  predestined  for  her  from  the  foundation  of 
the  world." 

'  Does  not  reason  feel  its  helplessness  before 
such  riddles,  riddles  of  every  day?  ': 

'  Yes  and  therefore  .  .  .  yes,  next  Saturday 
you  shall  hear  another  story,  and  I  think  we 
shall  approach  the  riddle  a  little  more  closely, 
i.e.  we  shall  find  its  insolubility  more  strongly 
proved." 

'  I  shall  be  glad  to  hear  it.  But  why  don't 
you  have  your  stories  printed  ?  ' 

"  Because  I  have  been  a  doctor,  and  a  woman's 
doctor.  I  have  no  right  to  reveal  what  I  have 
heard  in  my  official  capacity.  Sometimes  I 
should  like  to  be  a  writer  with  a  prescriptive 
right  to  find  material  for  his  art  in  men's  lives  and 
destinies;  but  that  is  a  calling  and  a  task  which 
is  denied  to  me." 

'  Very  well;  good  night  till  next  Saturday." 
When  Saturday  evening  came  round,  the  two 
old  men  sat  in  the  corner  room  with  their  toddy 
and  tobacco  and  a  large  pile  of  manuscript  on 
the  table.  The  postmaster  looked  a  little  ner- 
vously at  it,  as  a  child  might  at  a  family  book  of 
sermons. 

"We  can  give  two  evenings  to  it,"  said  the 
doctor  soothingly. 


70    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STEAND 

' '  Ah  no  !  we  have  the  whole  evening  before  us 
and  to-morrow  is  Sunday.  Fire  ahead  !  We  will 
have  an  interval  for  refreshments." 

The  doctor  began  to  read  at  six  o'clock  and 
had  finished  when  it  struck  eleven. 


THE  DOCTOR'S  SECOND 
STORY 


HE  had  left  his  Christiania  full  of  bitterness 
because  a  public  injustice  had  been  done  him. 
At  forty  years  of  age  he  had  written  the  best 
modern  drama  and  had  invented  a  new  form  of 
play  with  a  new  plot  which  answered  the  expecta- 
tions of  the  generation  which  was  growing  up. 
But  the  older  generation  was  still  alive,  and 
spectators,  actors,  and  critics  felt  that  their 
ideals  were  leaving  them  in  the  lurch,  and  that 
they  themselves  would  be  involved  in  their  fall. 
If  the  public  taste  took  a  new  direction  which 
they  could  not  follow,  they  would  be  regarded  as 
superannuated,  and  be  left  behind.  Accordingly 
his  masterpiece  had  been  called  idiotic  and  had 
been  hissed  off  the  stage,  and  it  had  been  sug- 
gested to  him  that  he  should  return  to  America, 
where  he  had  already  been  and  left  his  wife, 
from  whom  he  was  separated. 

But,  instead  of  going  to  America,  he  went  to 
Copenhagen.    In  the  centre  of  the  city  he  set  up 

a  restaurant  where  he  foregathered  with  Swedes 

73 


74    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

and  Finns.  After  some  months'  delay  he  suc- 
ceeded in  getting  his  drama  performed  at  a 
Copenhagen  theatre.  It  was  decidedly  successful 
and  his  reputation  was  saved.  He  had  felt  that 
he  had  done  with  life,  but  now  he  began  to  wake 
up  and  to  look  about  him.  But  when  he  did  enter 
into  life  again,  he  did  so  with  dull  resignation  and 
an  almost  fatalistic  spirit  which  found  expression 
in  his  favourite  motto:  ''Prepared  for  every- 
thing!"- 

His  dramatic  success  resulted  in  his  receiving 
social  invitations.  One  evening  he  went  to  a 
soiree  at  a  distinguished  author's,  round  whom 
the  younger  stars  in  art  and  literature  were  accus- 
tomed to  gather.  The  supper  was  long  and 
brilliant,  but  several  unoccupied  places  were 
waiting  for  guests  who  should  arrive  after  the 
theatres  had  closed.  At  half -past  ten  there  was 
a  stir  in  the  company,  for  the  expected  guests 
came — three  ladies  and  three  men  all  unknown 
to  the  Norwegian.  But  one  of  the  three  ladies 
greeted  him  as  an  acquaintance  and  reached  the 
stranger  her  hand.  Immediately  afterwards  he 
asked  the  hostess  in  a  whisper  who  it  was. 

' '  Who  is  it  ?  Miss  X of  course  !  You 

talked  with  her  at  Doctor  E 's  supper." 

' '  Really !  It  is  strange  that  with  my  good 
memory  I  cannot  recall  her  appearance.  One 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      75 

evening  lately,  in  a  well-lit  theatre  lobby,  I  passed 
her  without  a  greeting." 

"  Of  course  you  don't  see  that  she  is  pretty." 

' '  Is  she  ?  "  He  leant  forward  to  look  at  the 
young  lady  who  had  taken  her  seat  far,  down  the 
table.  "  Yes  she  doesn't  look  bad." 

; '  Fie !  Fie !  She  is  a  celebrated  beauty  of  the 
best  Copenhagen  type." 

'  Oh !  Formerly  I  only  admired  blondes  but 
latterly  have  confined  my  admiration  to  brun- 
ettes . ' '  Then  they  talked  of  something  else .  After 
supper  the  company  gathered  in  the  drawing- 
room  and  the  beautiful  Dane  and  the  Norwegian 
sat  so  close  together  that  he  put  her  cup  down 
for  her.  When  she  asked  who  would  escort  her 
home,  he  answered:  "  I  of  course,"  and  his 
escort  was  accepted.  When  at  last  the  company 
broke  up,  he  and  she  found  themselves  in  the 
same  mysterious  way  so  deep  in  conversation  that 
a  group  of  ladies  and  gentlemen  formed  a  circle 
round  them  with  a  mischievous  air  to  watch  them. 
The  pair,  however,  did  not  observe  this,  but 
continued  to  talk.  As  they  went  down  the  steps 
they  heard  a  ' '  good  night ! ' '  and  a  ringing 
laugh  overhead  from  the  young  and  charming 
hostess  who  was  leaning  over  the  balcony-railing. 
They  went  along  the  shore,  and  past  the  bridges, 
continuing  their;  conversation  without  a  pause. 


76    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

When  they  came  to  X Street  she  invited  him 

to  supper  the  following  evening  to  meet  a  young 
female  artist.  But  she  prepared  him  to  find  her 
surroundings  very  simple,  as  she  was  staying  in 
a  pension  kept  by  a  strict  old  lady.  Then  they 
parted  as  though  they  had  been  old  acquaintances 
and  colleagues. 

As  he  walked  home  alone  through  the  night, 
and  tried  to  recall  the  events  of  the  evening  to  his 
mind,  he  noticed  again  the  curious  fact  that  he 
could  not  remember  her  appearance.     Yet  as  a 
former  reporter,  he  had  been  so  accustomed  to 
photograph  people  and  scenes,  landscapes  and 
interiors  with  his  eye  that  he  could  not  under- 
stand it.     Moreover,  he  observed  that  she  was 
quite  a  different  person  this  evening  to  what  she 
had  been  the  first  time  they  met.    There  was  now 
no  trace  of  "  independence  "  about  her,  only  a 
mild  yieldingness,   a  certain  melancholy,  which 
became     her     well    and     aroused     sympathy. 
When  they  talked  of  the  unfortunate  fate  of  a 
certain  person,  there  were  tears  in  her  voice. 
It  was  the  voice  which  he  remembered  more  than 
anything  else   about  her — somewhat  deep   and 
melancholy  with  a  slight  accent  which  carried 
one  far  away  from  the  great  town  and  awoke 
memories  of  wood  and  sea,  the  sounds  of  nature, 
shepherds'  huts,  and  hay-rakes.    He  now  recol- 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      77 

lected  how  they  had  really  treated  her  like  a 
child  the  previous  evening,  had  teased  her  about 
her  writings,  and  asked  her  for  recommendations, 
at  which  she  had  only  smiled.  She  also  had  the 
unfortunate  habit  of  letting  fall  naive  expressions, 
which  were  really  seriously  meant,  but  some- 
times had  a  repellent  effect. 

The  only  one  who  had  taken  her  seriously  was 
himself,  the  foreigner.  And  he  had  seen  that  she 
was  no  child  but  a  woman  with  whom  he  could 
speak  of  men  and  books  and  all  that  interested 
him,  without  once  having  to  explain  his  remarks. 

When  he  awoke  the  next  morning,  he  tried  to 
call  to  his  mind  the  events  and  persons  of  the 
previous  day.  It  was  his  habit,  when  he  made 
a  new  acquaintance,  to  seek  in  his  memory  for 
the  ' '  corresponding  number, "  as  he  called  it, 
in  order  to  get  a  clear  idea  of  his  character;  i.e. 
he  thought  which  of  his  old  friends  most  nearly 
resembled  the  person  in  question.  This  psy- 
chical operation  was  often  performed  involun- 
tarily, i.e.  when  he  tried  to  call  up  the  image  of 
his  new  acquaintance,  the  figure  of  an  old  one 
rose  up  in  his  mind  and  more  or  less  obliterated 
the  latter.  When  he  now  recalled  his  yesterday's 

memories  of  Miss  X he  saw  her  with  an 

elderly  married  cousin,  to  whom  he  had  always 
felt  indifferent.    This  suppressed  any  sentimental 


78    FAIE   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

feeling,  if  any  were  present,  and  he  only  thought 
of  her  as  a  kindly  woman-friend.  Accordingly, 
in  the  evening,  he  felt  perfectly  calm  and  without 
a  trace  of  that  embarrassment  which  one  some- 
times feels  in  attempting  to  make  oneself  agree- 
able to  a  young  lady.  He  was  received  with 
perfect  frankness  as  an  old  acquaintance  and  led 
into  a  lady's  boudoir  elegantly  furnished  with 
a  well-appointed  writing-table,  flower-plants, 
family  portraits,  carpets,  and  comfortable  chairs. 

Since  the  lady  painter  had  been  prevented 
coming,  he  had  to  be  content  with  a  tete-a-tete, 
and  this  somewhat  jarred  on  his  sense  of  pro- 
priety. But  his  hostess's  simple  and  unaffected 
manner  caused  him  to  suppress  some  remarks 
which  might  have  hurt  her  feelings. 

So  they  sat  opposite  each  other  and  talked. 
Her  black  silk  dress  had  blue  insets  and  was  cut 
in  the  "  empire  style,"  with  dark  lace  trimmings 
which  hung  from  her  shoulders  like  a  sleigh-net. 
This  gave  her  a  somewhat  matronly  appearance, 
and  when  he  noticed  her  tone  like  that  of  an 
experienced  woman  of  the  world,  he  thought  for 
a  moment :  "  She  is  divorced  !  "  Her  face,  which 
he  could  now  examine  in  full  light,  showed  a  flat 
forehead  which  looked  as  though  it  had  been 
hammered  smooth  and  betokened  a  determined 
will  without  obstinacy.  The  eyes  were  large 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      79 

and  well-defined  as  with  Southerners.  The  nose 
seemed  to  have  altered  its  mind  while  growing, 
for  it  took  a  little  bend  in  the  middle  and  became 
Eoman  by  degrees.  This  little  unexpected  "  joy- 
ful surprise  "  lent  a  cameo-like  charm  to  her 
profile. 

Their  conversation  was  still  more  lively  this 
evening,  for  they  had  already  amassed  a  small 
store  of  common  experiences  to  discuss,  acquaint- 
ances to  analyse,  and  ideas  to  test.  They  sat  there 
and  cut  out  silhouettes  of  their  friends,  and  as 
neither  of  them  wished  to  seem  spiteful,  they  cut 
them  in  handsome  shapes,  and  not  with  pointed 
scissors. 

During  this  innocent  interchange  of  thought, 
he  had  glanced  at  a  very  large  flower-basket  full 
of  splendid  roses.  She  had  divined  his  thoughts, 
and  just  as  a  servant  brought  in  a  bottle  of  wine 
and  cigarettes,  she  got  up  and  went  towards  the 
roses. 

("She  is  engaged!'  he  thought  and  felt 
himself  superfluous.) 

"  I  was  given  these  by  a  friend  on  his  depar- 
ture," she  said. 

But  in  order  to  show  that  she  was  not  engaged 
she  broke  off  a  stem  carelessly.  It  was  fastened 
with  wire,  and  she  had  to  look  for  her  scissors. 
As  these  were  in  her  work-basket  on  the  lowest 


80    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

shelf  of  her  work-table,  she  knelt  down  and 
remained  kneeling.  She  remained  in  that  atti- 
tude while  she  fastened  two  of  the  finest  roses 
in  his  buttonhole,  and  she  only  needed  to  stretch 
out  an  arm  to  reach  a  glass  of  wine  and  drink  to 
his  health. 

'  Roses  and  wine ! '  I  have  used  that  as  a 
refrain  for  a  ballad,"  he  said.  He  thought  the 
situation  somewhat  strange  but  insignificant  in 
itself. 

•  "Oh!  do  repeat  the  ballad !" 
He  had  forgotten  it. 

She  rose  up  and  sat  on  her  chair,  and  he  per- 
suaded her  to  tell  him  something  of  her  life.  She 
had  early  left  her  parents,  who  lived  separated 
without  being  divorced,  for  they  were  Catholics. 
She  had  been  educated  in  convent-schools  in 
London,  Paris,  Italy,  and  elsewhere.  In  Paris 
especially,  when  with  English  ladies,  she  had  been 
bothered  with  religion,  but  had  finally  thrown  it 
all  overboard.  She  certainly  felt  an  emptiness 
without  it,  but  expected,  like  everyone  else,  that 
some  new  substitute  was  coming  into  the  world. 
Meanwhile,  like  her  contemporaries,  she  devoted 
her  energies  to  the  deliverance  of  humanity  from 
pauperism  and  oppression.  She  had  superficially 
studied  Nietzsche  among  others  and  laid  him 
aside  again  after  finding  in  him  a  slight  correo 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      81 

tive  to  over-strained  expectations  of  universal 
equality. 

While  she  was  talking,  he  noticed  that  light 
fell  through  a  curtain  behind  her  back,  which 
screened  a  door  apparently  leading  into  the 
interior  of  the  house.  Like  lightning  the  thought 
struck  him  that  he  might  be  the  object  of  a  joke, 
and  was  to  be  surprised  in  the  ridiculous  position 
of  a  woman-worshipper.  Or  perhaps  it  was  only 
for  propriety's  sake  that  communication  was  kept 
open  with  the  main  building.  This  wholesome 
doubt  kept  their  conversation  free  from  all 
tincture  of  flirtation,  and  when  supper  was  served 
he  reproached  himself  for  having  suspected 
his  hostess  of  evil  purposes  or  a  want  of  trust  in 
him. 

About  half-past  eight  he  was  about  to  go,  but 
she  only  needed  to  express  a  suspicion  that  he 
was  longing  for  the  cafe  to  make  him  remain. 
About  half -past  nine  o'clock  he  was  going  again 
but  was  kept  back. 

"  But,"  he  remonstrated,  "it  is  my  part  as 
the  elder  and  more  prudent  to  spare  you  any 
unpleasantness." 

She  understood  nothing,  but  declared  that  she 
was  independent  and  that  the  lady  who  kept  the 
pension  was  accustomed  to  her  suppers. 

At  last  his  instinct  told  him  that  it  was  a 

F 


82    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

mistake  to  stay  longer ;  he  rose  and  took  his  leave. 
On  his  way  home,  he  said  to  himself,  "No, 
people  are  not  so  simple,  and  cannot  be  labelled 
by  formulas,  for  I  don't  comprehend  an  atom  of 
this  evening  or  of  this  woman." 

The  next  time  they  met  it  was  in  a  museum. 
Her  outer  dress  made  her  look  like  a  young 
married  woman  of  thirty  or  more.  Her  mouth 
had  a  tired  expression  and  had  fine  little  wrinkles 
near  it,  as  is  the  case  with  those  who  laugh  often. 
But  she  was  melancholy,  hinted  at  having  had  a 
breach  with  her  father,  and  spoke  of  taking  her 
departure  shortly.  She  inquired  regarding  her 
friend's  relations  to  theatres  and  publishers,  and 
offered  to  help  him  with  advice  and  influence. 
To-day  she  was  mere  motherly  tenderness,  and 
a  certain  carelessness  in  her  toilet  suggested  that 
she  did  not  want  to  please  as  a  woman. 

But  when  she  proposed  that  they  should  go  to 
the  theatre  together  he  declined,  from  a  feeling 
that  he  ought  not  to  compromise  her,  nor  expose 
himself  to  danger,  for  his  precarious  pecuniary 
position  did  not  permit  him  to  think  of  a  love 
affair. 

He  proposed  to  her  instead  that  they  should 
go  for  a  stroll  together,  and  she  suggested  that  he 
should  escort  her  from  her  new  lodging,  for  she 
had  changed  her  rooms. 


FATE    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      83 

("  They  have  given  her  notice  at  the  pen- 
sion, because  of  me,"  he  thought,  but  said 
nothing.) 

By  this  time  his  curiosity  as  an  author  was 
aroused,  and  he  wished  to  learn  the  riddle  of  this 
woman,  for  he  had  never  seen  any  other  change 
their  appearance  as  she  did. 

When  in  the  evening  he  rang  at  her  door,  he 
was  shown  into  a  side  room  and  asked  to  wait. 
When  she  was  dressed  he  was  let  out  into  the 
front  hall,  where  they  met.  This,  then,  was  a 
new  order  of  things. 

They  went  westward  by  an  empty  street  which 
led  to  the  Zoological  Gardens,  and  entered  a  res- 
taurant which  she  seemed  to  know  well.  In  her 
fur  jacket  and  with  a  kerchief  on  her  head  she 
looked  in  the  dark  like  an  old  woman,  and  as  she 
stooped  somewhat,  she  seemed  to  have  some- 
thing witchlike  about  her.  But  when  they  entered 
the  well-lit  restaurant,  and  she  laid  aside  kerchief 
and  jacket  she  stood  revealed  all  at  once  in  her 
youthful  beauty.  A  moss-green,  tightly  fitting 
dress  showed  the  figure  of  a  girl  of  eighteen,  and 
with  her  hair  brushed  smooth,  she  looked  like 
an  overgrown  schoolgirl.  He  could  not  conceal 
his  astonishment  at  this  witchery,  and  looked  her 
all  over  as  though  he  were  seeking  a  concealed 
enemy  with  a  searchlight.  ("  Eros !  Now  I  am 


84    FAIR  HAVEN  AND    FOUL    STRAND 

lost!  "  he  thought.     And  from  that  moment  he 
was  indeed.) 

She  saw  quite  well  the  effect  she  had  produced, 
and  seemed  to  glisten  there  in  a  sort  of  phosphor- 
escent light,  sure  of  victory,  with  a  triumphant 
expression  round  her  mouth,  for  she  saw  that  he 
was  conquered.  He  felt  a  sudden  fear.  She  had 
his  soul  in  her  pocket,  and  could  cast  it  into  the 
river  or  into  the  gutter;  therefore  he  hated  her 
at  the  same  time.  He  saw  that  his  only  chance 
of  safety  lay  in  awakening  a  reciprocal  flame  in 
her,  so  that  she  might  be  as  closely  bound  to  him 
as  he  was  to  her.  With  this  half -conscious  pur- 
pose, he  did  what  every  man  in  his  place  would 
have  done — insinuated  himself  into  her  confi- 
dence, made  himself  as  little  as  a  child  and 
aroused  her  sympathy,  the  sympathy  of  a  woman 
for  a  lacerated  and  damned  soul  which  has  no 
more  hope  of  happiness.  She  listened  to  him  and 
received  his  confidence  as  a  tribute,  with  calm 
majestic  motherliness,  without  a  trace  of  coquetry 
or  pleasure  at  hearing  of  another's  misfortune. 

When  at  last,  after  eating  a  cold  supper,  they 
were  about  to  go,  he  rose  to  look  up  a  train  in  a 
railway  guide.  When  he  returned  to  the  table 
and  wished  to  pay  the  bill,  the  waiter  informed 
him  that  it  had  already  been  paid  by  the  lady ! 
Then  he  flared  up,  and  wrongly  suspecting  that 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      85 

she  thought  he  had  no  money,  demanded  that  at 
any  rate  he  should  pay  for  himself. 

"  I  don't  know  the  customs  of  your  country," 
he  said,  ' '  but  in  mine  a  man  who  lets  a  lady  pay 
for  him  is  dishonoured." 

'  You  were  my  guest,"  she  answered. 

"No,  we  went  out  together,  and  we  cannot 
come  here  again.  Don't  you  know  what  kind  of 
a  reputation  you  will  give  me,  and  by  what  a  hate- 
ful name  this  waiter  may  call  me  ?  " 

When  he  recalled  the  waiter  to  make  good  the 
mistake,  there  was  another  scene,  so  that  he  rose 
angrily  and  laid  his  share  on  the  table.  She  was 
sad,  but  wrould  not  acknowledge  herself  in  the 
wrong.  They  were  both  out  of  humour,  and  he 
noticed  that  she  was  thoughtless,  just  as  thought- 
less as  when  she  invited  a  gentleman  alone  to  her 
room  so  late  in  the  evening.  Or  was  it  an  expres- 
sion of  feminine  independence  demanding  to  be 
treated  exactly  like  a  man  in  spite  of  propriety 
and  prejudice  ?  Perhaps  it  was  the  latter,  but  he 
fell  it  to  be  a  piece  of  presumption,  and  was 
angry.  There  threatened  to  be  an  uncomfortable 
silence  between  them  as  they  walked  home,  but 
she  put  out  her  hand  and  said  in  a  kind,  confi- 
dential voice  :  "  Don't  be  cross." 

; '  No  I  am  not  that,  but,  but  .  .  .  never  do  it 
again." 


86    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

They  parted  as  friends,  and  he  hurried  to  the 
cafe.  He  had  not  been  there  for  a  long  time, 
partly  through  a  certain  dislike  to  the  tone  pre- 
vailing there,  which  no  longer  harmonised  with 
his  present  mood,  and  partly  because  he  had 
promised  his  friend  to  be  moderate.  He  found 
the  usual  company,  but  felt  somewhat  out  of 
place,  and  made  a  clear  resolve  never  to  bring 
her  there.  Accordingly,  he  soon  went  home  and 
sank  in  meditations  which  were  partly  gloomy 
and  partly  bright.  When  he  recollected  the  mo- 
ment of  emergence  of  the  youthful  beauty  from 
the  fur  skin  of  the  animal  there  seemed  to  him 
something  weird  and  ominous  about  it.  It  was 
not  the  youthful  beauty  which  is  clothed  in  reflec- 
tions from  a  paradise  of  innocence,  but  a  dark, 
demoniac  beauty  which  becomes  a  man's  death, 
the  grave  of  his  virile  will,  and  which  leads  to 
humiliation,  ruin,  and  disgraceful  bargaining. 
But  it  is  as  inevitable  and  unescapable  as 
Fate. 

The  next  day  he  was  invited,  together  with 
her,  to  dinner  at  an  art  professor's.  She  then 
appeared  in  a  new  character,  talking  like  a 
woman  of  the  world  in  a  confident  tone,  firing 
off  smart  sayings  and  epigrams  and  never  at  a 
loss  for  an  answer.  At  intervals  she  seemed 
indifferent,  blase,  and  cruel. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND      87 

The  professor,  who  had  just  been  sitting  on  a 
jury,  told  us  that  he  had  joined  in  giving  a  verdict 
of  guilty  against  a  child  murderess. 

"I  should  have  acquitted  her,"  said  Miss 

X .  The  professor,  who  belonged  to  the 

Danish  Academy  and  had  the  entree  to  the  Court, 
was  astonished,  but  did  not  argue  with  her.  He 
construed  her  answer  as  a  burst  of  caprice  and  let 
the  matter  drop.  The  conversation  at  table  was 
somewhat  forced.  The  Norwegian,  who  had  been 
invited  by  the  lady  of  the  house,  did  not  feel  at 
ease  in  this  circle  where  everything  revolved 
round  the  Court.  Probably  his  friend  had 
arranged  this  invitation  with  the  kind  intention 
of  making  him  known  and  of  investing  him,  who 
had  the  reputation  of  being  half  an  anarchist, 
with  an  air  of  gentility.  The  discord  was  felt  when 
the  talk  turned  upon  Art,  and  the  professor 
was  in  a  minority  of  one  with  his  opinions  and 
academic  ideals. 

Therefore,  when  at  dessert  time  his  hostess 
asked  the  Norwegian  whether  he  would  come  to 
one  of  her  receptions,  where  he  would  have  the 
opportunity  of  meeting  many  celebrities,  she 
received  such  a  sharp  look  from  her  husband, 
that  the  Norwegian  declined  the  invitation 
decidedly.  Just  then  the  Scandinavians  were  in 
ill  favour  in  the  higher  circles  of  society  because 


a  Norwegian  artist  by  his  new  style  of  painting 
had  caused  a  schism  in  the  Academy. 

Again  he  had  let  himself  be  enticed  by  his 
friend's  thoughtlessness.  She  had  brought  him 
into  a  circle  to  which  he  did  not  belong  and  in 
which  he  was  not  welcome.  On  the  other  hand 
she  seemed  to  notice  nothing  of  it,  but  was  as 
much  at  home  and  at  her  ease  as  before. 

After  dinner  there  was  music.  The  young 
beauty  behaved  as  though  her  friend  was  not 
there  and  never  looked  at  him  at  all.  When  the 
party  broke  up,  she  took  leave  of  him  as  though 
of  a  stranger,  and  let  herself  be  escorted  home 
by  someone  else. 


n 

It  was  a  Sunday  afternoon  in  February.  They 
were  walking  in  one  of  the  outer  streets  of  the 
city  towards  the  west,  where  they  were  sure  to 
meet  no  acquaintances.  Finally  they  entered  a 
restaurant  which  lay  off  the  road.  She  spoke  of 
her  approaching  departure,  and  he  said  he  would 
miss  her  society. 

"  Come  along  too,"  she  said  simply  and 
openly. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      89 

' '  Yes,"  he  answered,  "  it  is  really  all  the  same 
to  me  where  I  stay." 

That  was  an  idea  which  seemed  to  drive  away 
certain  clouds.  She  now  began  to  speak  of 
Berlin,  the  theatrical  prospects  there,  and  so 
on. 

"  But,"  he  objected,  "  it  would  be  too  far 
from  my  children." 

'  Your  children !  Yes,  I  have  often  thought 
of  them.  Have  you  their  portraits  with  you?  Do 
let  me  see  them !  ' 

He  really  had  the  portraits  with  him,  and  as  she 
repeated  her  wish,  he  showed  them.  The  two 
girls  did  not  interest  her  much  but  she  was 
delighted  at  the  eight-year-old  fair  boy  with  the 
upturned  look.  "  What  a  lovely  child's  face! 
Isn't  it  a  happiness  to  have  such  a  child !  ' 

'  To  have  it  to-day,  and  lose  to-morrow !  "  he 
replied. 

She  now  examined  the  photograph  more 
exactly  and  began  to  compare  it  with  the  father 
somewhat  too  closely.  He  began  to  feel  some  of 
that  shyness  which  a  man  feels  before  a  woman 
when  she  assumes  this  role. 

'It  is  you,"  she  said,  "and  not  you 
also." 

He  asked  for  no  explanation,  and  she  requested 
that  she  might  keep  the  portrait  by  her. 


90    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

They  resumed  the  discussion  of  the  proposed 
journey,  but  she  was  absent-minded  and  often 
let  her  looks  rest  on  the  photograph. 

He  could  not  guess  what  was  in  her  mind  but 
he  noticed  that  there  was  a  struggle  of  some  kind 
and  that  she  was  on  the  point  of  forming  a  reso- 
lution. He  felt  how  a  network  of  fine  sucker- 
like  tendrils  spread  from  her  being  and  wove 
itself  into  his.  Something  fateful  wras  impending. 
He  felt  depressed,  longed  for  the  circle  of  male 
friends  whom  he  had  abandoned,  and  asked  her 
to  release  him  from  his  promise  not  to  go  any 
more  to  the  cafe. 

"  Are  you  longing  to  go  down  there  again?  " 
she  said  in  a  motherly  voice.  '  Think  of  your 
little  son!  " 

They  went  out  silent  in  the  dark  but  starlit 
evening.  He  had  for  the  first  time  offered  her 
his  arm  and  the  cape  of  his  coat  flapped  loose  in 
the  wind  and  struck  her  face.  '  I  have  already 
dreamt  this  once,"  she  said.  But  he  gave  no 
answer. 

When  they  came  to  her  door,  she  took  him  by 
both  hands,  looked  him  in  the  eyes  and  said  : 
"  Don't  go  to  your  friends."  Then  she  let  her 
veil  drop,  and  before  he  divined  her  intention, 
printed  a  kiss  through  the  veil  on  his  mouth. 
As  he  stretched  out  his  arms  to  embrace  her,  she 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      91 

was  already  behind  the  door,  and  closed  it.  He 
stood  there  completely  crestfallen  without  being 
able  to  understand  how  it  had  happened.  Then 
came  the  conclusion  :  ' '  She  loves  me  and  has  not 
been  playing  with  me."  But  what  audacity !  It 
is  true  she  let  her  veil  fall,  for  she  was  modest, 
and  fled,  alarmed  at  what  she  had  done.  It  was 
original,  but  not  bold-faced;  other  countries, 
other  manners ! 

But  for  a  man  it  was  somewhat  humiliating  to 
receive  the  first  sign  of  love  and  not  to  bestow  it. 
Yet  he  would  never  have  dared  to  run  the  risk 
of  a  possible  box  on  the  ears  and  a  scornful  laugh. 
It  was  well  that  it  had  happened;  now  he  had 
certainty,  and  that  was  enough. 

She  loved  him !  Since  he  was  loved,  he  could 
say  to  himself :  "  I  am  not  so  bad  after  all  if 
someone  can  look  up  to  me  and  believe  good  of 
me."  This  awoke  his  self-respect,  hope,  and 
confidence.  He  felt  himself  young  again,  and 
was  ready  to  begin  a  new  spring.  It  was  true 
that  he  had  only  shown  her  his  good  side, 
but  his  habit  of  suppressing  his  worse  nature 
for  the  occasion  had  brought  his  better  nature 
into  prominence.  This  was  the  secret  of  the 
ennobling  influence  of  real  love.  He  played  the 
part  of  the  magnanimous  till  it  became  a  second 
nature.  The  fact  that  he  discovered  her  beauty, 


92    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

and  was  delighted  with  her  as  a  woman  later  on 
was  a  further  guarantee  that  the  stages  of  their 
love  affair  had  developed  themselves  in  orderly 
progression,  and  that  he  had  not  been  merely 
captivated  by  a  beautiful  exterior.  He  had 
indeed  guessed  her  defects  and  overlooked  them, 
for  that  is  the  duty  of  love,  and  the  chief  proof 
of  its  genuineness,  for  without  forbearance  with 
faults  there  is  no  love.  He  went  home  and  wrote 
the  inevitable  letter.  It  ended  with  the  words : 
' '  Now  the  man  lays  his  head  in  your  lap  as  a 
sign  that  the  good  in  you  overcomes  the  evil  in 
him,  but  do  not  misuse  your  power,  for  then  you 
must  expect  the  usual  fate  of  tyrants." 

The  next  morning  he  sent  off  the  letter  by  a 
messenger.  Ilmarinen  his  Finnish  friend  stood 
by  the  head  of  his  bed  and  looked  mysterious. 
"  Well !  "  he  said.  "  Are  you  going  to  try  once 
more?  " 

"  Yes,  so  it  appears." 

"  And  you  dare  to?" 

'  If  it  comes  to  the  worst,  I  only  dare  to  be 
unhappy,  and  one  is  unhappy  anyhow." 

"  Yes,  yes." 

"It  is  a  change  at  any  rate,  and  this  lonely 
life  is  no  life." 

Instead  of  an  answer  to  his  letter  he  received 
a  telegram  with  a  request  to  meet  her  that  even- 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOTTL    STRAND      93 

ing  at  the  office  of  an  editor  who  might  be  useful 
to  them. 

In  answer  to  this  he  sent  a  message  by  tele- 
gram:  "I  don't  come  till  I  have  received  an 
answer  to  my  letter." 

Again  came  a  telegram,  in  which  she  asked 
to  be  allowed  to  postpone  her  answer  till  the 
next  day. 

He  thought  the  whole  affair  nonsensical  but 
went  to  keep  the  appointment.  She  seemed  as 
though  nothing  had  happened;  they  ate  their 
supper  and  discussed  business.  The  editor  was 
a  married  man,  and  pleasant,  nor  did  he  seem  to 
wish  his  visitors  to  worship  him. 

This  evening,  however,  the  Norwegian  thought 
her  ugly.  She  was  carelessly  dressed,  had  ink 
on  her  fingers,  and  she  talked  so  exclusively  of 
business  that  she  lost  all  her  ideal  aspect.  He 
had  experienced  much  in  his  life,  and  seen  many 
strange  people,  but  anyone  so  eccentric  as  this 
woman  he  had  never  seen.  He  went  home  with 
a  feeling  of  relief,  firmly  resolved  not  to  follow 
her  to  Berlin,  nor  to  link  his  destiny  any  closer 
with  hers.  The  next  morning  he  received  her 
letter;  this  strengthened  him  still  further  in  his 
resolve  to  withdraw.  She  wrote  that  she  was  one 
of  those  women  who  cannot  love.  ("  What  sort 
of  a  woman  is  that  ?  A  mere  phrase ! ' :  he 


94    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

thought.)  He  believed  that  he  loved  her  but  he 
was  only  in  love  with  her  love.  ("  Alexandre 
Dumas  I  think!")  She  still  desired,  however, 
to  remain  his  friend  and  asked  him  to  meet  her 
that  day. 

He  answered  this  with  a  farewell  letter  of 
thanks. 

Then  there  rained  on  him  telegrams  and  express 


messengers. 


Towards  evening  a  hotel  waiter  entered  his 
room  and  announced  that  a  lady  in  a  carriage 
was  waiting  below  to  see  him.  At  first  he  thought 
of  declining  to  go  down,  but  she  might  come  to 
his  room,  and  then  the  bond  would  be  made  fast. 
Accordingly  he  went  down,  entered  the  carriage, 
and  without  reflection  or  saying  anything  they 
gave  each  other  a  kiss,  which  seemed  perfectly 
natural.  There  ensued  a  stormy  conversation 
which  was  extremely  like  a  quarrel.  She  asked 
that  he  should  accompany  her  that  very  night  on 
her  journey,  but  he  gave  a  decided  refusal.  If 
they  were  seen  together,  to-morrow  the  ' '  elope- 
ment "  would  be  in  all  the  newspapers.  That  he 
could  not  bring  his  conscience  to  agree  to,  both 
on  account  of  her  parents  and  his  own  children. 
He  also  told  her  that  he  was  dependent  on  other 
people's  help,  and  that  as  soon  as  he  was  known 
as  an  adventurer  all  these  resources  would  dry  up. 


FAIK    HAVEN    AND    FOTJL    STRAND      95 

c  Then  you  don't  love  me !  ' 

1  What  nonsense  you  talk,  child." 

He  had  to  laugh  at  her.  They  got  out  of  the 
cab  and  continued  their  contest  in  a  little  green 
lane  which  led  down  to  the  shore. 

Now  and  then  he  put  his  arm  round  her  neck 
and  silenced  her  mouth  with  a  kiss. 

' '  I  have  seen  that  you  are  cracked,  but  I  my- 
self am  half -mad,  you  see,  and  you  won't  get  the 
better  of  me." 

"  I  will  jump  into  the  sea!  "  she  shrieked. 
'  Very  well!    I  will  follow,  and  can  swim." 

At  last  he  got  her  to  laugh.  Then  they  entered 
a  cafe  in  order  to  arrive  at  a  final  decision.  Now 
he  had  the  upper  hand  and  treated  her  like  a 
naughty  girl,  and  curiously  enough,  as  soon  as  he 
had  assigned  this  role  to  her,  she  took  it  up  and 
maintained  it. 

Did  these  two  love  each  other  now?  Yes, 
certainly,  for  he  knew  how  tied  he  was,  and  she 
had  already,  as  appeared  later  on,  confessed  her 
love  in  a  letter  to  her  mother,  adding  that  he  was 
to  know  nothing  of  it,  for  then  she  would  immedi- 
ately be  brought  under  the  yoke  of  subjection. 

The  final  decision  they  arrived  at  was  that  she 
should  travel  alone,  and  they  made  no  promises 
to  each  other.  They  were  to  correspond  and 
see  whether  they  would  be  able  to  meet  in  the 


96    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

summer ;  when  his  position  was  more  secure  they 
would  think  of  betrothal  and  marriage. 

They  parted,  and  did  not  see  each  other  again 
for  a  long  time. 

He  went  immediately  afterwards  to  look  up  his 
old  friends  in  the  cafe.  There  in  his  own  circle 
he  wished  to  find  himself  again,  for  during  this 
month's  exclusive  living  with  a  woman,  he  had 
become  loosed  from  his  own  environment,  lost 
his  foothold,  and  built  up  a  common  life  on  the 
shaky  foundation  of  the  temperament  of  a  young 
girl,  whom  his  passion  Tiad  transformed  into  a 
mature  woman.  Her  last  outbreak  of  anger  had 
revealed  a  fury  who  believed  that  she  could 
compel  him  to  blind  obedience.  During  this  her 
face  had  exhibited  all  possible  changes  from  the 
broad  grin  of  Punch  to  the  hissing  of  the  cat 
which  shows  its  white  claws.  He  breathed  more 
lightly,  experienced  a  sensation  of  relief,  and 
entered  the  cafe  feeling  as  though  he  had  left 
something  oppressive  behind  him,  something 
happily  over  and  done  with ! 

The  Swede  sat  there,  and  probably  the  gossip 
regarding  the  Norwegian's  engagement  had 
caused  him  to  bring  his  lady  friend  with  him.  She 
was  a  tall  fragile-looking  Swede  who  seemed  to 
be  emaciated  by  illness;  she  had  a  mournful, 
despairing  sort  of  voice,  a  drawling  accent  and 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      97 

drooping  eyes.  As  an  artist,  although  obscure 
she  was  "  emancipated  "  as  the  phrase  is,  but  not 
free  from  the  feminine  vanity  of  being  able  to 
appear  with  a  number  of  male  hangers-on,  whom 
she  boasted  of  having  made  conquests  of.  Her 
thoughts  had  long  turned  upon  the  Norwegian. 
When  they  met,  she  found  him  novel  and  full  of 
surprises.  At  the  same  time  he  brought  with  him 
the  fire  of  his  newly  kindled  flame.  Within  half 
an  hour  she  had  neither  eyes  nor  ears  for  her 
old  friend.  When  at  last  she  snapped  at  him,  he 
stood  up  and  asked  her  to  come  with  him.  "  You 
can  go,"  she  answered.  And  he  went. 

In  less  than  an  hour  she  had  broken  with  her 
friend  of  many  years  and  formed  a  tie  with  the 
Norwegian  who  an  hour  and  a  half  before  had 
kissed  his  fiancee  at  parting.     He  asked  himself 
how  that  was  possible,  but  took  no  time  to  reflect 
on  it.     She  possessed  the  advantage  of  being 
able  to  understand  him  completely;  he  was  able 
to  speak  out  his  thoughts  after  a  long  imprison- 
ment ;  he  needed  only  to  give  a  hint  in  order  to  be 
understood.     She  drank  in  the  eloquence  of  his 
words,  seemed  to  follow  the  sudden  leaps  of  his 
thought,  and  probably  received  answers  to  many 
questions  which  had  long  occupied  her  mind. 
But  she  was  ugly  and  ill-dressed,  and  he  some- 
times felt  ashamed  at  the  thought  that  he  might 

o 


98    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STEAND 

be  suspected  of  being  her  admirer.  Then  he  felt 
an  unspeakable  sympathy  with  her  which  she 
interpreted  to  mean  that  she  had  made  a  conquest 
of  him. 

They  went  out  into  the  town  and  wandered 
from  cafe  to  cafe,  continually  talking.  Some- 
times his  conscience  pricked  him,  sometimes  he 
felt  a  repulsion  to  her,  because  she  had  been 
faithless  to  her  friend.  Faithlessness  indeed  was 
the  link  which  united  them,  and  they  felt  as  if 
Destiny  had  driven  them  to  commit  the  same 
wrong  on  the  same  evening.  She  had  at  once 
inquired  about  his  engagement  and  he  had  at  first 
given  an  evasive  answer;  but  as  she  had  con- 
tinued to  ask  with  comrade-like  sympathy  he  had 
told  her  the  whole  story.  But  in  doing  so  he 
spoke  of  his  love,  he  became  enthusiastic;  she 
warmed  herself  at  the  glow  and  seemed  to  be  a 
reflection  of  "  the  other."  So  the  two  images 
coincided,  and  the  absent  maiden,  who  should 
have  been  a  barrier  between  them,  was  the  one 
who  brought  them  near  each  other. 

The  next  day  they  met  again,  and  she  never 
seemed  tired  of  discussing  his  engagement.  She 
was  in  a  critical  mood  and  began  to  express 
doubts  whether  he  would  be  happy.  But  she 
went  carefully  to  work,  showed  indulgence,  and 
only  attempted  purely  objective  psychological 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND      99 

analysis.  She  also  understood  how  to  withdraw 
a  severe  expression  at  the  right  time  in  order  not 
to  frighten  him  away. 

Now  as  ill-luck  would  have  it,  he  received  at 
noon  a  letter  from  his  fiancee  which  was  the 
answer  to  the  stormy  one  he  had  written  when 
they  parted.  In  her  letter  she  only  wrote  of 
business  matters,  gave  good  advice  in  a  superior 
tone,  in  a  word  was  pedantic  and  narrow-minded. 
Not  a  trace  of  the  pretty  young  girl  was  to  be 
found  in  the  letter.  This  put  him  out  of  humour 
and  aroused  his  disgust  to  such  a  degree  that 
when  he  met  his  new  friend,  with  a  ruthless 
joy  in  destruction  he  proceeded  to  analyse  his- 
fiancee  under  the  microscope.  The  Swede  was 
not  backward  with  her  feminine  knowledge  of 
feminine  secrets  to  put  the  worst  interpretation 
on  all  the  details  which  he  narrated.  He  had 
cast  his  lamb  to  the  she-wolf,  who  tore  the  prey 
asunder  while  he  looked  on. 

At  the  beginning  of  April,  that  is  three  weeks 
later,  the  Norwegian  sat  in  the  cafe  one  after- 
noon with  Lais,  as  she  was  called,  after  she  had 
become  the  friend  of  the  company  in  general, 
not  of  anyone  in  particular.  He  sat  there  with 
a  resigned  air,  "prepared  for  everything"  as 
usual.  It  had  been  difficult  to  keep  his  engage- 
ment alive  by  means  of  the  post,  and  it  had 


100    FAIK   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

become  still  more  uncertain  after  the  news  had 
reached  her  father's  ears  and  brought  him  to 
despair.  He  was  a  Minister  of  State,  lived  at 
Odense,  went  to  Court  when  he  was  in  the 
capital,  and  wore  twelve  orders.  He  would  rather 
shoot  himself  than  be  the  father-in-law  of  a 
notorious  nihilist.  In  order  to  put  an  end  to  the 
affair  the  old  man  had  dictated  his  conditions, 
which  were  of  course  impossible. 

The  Norwegian  must  pay  all  his  debts  and  give 
a  guarantee  that  he  would  have  a  regular  and 
sufficient  income.  Since  a  writer  of  plays  has 
nothing  guaranteed,  but  is  dependent  on  popular 
favour,  the  wooer  considered  his  proposal  with- 
drawn, and  regarded  himself  as  unfettered,  and 
indeed  he  was  so.  Moreover,  thus  humiliating 
correspondence  about  pecuniary  matters  had 
cooled  his  devotion,  for  love  letters  which  were 
full  of  figures  and  motherly  advice,  practical 
items  of  information  about  publishers  and  so  on, 
were  not  inspiring  to  read  for  a  literary  free-lance. 
And  as  the  correspondence  slackened,  and  finally 
ceased,  he  considered  himself  entirely  free. 

With  her  usual  vanity,  Lais  had  ascribed  to 
herself  the  honour  of  having  dissolved  his  engage- 
ment, although  there  was  no  reason  for  her  doing 
so.  Moreover,  in  the  last  few  days  a  circumstance 
had  happened  which  was  fortunate  for  his 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     101 

future.  Another  friend  of  Lais  had  arrived 
from  the  north,  and  as  he  was  one  of  her  admirers 
she  had  such  assiduous  court  paid  to  her  that  she 
did  not  notice  how  the  Norwegian  was  slackening 
in  his  attentions. 

In  order  to  celebrate  the  arrival  of  the  new- 
comer, the  last  few  days  had  been  a  continual 
feast,  and  now  they  were  in  that  strange  con- 
dition, when  the  soul  is,  so  to  speak,  loosed  from 
its  bearings  and  utters  its  thoughts  without 
distinction  and  without  regard. 

Lais  was  possessed  by  the  not  unusual  idea  that 
she  was  irresistible,  and  liked  to  produce  the 
impression  that  all  her  male  friends,  even  those 
who  had  dropped  her,  were  dismissed  admirers. 
Now  she  wished  to  show  her  newly  arrived  friend 
how  well  she  was  provided  with  them  and  began 
to  skirmish  with  the  Norwegian.  Since  he  had 
long  cherished  towards  her  the  hate  which  is 
born  of  imprudently  bestowed  confidences,  he 
seized  the  opportunity  to  bring  about  the  breach 
without  scandal,  in  a  word  to  dispose  of  her  with- 
out disgrace  to  either  of  them.  Under  some  pre- 
text, or  perhaps  with  a  foreboding  that  something 
was  about  to  happen,  he  took  his  leave  and 
left  the  other  two  together.  But  Lais  pressed 
him  to  remain,  probably  to  gain  an  opportunity 
of  leaving  him  aloneA  when  she  went  out  with 


102    FAIR   HAVEN  AND    FOUL    STRAND 

her  friend.  Here,  however,  she  had  made  a  mis- 
calculation. Making  a  gesture  of  invitation  to 
the  new-comer,  the  Norwegian  went  out  after 
saying  the  last  word :  ' '  Now  I  leave  you 
alone!" 

When  he  came  out  on  the  street,  he  had  a 
certain  uneasy  suspicion  that  he  had  left  some- 
thing unfinished  behind  him,  and  had  something 
unexpected  before  him.  He  thought  he  heard 
the  hissing  voice  of  the  woman  he  had  left.  She 
never  opened  her  lips,  which  were  sharply 
defined,  like  those  of  a  snake,  when  she  spoke, 
but  brought  the  words  straight  out  of  her  throat, 
which  was  always  hoarse  through  her  sitting  up 
at  night  drinking  and  smoking.  Such  a  voice  in 
women  he  called  a  ' '  porter  voice  ' '  because  it 
always  reminded  him  of  that  black  drink  and  its 
concomitants. 

Such  is  friendship  with  women — either  it  ends 
in  love  or  in  hatred  just  like  love ! 

When  he  came  to  his  hotel,  the  waiter  handed 
him  a  local  telegram.  "  That  is  what  brought 
me  home,"  he  said  to  himself.  His  experiences 
had  made  him  believe  in  telepathy  to  such  a 
degree  that  he  was  in  the  habit  of  saying  when 
in  company  and  there  was  talk  of  sending  for 
some  absent  person :  '  Shall  we  telepath  to 
him?" 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND     103 

Before  he  opened  the  telegram  he  believed  he 
knew  the  contents,  and  when  he  had  read,  he 
felt  as  though  he  had  done  so  before,  and  was 
not  surprised.  The  telegram  ran  thus  :  "  I  am 

here;  look  me  up  at  Doctor 's.  Important 

news." 

He  stood  still  for  two  minutes  in  order  to  form 
a  resolution.  When  the  waiter  came  he  asked 
him  to  telephone  to  the  friendly  doctor,  who  had 
a  private  hospital  of  his  own  and  enjoyed  a  very 
good  reputation.  The  doctor  came  at  once  and 
explained  the  situation  :  ' '  Are  you  thinking  of 
drawing  back?"  he  asked. 

' '  No,  but  I  must  collect  myself,  and  sleep  for 
twelve  hours,  for  my  nerves  are  out  of  control. 
I  will  send  a  telegram  to  say  that  I  am  not  well. 
She  will  not  believe  that,  but  will  come  herself; 
I  beg  you  therefore  to  wait  for  half  an  hour." 

The  telegram  went  off,  and  in  half  an  hour 
steps  were  heard  along  the  corridor.  She 
entered,  dressed  in  black  and  at  first  full  of 
suspicion.  But  to  be  able  to  consult  with  the 
doctor  gave  her  an  advantage  which  pleased  her. 
She  said  she  would  come  next  morning  together 
with  the  doctor,  and  then  she  went,  after  secretly 
imprinting  a  kiss  on  the  patient's  hand. 

"  You  must  not  play  with  your  feelings," 
said  the  doctor  who  remained  behind.  "This 


104    FAIR,   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

woman  loves  you  and  you  love  her.    That  is  as 
plain  as  a  pikestaff." 

The  Norwegian  lay  alone  all  the  evening  and 
sought  to  find  some  guiding  thread  through  all 
this  chaos,  but  in  vain.  What  a  tangled  thicket 
was  the  human  soul !  How  could  one  bring  it 
into  order?  It  passed  from  hate  to  contempt 
over  esteem  and  reverence  and  then  back  again 
with  one  bound  sideways  and  two  forwards. 
Good  and  evil,  sublime  and  mean,  uniting 
treachery  with  deathless  love,  kisses  and  blows, 
insulting  reproaches  and  boundless  admiration. 
Since  he  knew  the  human  soul  he  had  adopted  it 
as  one  of  his  fundamental  principles  never  to 
balance  accounts,  never  to  go  backwards,  but 
always  forwards.  When  in  the  beginning  of 
their  acquaintance  she  had  wished  to  refer  to 
something  which  he  had  said  on  a  previous 
occasion  he  interrupted  her :  ' '  Never  look 
back !  Only  go  forwards !  One  talks  a  lot  of 
nonsense  on  the  spur  of  the  moment.  I  have  no 
views  but  only  speak  impromptu,  and  life  would 
be  very  monotonous  if  one  thought  and  said  the 
same  things  every  day.  It  should  be  something 
new  !  Life  is  only  a  poem,  and  it  is  much  jollier 
to  float  over  the  marsh  than  to  stick  one's  feet 
in  it  and  to  feel  for  firm  ground  which  is  not 
there/' 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     105 

This  must  have  suited  her  own  ideas  of  life, 
for  she  was  immediately  ready  to  adopt  this  role. 
Therefore  they  found  each  other  always  novel, 
and  always  full  of  surprises.  They  could  not  take 
each  other  too  seriously,  and  often  when  one  of 
them  attacked  his  or  her  own  discarded  views 
with  the  other's  opinions  of  the  day  before,  they 
were  obliged  to  laugh  at  their  own  foolishness. 
Thus  they  were  never  clear  about  each  other, 
and  in  really  serious  moments  they  would  exclaim 
simultaneously  :  ' '  Who  are  you  ?  What  are 
you  really?  '  and  neither  of  them  could 
answer. 

As  he  was  on  the  point  of  falling  asleep,  he 
thought,  ' '  I  shall  make  no  resolve,  for  I  have 
never  seen  a  resolve  lead  to  anything.  The 
course  of  events  may  guide  my  destiny  as  it  has 
done  hitherto." 

The  next  morning  she  came  without  waiting 
for  the  doctor.  She  had  put  on  a  wise  air,  as  if 
she  understood  the  illness  thoroughly  but  did  not 
wish  to  descend  to  trifles.  She  took  a  rod  out  of 
a  basket  she  had  brought  with  her. 

"What  is  that?" 

' '  That  is  '  the  Easter  rod '  ;  to-day  is  Good 
Friday."  She  set  up  the  rod  at  his  feet,  and 
adorned  the  edge  of  the  bed  with  willow-branches 
in  bloom.  Like  a  little  housewife  she  bustled 


106    FAIR   HAYEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

about  the  room,  surveying  and  putting  it  in  order. 
Finally  she  sat  down  in  an  easy  chair. 

'  Well !    What  is  the  great  news?  "  he  asked. 
'  We  must  enter  on  an  engagement,  for  the 
papers  have  announced  it." 

1 '  Have  they,  indeed  ?  What  about  the  old 
man?" 

'  Father  has  resigned  himself,  because  the 
matter  cannot  be  altered;  but  he  is  not  happy. 
Now  won't  you  congratulate  me?" 

'  You  should  congratulate  me  first,  for  I  am 
the  elder." 

"  And  the  less  intelligent." 

"  I  have  the  honour  to  congratulate  you.  And 
what  a  man  you  have  got !  ' 

So  they  chatted,  and  soon  came  to  the  subject 
of  their  prospects.  He  dictated  and  she  wrote. 
Such  and  such  plays  of  his  accepted  for  the 
stage.  .  .  .  That  would  be  a  thousand 
pounds. 

' '  Discount  thirty  per  cent  for  disappoint- 
ments," she  said. 

' '  Thirty !  I  also  reckon  ninety  or  a  hundred 
per  cent." 

"Be  sober!  It  is  serious."  And  then  they 
laughed. 

Divine  frivolity!  To  look  down  on  the  ugly 
earnestness  of  life  as  if  all  one  had  to  do  was  to 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    107 

blow  at  it.  The  poet's  light-hearted  way  of 
treating  economy  like  poetry. 

"  How  could  one  bear  the  miseries  of  life, 
if  one  did  not  treat  them  as  unrealities  ?  If  I  took 
it  seriously,  I  should  have  to  weep  the  whole  day, 
and  I  don't  want  to  do  that." 

Dinner-time  came ;  she  laid  the  sofa-table,  fed 
him,  and  was  especially  sparing  with  the  wine. 

' '  You  have  drunk  enough  now,  and  you  must 
promise  never  to  go  to  the  cafe  again,  especially 
with  Thais." 

"  Lais,"  he  corrected  her,  but  coloured. 
"You  know  that  then?" 

"  A  woman  of  twenty-three  knows  every- 
thing." 

Glad  to  avoid  a  troublesome  confession,  he 
promised  never  to  visit  the  cafe  again  and  kept 
his  word,  for  that  was  the  only  penance  he  could 
offer  for  his  sorry  behaviour.  Thus  they  were 
engaged.  His  only  social  intercourse  consisted 
in  her  company,  while  she  continued  to  go  to 
families  which  she  knew,  to  visit  theatres,  and 
so  on,  for  this  belonged  to  her  work  as  a  news- 
paper correspondent.  In  case  of  an  eventual 
struggle  for  power,  she  had  all  the  advantages 
on  her  side,  as  she  moved  in  an  environment  from 
which  she  derived  moral  support  and  fresh 
impulses,  while  he  was  thrown  back  on  himself 


108    FAIB   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

and  his  previous  observations.  They  lived  really 
like  playfellows,  for  he  never  read  what  she  wrote 
in  the  newspapers,  while  she  had  read  all  his 
writings  but  never  referred  to  them.  There  was 
no  consciousness  shown  on  either  side  that  he  was 
a  mature  and  well-known  author  and  she  a  young 
critic  of  books  and  plays.  They  met  simply  as 
man  and  woman,  and  as  her  future  husband  he 
had  placed  himself  on  the  same  level  with  her, 
not  above  her. 

Sometimes  while  they  were  together,  he  felt  a 
prisoner,  isolated  and  in  her  power.  If  he  were 
to  break  with  her  now  he  would  stand  alone  in  the 
world,  for  he  had  got  quite  out  of  touch  with  his 
old  friends  and  come  to  dislike  the  life  of  the 
cafe.  Moreover,  he  felt  so  grown  together  with 
this  woman,  that  he  thought  he  would  pine  away 
if  parted  from  her.  In  spite  of  her  love  she  could 
not  hide  the  fact  that  she  thought  she  had  him 
absolutely  in  her  power,  and  sometimes  she  let 
him  feel  it.  But  then  he  raged  like  a  lion  in  a 
cage,  went  out  and  sought  his  old  friends,  though 
he  noticed  he  did  not  thrive  among  them  and  his 
conscience  pricked  him  for  his  faithlessness.  She 
sulked  for  half  a  day,  then  crept  up  to  him,  fell 
on  her  knees  and  was  pardoned. 

"  At  bottom,"  he  said  once,  "we  hate  each 
other  because  we  love  each  other.  We  fear  to 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     109 

lose  our  individualities  through  the  assimilating 
force  of  love,  and  therefore  we  must  sometimes 
have  a  breach  in  order  to  feel  that  I  am  not  you, 
and  you  are  not  I." 

She  agreed,  but  it  was  no  remedy  against  the 
spirit  of  revolt,  the  struggle  of  the  ego  for  self- 
justification.  She  loved  him  as  a  woman  loves 
a  man,  for  she  thought  him  handsome,  although 
he  was  ugly.  He,  for  his  part,  demanded  neither 
respect  nor  admiration  but  only  a  measure  of 
trust,  and  a  friendly  demeanour.  She  was 
generally  sparkling  and  cheerful,  playful,  with- 
out being  teasing,  yielding  and  gracious. 

Once  when  he  reflected  over  the  various  types 
of  woman  he  had  observed  in  her  during  the 
beginning  of  their  acquaintance,  he  could 
scarcely  understand  how  she  had  been  able  to 
play  so  many  different  parts.  The  literary  inde- 
pendent lady  with  Madame  de  StaeTs  open  mouth 
and  loquacious  tongue  had  entirely  disappeared ; 
the  grand,  pretentious  woman  of  the  world  and 
the  fin-de-siecle  lady  with  morbid  paradoxes  were 
also  both  obliterated.  She  saw  how  unpreten- 
tious he  was  and  she  became  like  him. 

April  came  and  it  wras  high  spring-time.  At  the 
same  time  his  prospects  had  brightened ;  some  of 
his  plays  had  been  accepted;  a  novel  sold  for  a 
considerable  sum;  and  one  of  his  dramas  was 


110    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

acted  in  Paris.  An  untrue  report  was  spread 
that  the  engaged  pair  had  gone  off  together.  Her 
parents  in  Odense  were  disturbed  and  urged  on 
the  marriage. 

'  Will  you  marry  now?  "  she  asked. 

'  Certainly  I  will/'  was  his  reply. 
So  the  matter  was  settled !  But  then  came 
difficulties.  She  was  a  Catholic  and  could  not 
marry  a  divorced  man  as  long  as  his  first  wife 
lived.  In  order  to  circumvent  this  difficulty  he 
devised  the  plan  of  being  married  in  England. 
And  so  it  was  settled.  Her  sister  came  as  a 
witness  to  the  ceremony.  She  was  married  to 
a  famous  artist,  was  herself  an  authoress,  and 
therefore  understood  how  to  value  talent,  even 
when  unaccompanied  with  earthly  goods. 
Thus  they  began  their  wedding  journey. 


Ill 

It  was  a  May  morning  on  an  island  off  the 
English  coast.  He  had  gone  with  her  to  the 
extreme  end  of  a  promontory  where  the  cliff 
descends  sheer  into  the  sea.  He  wished  to  ask 
her  something  privately  but  did  not  dare  to; 
therefore  they  stood  there  silently  staring  into 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     111 

the  blue  emptiness,  seeking  an  object  where  there 
was  none. 

They  had  stayed  there  six  days  without  being 
able  to  marry  because  through  carelessness  the 
notice  of  his  divorce  had  not  been  published  till 
some  months  after  he  had  obtained  a  decree. 
Accordingly  it  bore  so  late  a  date  that  the  time 

c?  •/ 

allowed  for  challenging  it  had  not  yet  elapsed. 
He  had  exchanged  telegrams  with  the  authori- 
ties; confusion  and  misunderstanding  caused 
further  delay,  and  his  fiancee's  sister  became 
impatient. 

"  Do  you  trust  me?  "  he  asked  her. 

'  Yes,  I  believe  in  your  honesty,  but  you  are 
an  unlucky  creature." 
' '  And  your  sister  ?  ' : 

"  What  is  she  to  believe?  She  does  not  know 
you.  She  only  knows  that  your  assurances  that 
the  documents  were  valid,  were  incorrect." 

'  She  is  right,  but  it  is  not  my  fault.  What 
does  she  mean  to  do?  ' 

'  She  returns  to-morrow,  and  I  must  go  with 
her." 

'  So  then  we  shall  be  parted  before  we  are 
married,  and  I  return  to  life  in  hotels,  restau- 
rants, and  night  cafes." 

'  No,  not  that,"  and  after  a  pause  she  added  : 
c  Let  us  jump  into  the  sea." 


112    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

He  put  his  arm  round  her  :  ' '  Have  you  ever 
seen  a  destiny  like  mine?  Wherever  I  go,  I  bring 
unhappiness  and  destruction  with  me.  Think ! 
Your  parents ! >: 

'  Don't  talk  so!    With  patience  we  shall  also 
get  out  of  this." 

'  Yes,  in  order  to  fall  into  something  else." 
"  Come !  shall  I  blow  at  it?  "    And  she  blew 
the  cloud  away.    There  was  an  outbreak  of  divine 
frivolity  again  and  they  raced  home  through  the 
fortifications  and  over  the  mines. 

In  the  evening  the  decisive  telegram  came,  and 
the  wedding  was  fixed  for  the  next  day.  It  took 
place  at  first  at  the  registry  office.  While  the 
oaths  were  being  taken  the  bride  fell  into 
hysterical  laughter  which  nearly  rendered  the 
whole  ceremony  abortive,  since  the  registrar  did 
not  know  what  to  make  of  a  scene  which  resem- 
bled one  in  a  lunatic  asylum. 

It  was   not  a    brilliant  wedding-party    which 

assembled   in   the   evening   in    the  clergyman's 

house.    Besides  the  bride's  sister,  four  strangers 

—pilots — were  present  as  witnesses  when  they 

plighted  their  troth  "  before  God." 

Fourteen  days  of  May  had  passed.  Both  were 
sitting  outside  the  comfortable  little  house  and 
watching  how  the  migratory  birds  rested  in  the 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     113 

garden  before  continuing  their  journey  north- 
ward. 

"So  quiet?  " 

"  How  long?" 

;'  Eight  days  more.  But  I  had  not  thought 
that  marriage  was  such  a  splendid  arrangement." 
Although  they  call  me  a  woman-hater, ' '  he 
said,  ' '  I  have  always  loved  woman,  and  although 
they  call  me  a  friend  of  immorality,  I  have  always 
held  by  marriage." 

'  Can  you  imagine  yourself  leading  a  lonely 
life  after  this?" 

"No,  the  thought  chokes  me." 
'  Do  you   know   I  am  so  happy  that  I  am 
afraid?" 

'  Yes,  so  am  I.  I  feel  as  if  someone  were  lying 
and  spying  on  us.  She  is  called  Nemesis,  and 
follows  not  only  guilty  but  also  happy  men." 

' '  What  are  you  most  afraid  of  ?  " 

"  That  we  should  part." 

"  But  that  depends  on  us,  I  suppose." 

*  *  Would  that  it  did  !  But  discord  comes  from 
without  with  the  wind,  with  the  dew,  with  too 
long-continued  sunshine,  with  the  rain.  Try  to 
explain  which  of  us  two  was  to  blame  for  our 
last  quarrel." 

"Neither!" 

"  Neither  of  us  two,  then  it  was  a  third.   Who 

H 


114    FAIR   HAVEN  AND    FOUL    STRAND 

is  this  third?  In  order  to  give  it  a  name  people 
call  it  '  misunderstanding  '  ;  but  both  of  our 
understandings  were  completely  clear,  not  dis- 
turbed at  all." 

"Don't  frighten  me. " 

' '  No,  but  be  sure  that  the  same  event  will 
happen  again  and  that  we  shall  blame  each  other 
as  on  the  last  occasion." 

"  Shall  we  not  go  and  write  now?  "  she 
broke  in. 

"  I  cannot  write." 

'  Nor  can  I;  my  editor  is  angry  because  he 
has  had  no  article  from  me  for  two  months." 

'  And  I  have  not  had  a  single  new  idea  for 
a  whole  year.  What  will  be  the  end  of 
it?" 

The  fact  was  that  they  had  neutralised  each 
other,  so  that  there  was  no  more  reaction  on 
either  side.  Their  life  together  now  consisted 
of  a  comfortable  silence.  The  need  to  be  near 
each  other  was  so  great  that  one  could  not  leave 
the  room  without  the  other  following.  They 
tried  to  shut  themselves  in  their  rooms  in  order 
to  work,  but  after  a  short  time  one  would  knock 
at  the  other's  door. 

' '  Do  you  know,  all  this  is  very  fine,  but  I  am 
becoming  an  idiot?"  she  complained. 

"  You  also?" 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     115 

"  I  can  neither  read,  think,  nor  write  any 
more,  and  can  hardly  speak." 

"It  is  too  much  happiness,  and  we  must 
seek  some  society,  or  we  shall  both  become 
silly." 

The  fact  was  that  they  had  both  ceased  to 
converse;  they  were  apparently  so  harmonious 
in  all  questions  and  predilections  and  knew  each 
other's  opinions  so  well  that  there  was  no  further 
need  to  exchange  thoughts.  The  same  tastes, 
the  same  habits,  the  same  naughtinesses,  the 
same  superficial  scepticism  had  brought  them 
together,  and  now  they  were  welded  into  one 
like  two  pieces  of  the  same  metal.  Each  had 
lost  individuality  and  they  were  one.  But  the 
memory  of  independence  and  one's  own  person- 
ality was  still  present,  and  a  war  of  liberation  was 
impending.  The  sense  of  personal  self-preser- 
vation awoke,  and  when  each  wished  to  resume 
their  own  share,  there  was  a  strife  about  the 
pieces. 

'  Why  don't  you  write?  "  he  asked. 
*  I  have  tried,  but  it  is  always  you  and  about 
you." 

'  Whether  it  is  I,  or  someone  else,  it  all  comes 
to  the  same  thing." 

'  You  mean  I  have  no  self?  ' 

"  You  are  too  young  to  have  a  self." 


He  had  better  have  left  that  unsaid,  for  by 
saying  it,  he  woke  her. 

One  morning  there  came  a  paper  containing 
a  notice  to  the  effect  that  a  volume  of  his  poems 
had  appeared  with  a  London  publisher. 

"  Shall  we  go  to  London?  "  she  suggested. 
'  Yes,  gladly,  though  I  don't  believe  these 
notices  which  I  have  read  so  often.     Anyhow, 
as  a  business  journey,  it  can  be  made  to  pay  its 
own  expenses. " 

The  resolve  was  carried  out.  They  saw  the 
little  island  *  disappear  with  the  same  joy  with 
which  they  had  before  seen  it  rise  out  of  the  mist. 

In  Dover  they  had  to  stay  one  day  at  an  hotel. 
As  he  returned  from  a  walk,  he  found  his  wife 
sealing  up  six  packets,  all  of  the  same  shape 
and  size. 

"  What  are  you  doing?  "  he  asked. 

"It  is  the  account  of  your  American  journey, 
which  I  am  sending  to  some  papers  I  know  in 
Denmark." 

"  But  you  should  not  cut  it  up  into  sections; 
you  know  that  it  forms  a  complete  whole.  Have 
you  read  it?  " 

"No,  I  have  only  glanced  through  it;  but 
at  any  rate  it  will  bring  in  some  money." 

*  Heligoland. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    117 

:'  No,  it  will  not;  for  no  one  will  print  it 
piecemeal.  Only  in  a  single  volume  would  it 
have  any  value." 

She  paid  no  attention.  "  Come  now,"  she 
said  commandingly ;  "we  will  go  to  the  post." 

She  meant  wellA  but  was  foolish ;  and  although 
experience  had  taught  him  what  a  dangerous 
adviser  she  was,  he  let  her  have  her  way,  and 
followed. 

On  the  stairs,  he  noticed  that  she  limped,  for 
she  had  bought  too  tight  boots  with  high  heels, 
such  as  were  then  only  worn  by  cocottes. 

When  they  reached  the  street,  she  hurried 
on  to  the  post,  and  he  followed.  As  he  noticed 
how  the  symmetry  of  her  little  figure  was 
impaired  by  the  many  packages  which  she 
insisted  on  carrying,  and  how  she  limped  on  the 
boot  heel  which  she  had  trodden  down,  he  was 
seized  with  a  sort  of  repulsion. 

It  was  the  first  time  that  he  viewed  her  from 
behind,  and  he  thought  involuntarily  of  the  wood- 
nymph  of  legend,  who  in  front  was  a  charming 
fairy,  but  behind  quite  hollow. 

The  next  moment  he  felt  a  remorseful  horror 
at  himself  and  his  thoughts.  In  this  cruel  heat 
the  little  woman  was  carrying  the  heavy  load, 
and  had  already  written  six  long  letters  to 
editors  all  for  his  sake.  And  she  limped !  But 


118    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

her  brutal  way  of  treating  his  workA  and  cutting 
a  manuscript  to  pieces  without  having  read  it; 
treating  a  literary  work  as  a  butcher  does  a 
carcass !  .  .  . 

Again  he  felt  repulsion,  and  again  remorse, 
mixed  with  that  indescribable  pain  which  a  man 
feels  when  he  sees  his  beloved  ugly,  badly 
dressed,  pitiful,  or  ridiculous.  People  in  the 
street  looked  after  her,  especially  when  the  wind 
blew  out  her  thin  serge  mantle,  which  resembled 
a  morning  coat ;  it  swelled  out  like  a  balloon  and 
spoilt  her  tine  figure.  He  hurried  forward  to  take 
the  packets  from  her ;  but  she  only  waved  him  off, 
and  hastened  on,  cheerful  and  undismayed. 

When  she  came  out  of  the  post  office,  she 
wanted  to  go  and  buy  larger  boots.  He  followed. 
Since  the  purchase  of  them  would  occupy  half 
an  hour,  she  told  him  to  wait  outside.  When 
at  last  she  came  out,  she  walked  quite  comfort- 
ably for  a  time,  but  then  discovered  that  the 
new  boots  also  were  too  tight. 

' '  What  do  you  think  of  a  shoemaker  like 
that?"  she  said. 

' '  But  he  did  not  make  the  boots  too  tight  for 
you!  There  were  larger  ones  also." 

That  was  a  dangerous  commencement  of  the 
conversation,  and  as  they  sat  down  at  a  'table  in 
a  cafe,  the  silence  was  uncomfortable.  They 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    119 

sat  opposite  each  other  and  had  to  look  one 
another  in  the  eyes;  they  sought  to  avoid  doing 
so,  but  could  not,  and  when  they  were  obliged 
to  look  at  each  other,  they  turned  away. 

'  You  would  like  now  to  be  in  Copenhagen 
with  your  friends,"  she  said.  It  was  a  good 
guess.  But  even  if  he  could  have  transported 
himself  thither  for  a  second,  he  would  have 
wished  himself  back  again  at  once. 

Her  nervousness  increased,  and  her  eyes 
began  to  sparkle,  but  since  she  was  intelligent, 
she  understood  that  neither  of  them  was  to 
blame. 

' '  Go  for  a  walk, ' '  she  said ;  ' '  we  must  be  away 
from  each  other  for  a  while,  and  then  you  will 
see  it  will  be  better." 

He  quite  agreed  with  her,  and  they  parted 
without  any  bitterness. 

As  he  walked  along  by  the  side  of  the  harbour, 
he  felt  his  nerves  become  settled  and  quiet.  He 
became  once  more  conscious  of  himself  as  a 
separate  and  independent  being;  he  no  longer 
gave  out  emanations  but  concentrated  himself; 
he  was  once  more  an  individual  in  his  own  skin. 
How  well  he  knew  these  symptoms,  which  signi- 
fied nothing,  but  which  in  spite  of  all  attempts 
to  explain  them,  persisted  as  a  constant  phe- 
nomenon. 


120    FAIR  HAVEN   AND   FOUL 

Meanwhile,  since  he  felt  a  positive  satisfaction 
in  her  absence,  the  thought  stole  into  his  mind 
that  perpetual  freedom  from  her  would  be 
attended  by  yet  greater  satisfaction,  and  as  he 
approached  the  steam-boat  pier  the  thought 
passed  through  his  mind  like  a  flash  of  lightning  : 
'  If  I  go  off  now,  I  shall  be  in  Copenhagen  in 
two  days." 

He  sat  down,  ordered  a  glass  of  beer,  lighted 
a  cigar,  and  considered. 

"  If  I  go  to  London,"  he  thought,  "  she  will 
get  the  upper  hand,  because  she  can  speak  the 
language.  I  shall  be  led  about  by  her  like  a  deaf 
and  dumb  man  and  shall  have  to  sit  like  an  idiot 
among  my  literary  friends  whom  she  will  get 
under  her  thumb.  A  pleasant  prospect!  Being 
patronised  by  her  in  the  Danish  newspapers  was 
already  sufficiently  humiliating.  I  incurred  an 
obligation  to  her.  .  .  J 

But  in  the  midst  of  his  meditations  he  broke 
off,  for  he  knew  that  no  character  could  stand 
such  close  and  critical  analysis.  He  knew  also 
that  no  one  could  endure  being  gazed  at  from 
behind  and  judged  in  absence.  Then  a  feeling 
of  loneliness  came  over  him  and  a  consciousness 
of  being  faithless  and  ungrateful.  He  was  drawn 
back  to  her,  stood  up  and  went  quickly  to  the 
hotel.  When  he  entered  in  an  elevated  mood  and 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    121 

not  without  sentimental  feelings  he  was  greeted 
by  a  laugh,  long-lasting  and  cheerful  like  the 
song  of  the  grasshoppers.  Dressed  in  silk  she 
lay  there,  coiled  up  like  an  Angora  cat,  eating 
sweetmeats,  and  smelling  of  perfume. 

Then  they  laughed  both  together,  as  though 
they  had  seen  something  comic  in  the  street, 
which  had  nothing  to  do  with  them. 

Now  they  were  in  Pimlico,  between  West- 
minster and  Chelsea.  They  had  paid  one  visit 
and  that  was  all.  Everyone  was  away,  all  the 
theatres  were  shut,  and  a  perfectly  tropical  heat 
prevailed.  One's  soul  felt  as  if  it  would  gladly 
shake  off  its  fleshly  husk  in  order  to  seek  for 
coolness  up  in  the  air.  From  morning  to  even- 
ing one  felt  only  half  alive. 

The  pressure  of  need  had  forced  him  unwil- 
lingly to  set  to  work  and  write.  But  as  he  had 
already  utilised  most  of  his  experiences,  he  was 
obliged  to  make  use  of  some  material  which 
should,  properly  speaking,  not  have  been 
employed.  However,  he  did  violence  to  him- 
self, overcame  his  scruples,  and  began. 

'  Now   I   am  writing,"    he  told  her  trium- 
phantly, "  we  are  saved !  " 

His  wife  came  and  saw  how  he  had  filled  the 
first  sheet  with  letters.  After  an  hour  she  came 


122    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOtTL    STRAND 

again.     He  was  lying  on   the  sofa  lamenting : 
'  I  can  do  nothing !    Let  us  then  perish !  " 

She  left  the  room  without  saying  a  word,  and 
when  she  had  shut  the  door,  he  bolted  it.  Then 
he  took  out  of  his  portmanteau  a  green  linen  bag 
containing  a  quantity  of  sheets  of  paper  covered 
with  dates.  These  had  been  often  spoken  of  by 
his  friends  and  nicknamed  the  "  Last  Judgment." 

It  was  an  historical  work,  in  which,  from  a 
new  and  bold  point  of  view,  he  treated  the  history 
of  the  world  as  a  branch  of  natural  science.  He 
had  planned  it  carefully,  but  perhaps  it  was 
destined  never  to  be  printed  and  would  certainly 
never  bring  in  any  money. 

After  working  for  some  time,  he  felt  the  usual 
restlessness  which  he  experienced  in  the  absence 
of  his  second  self,  and  went  down  to  seek  her. 

She  sat  reading  a  book  which  she  made  a  lame 
attempt  to  hide,  as  he  entered.  By  her  strange 
manner  he  saw  that  some  fateful  element  had 
entered  into  their  common  life. 

"What  are  you  reading?  "  he  asked. 

"  Your  last  book,"  she  answered  in  a  peculiar 
tone. 

"It  has  appeared  then!  Don't  read  it;  you 
will  poison  yourself." 

It  was  a  ruthless  description  of  his  first 
marriage,  written  in  self-defence  and  as  a  last 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND    123 

testament,  for  he  had  intended,  after  completing 
it,  to  take  his  life.  For  years  the  manuscript  had 
remained  sealed  up  in  the  care  of  a  relative,  and 
he  had  never  intended  to  print  it.  But  in  the  last 
spring  and  under  the  pressure  of  necessity,  after 
he  had  been  assailed  most  unjustly  by  gossips 
and  in  the  newspapers,  he  had  sold  the  book  to 
a  publisher. 

And  now  it  had  appeared  and  fallen  into  the 
hands  of  the  very  last  person  who  should  have 
seen  it.  His  first  impulse  was  to  snatch  the  book 
from  her,  but  he  was  restrained  by  the  thought : 
' '  It  has  happened ;  well,  let  it  happen  !  '  And 
with  perfect  calm,  as  though  he  had  assisted  at 
his  own  inevitable  execution,  he  left  the  room. 
At  lunch,  he  noticed  the  strange  transformation 
which  had  taken  place  in  his  wife.  Her  face 
wore  a  new  expression;  her  looks  searched  his 
whole  person,  as  though  she  were  comparing 
him  with  the  man  described  in  the  book.  He 
took  for  granted  that  his  sufferings  there  de- 
scribed would  not  arouse  her  pity,  for  a  woman 
always  takes  sides  with  her  own  sex.  But  what 
he  could  not  understand  was  that  she  seemed  to 
recognise  herself  in  certain  of  her  predecessor's 
characteristics.  Perhaps  her  mind  was  occupied 
by  some  still  unsolved  problems  in  the  question 
which  married  people  instinctively  avoid — the 


woman  question.  Certain  it  was,  however,  tHat 
she  had  learnt  what  her  husband's  views  were 
on  the  subject  of  her  sex,  and  they  were  so  cyni- 
cally expressed  that  they  must  give  her  mortal 
offence. 

She  did  not  say  a  word,  but  he  saw  in  her 
face  that  now  all  chance  of  peace  was  gone  and 
that  this  woman  would  never  rest  till  she  had 
destroyed  his  marriage  and  compelled  him  to 
shorten  his  life.  Against  this  he  could  only 
oppose  his  motto:  "Be  ready  for  everything," 
and  resolve  to  bear  everything  as  long  as  possible, 
and  finally  when  nothing  else  remained,  to  go 
his  own  way.  Then  she  would  devour  herself  in 
solitude  for  want  of  food  for  her  hate. 

The  next  day  she  had  hatched  her  egg,  which 
proved  to  contain  a  basilisk. 

With  an  air  which  would  fain  have  seemed 
innocent,  but  did  not,  she  told  him,  that  since 
he  could  not  work,  they  must  think  of  re- 
trenching. 

'Very  well,"  he  answered. 

First  of  all  they  had  to  content  themselves  with 
one  room.  This  meant  that  all  possibility  of 
being  his  own  master,  of  withdrawing  himself, 
and  of  collecting  himself  was  precluded.  For  the 
future  he  would  be  confined  with  his  tormentress 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     126 

in  the  same  cage,  have  no  more  power  over  his 
own  thoughts  and  inclinations,  and  above  all, 
not  be  able  to  work  at  the  "  Last  Judgment." 

'You  know  you  cannot  work!'"  she  re- 
marked. 

When  midday  came,  a  plate  with  some  cold 
bacon  and  bread  was  set  before  him. 

'  You  don't  like  soup,"  she  said;  "and  hot 
food  isn't  nice  in  this  heat." 

Then  she  sat  down  to  watch  him. 

'  Won't  you  eat?  "  he  asked. 

"No,  I  am  not  hungry,"  she  answered,  and 
continued  to  watch  him. 

Then  he  stood  up,  took  his  hat,  and  prepared 
to  go  out. 

'  Are  you  going  out?  "  she  asked;  "  then  I 
will  go  too,  and  we  will  keep  each  other  com- 
pany." 

He  went  forward  with  long  strides  and  she 
followed  him.  In  order  to  vex  her  he  chose  the 
sunny  side  of  the  street  by  a  long  white  wall, 
where  the  heat  was  intense,  and  the  reflected 
light  blinded  the  eyes.  Then  he  dragged  her  out 
to  Chelsea,  where  there  was  no  house  that  could 
give  shade. 

She  followed  like  an  evil  spirit. 

When  they  came  to  the  river,  he  thought  for 
a.  moment  of  pushing  her  into  the  water,  but  did 


126    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STEAND 

not.  He  went  along  the  bank  where  lime-ships 
unloaded,  steam-cranes  puffed  out  coal-smoke, 
and  chains  hindered  their  walking.  He  hoped 
that  she  would  fall  and  hurt  herself,  or  be  pushed 
down  by  a  workman,  and  wished  that  a  coal- 
heaver  would  embrace  and  kiss  her — so  bound- 
less was  his  hate  and  hers. 

It  was  in  vain  that  he  mounted  over  barrels 
and  wheel-barrows  and  threaded  his  way  through 
heaps  of  lime.  He  thought  of  jumping  into  the 
river  and  swimming  to  the  other  side,  but  was 
withheld  by  the  thought  that  she  perhaps  could 
swim  also. 

At  last  he  made  a  wide  circuit  like  an  ox 
persecuted  by  a  gadfly,  and  went  down  to  West- 
minster. There  the  back  streets  swarmed  with 
the  .strangest  figures,  like  shapes  seen  in  a  night- 
mare. He  entered  the  abbey,  as  if  to  shake  off 
a  pest,  but  she  followed,  silent  and  unweariable. 

Finally  he  had  to  return  home,  and  when  he  got 
there,  he  sat  down  on  one  chair,  and  she  seated 
herself  opposite  him. 

Then  he  understood  how  a  man  can  become 
a  murderer,  and  determined  to  fly,  as  soon  as  he 
had  written  for  money. 

The  night  came,  and  he  hoped  now  to  be  able 
to  collect  his  thoughts,  and  be  master  of  himself. 

She    pretended  to  be  asleep,  but  he   could 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     127 

tell  by  her  breathing  that  she  did  not  really 
sleep. 

"Are  you  awake?  "  she  asked. 

He  was  still  unwise  enough  to  answer  "  Yes." 
Now  they  lay  there  watching  which  should  first 
go  to  sleep.  At  last  he  did  so. 

In  the  middle  of  the  night  he  awoke,  listened, 
and  heard  by  her  breathing  that  she  was  asleep. 

Then  his  soul  stretched  itself,  wrapped  itself 
up  in  the  darkness,  and  enjoyed  being  able  to 
think  without  being  watched  by  those  cold, 
threatening  eyes. 

She  had  not,  however,  really  gone  to  sleep, 
but  in  the  darkness  he  heard  her  voice  as  before  : 
' '  Are  you  asleep  ?  ' : 

He  felt  the  vampire  which  had  fastened  on  to 
his  soul  and  kept  watch  even  over  his  thoughts. 
Why  did  she  spy  on  him  except  that  she  feared 
the  silent  workings  of  his  mind?  She  felt  perhaps 
how  he  lay  there,  and  worked  himself  gradually 
out  of  the  meshes  of  her  net.  He  only  needed  a 
few  hours'  quiet,  but  that  he  was  not  to  have. 
So  she  denied  herself  sleep  in  order  to  torment 
him.  She  would  not  allow  herself  the  pleasure 
of  going  to  the  city,  or  of  visiting  the  libraries 
and  museums,  because  she  did  not  wish  to  leave 
him  alone.  The  next  day  he  asked  her  whether 
she  wished  to  continue  to  translate  his  works. 


128    FAIR   HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

or  whether  he  should  have  recourse  again  to  his 
old  translators.' 

' '  Shall  I  translate  you  ?  ' '  she  said  contemp- 
tuously. '  There  are  better  writers  to  be  done." 

'  Why  will  you  not  rather  translate  me  than 
your  rubbishy  authors?  5: 

'  Take  care  !  "  she  hissed.  "  You  over-value 
yourself  and  a  terrible  awakening  awaits  you 
from  the  dream  of  your  imagined  greatness." 

She  said  that  in  a  tone  as  if  she  were  supported 
by  the  public  opinion  of  all  Europe.  That  made 
a  certain  impression  on  him,  for  an  author,  even 
when  recognised,  often  seems  nothing  to  himself 
but  is  entirely  dependent  on  the  opinion  others 
cherish  regarding  his  talents.  Now  he  felt  the 
bond  between  them  snap.  She  hated  and  de- 
spised his  work,  which  was  his  only  means  of 
support,  and  when  she  sought  to  rob  him  of 
courage  and  confidence,  she  was  the  enemy. 
And  in  dealing  with  an  enemy  there  are  only  two 
methods — either  to  kill  him,  or  not  to  fight  him 
but  to  fly.  He  determined  on  the  latter. 

He  had  still  to  wait  a  few  days  till  the  money 
came,  and  these  days  were  enough  to  develop  his 
aversion.  He  had  opportunities  of  witnessing 
more  cold,  calculating  malice,  mischievous  joy 
at  successful  thrusts,  all  the  feminine  small- 
mindedness,  meanness,  and  duplicity,  but  on  a. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     129 

larger  scale.  Since  she  knew  that  he  could  not 
get  away  for  want  of  money,  she  gave  him  to 
understand  that  he  was  her  prisoner ;  but  he  was 
not,  however. 

The  room  looked  like  a  pigsty,  and  the  meals 
were  so  prepared  as  to  be  purposely  repulsive. 
Dirt  and  disorder  prevailed  to  such  a  degree  that 
he  felt  himself  in  hell.  With  longing  he  thought 
of  his  lonely  attic  which  had  always  been  tidy, 
however  careless  he  had  been  about  expenses. 

Two  months  had  passed  since  their  marriage. 
All  smiles  and  even  conversation  had  ceased; 
love  was  changed  into  unreasoning  hate,  and  he 
began  to  find  her  ugly. 

On  the  last  day  before  his  departure,  he  felt 
obliged  to  speak  out  in  order  not  to  explode. 
'  You  were  beautiful  as  long  as  I  loved  you; 
perhaps  my  love  made  you  so,  not  only  in  my 
opinion.  Now  I  find  you  the  ugliest  and  meanest 
character  which  I  have  met  in  my  life." 

She  answered:  "I  know  that  I  have  never 
been  so  malicious  towards  anyone  as  towards 
you,  without  being  able  to  give  any  reasons  for 
it." 

'I  can,  though,"  he  said.      'You  hate  me 
because  I  am  a  man,  and  your  husband." 

He  had  packed  his  portmanteau  and  she  was 
prepared  for  his  departure.  When  now  the  time 

I 


130    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

of  separation  approached  and  she  believed  it 
would  be  for  ever,  her  hatred  vanished,  and 
behold  !  love  was  there  again ! 

Her  tenderness  and  care  for  him  knew  no 
bounds.  They  spoke  of  the  future  as  though 
they  would  soon  meet  again.  She  gave  him  good 
advice  in  a  motherly  way,  but  resignedly,  as 
if  in  face  of  an  unalterable  destiny  which 
demanded  their  temporary  separation.  As  they 
drove  to  the  station  in  an  open  carriage,  she 
kissed  him  repeatedly  in  broad  daylight  in  the 
main  streets.  The  passers-by  laughed,  but  when 
the  police  began  to  look  attentively  at  the  caress- 
ing pair,  he  felt  the  need  of  caution. 

"Take  care,"  he  said,  "  in  this  country  we 
might  be  imprisoned  for  making  love  openly." 
'What  do  I  care  for  that?"  she  answered. 
"  I  love  you  so  much." 

He  thought  her  again  sublime  in  her  all-defying 
tenderness,  and  they  planned  to  meet  again  in 
a  week.  His  intention  was  to  go  to  his  colleague 
Ilmarinen  in  the  Island  of  Riigen.  The  latter 
would  help  him  to  order  his  affairs ;  then  he  would 
rent  a  house  and  they  would  meet  again  in  a 
fortnight  at  latest. 

' '  You  see  now,  one  cannot  trust  in  the  per- 
manence of  this  hatred." 

"No,  one  must  trust  love," 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     131 

"  It  looks  as  if  that  had  conquered." 
Their  parting  at  the  station  was  heart-rending, 
and,  as  he  sat  alone  in  the  railway  carriage,  he 
felt  the  pain  of  longing  for  her.  He  did  not  find 
the  sense  of  freedom  and  happiness  of  which  he 
had  dreamt.  All  the  recollections  of  her  malice 
seemed  to  have  been  obliterated. 


IV 

He  went  from  London  to  Hamburg  in  the  hope 
of  finding  acquaintances  on  his  arrival  who 
would  help  him  on  to  Riigen.  But  he  found  the 
place  as  though  under  a  spell  of  enchantment; 
everyone  had  gone  to  the  country  or  somewhere 
else.  He  had  to  take  a  room  in  an  hotel  and 
telegraph  first  to  Ilmarinen  in  Riigen,  but  the 
latter  answered  that  he  had  no  money.  Then  he 
telegraphed  to  Copenhagen  and  Christiania  and 
received  similar  answers. 

He  felt  now  as  fh'ough  he  had  been  enticed 
into  a  trap  and  overpowered.  Since  there  had 
been  an  outbreak  of  cholera  the  previous  year 
in  Hamburg,  they  expected  another  when  the 
heat  returned,  and  that  was  the  case  just  now. 
Therefore,  if  he  did  not  get  away  soon,  he  had 


132    FAIR   HAVEN   AND   FOUL    STRAND 

to  expect,  not  death,  to  which  he  felt  indifferent, 
but  the  quarantine. 

The  days  passed  slowly  with  terrible  monotony, 
for  he  had  no  one  to  talk  to,  and  with  the 
threatened  cholera  outbreak  hanging  over  his 
head.  Helpless  and  in  a  perpetual  rage  against 
some  invisible  foe  who  seemed  to  have  a  grudge 
against  him,  he  felt  paralysed.  He  dared  not 
move  a  finger  in  order  to  alter  his  destiny,  for  he 
feared  failure  and  renewed  disappointment  of 
his  hopes. 

In  order  to  pass  the  time  he  studied  historical 
tables  and  wrote  dates  from  morning  to  evening. 
But  the  days  were  still  terribly  long,  and  after 
four  days  he  conceived  a  fixed  idea  that  he  would 
never  get  away  from  this  infernal  town  where 
nothing  but  buying  and  selling  went  on.  This 
impression  became  so  strong  that  he  determined 
to  end  his  life  in  his  uncanny  bedroom.  He 
unpacked  his  things  and  put  out  the  photographs 
of  his  children  and  other  relatives  on  the  writing- 
table. 

Loneliness  and  torment  made  the  time  seem 
double  its  real  length.  He  began  to  be  under  the 
illusion  that  he  was  a  native  of  Hamburg;  he 
forgot  for  a  while  his  past  and  the  fact  that  he 
was  married  or  had  lived  anywhere  else  than 
here.  He  regarded  himself  as  a  prisoner  with 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    133 

the  weird  feeling  that  he  did  not  know  what  crime 
he  had  committed,  who  had  condemned  him,  or 
who  was  his  jailer.  But  the  black  spectre  of 
cholera  haunted  invisibly  the  dirty  water  of  the 
canals  and  watched  for  him.  Three  times  a  day 
he  asked  the  waiter  about  the  cholera  and  always 
received  the  same  answer:  "  They  are  not  sure 
yet." 

Then  at  last  came  a  letter  from  his  wife.  She 
cried  aloud  from  longing,  fear,  and  unrest,  and 
wished  to  know  where  he  was.  He  answered  in 
the  same  tone  and  felt  wild  with  rage  at  the 
destiny  which  separated  them. 

On  the  morning  of  the  fifth  day  he  discovered 
in  a  newspaper  that  his  Danish  friend  lived  only 
half  an  hour's  journey  by  rail  from  Hamburg. 

If  he  had  known  that  before,  he  would  not 
have  been  obliged  to  undergo  all  these  sufferings. 
Now,  since  he  could  not  pay  the  hotel  bill,  he 
resolved  to  depart  at  once  and  not  to  return. 
His  friend  would  give  him  money  which  he  would 
send  to  the  hotel,  and  he  would  have  his  things 
sent  after  him.  He  took  his  seat  in  the  railway 
carriage  with  the  feelings  of  a  liberated  prisoner, 
cast  a  pitying  look  on  Hamburg  and  forgave  the 
injuries  it  had  done  him,  but  vowed  never  to 
honour  it  with  another  visit,  unless  compelled. 

His  half -hour's  journey  put  him  in  a  good 


134    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

humour,  and  his  mouth  watered  at  the  prospect 
of  being  able  to  give  expression  to  all  his 
vexation  and  perhaps  to  make  light  of  his 
martyrdom,  and  give  it  a  comic  aspect.  His 
divine  frivolity  returned,  and  he  thought  that 
he  must  be  after  all  a  lucky  fellow  to  find  one  of 
his  friends  so  unexpectedly.  He  stopped  before 
the  comfortable  little  house;  the  landlord  stood 
in  the  doorway;  he  greeted  him  and  asked  if 
Mr were  at  home. 

"  No;  he  went  off  this  morning." 

"Where?" 

"To  Denmark." 

During  the  three  hours  which  he  had  to  wait 
for  the  train  he  had  time  to  get  over  the  blow. 
When  he  took  his  seat  again  in  the  train,  he 
thought :  ' '  There  is  something  wrong  here ;  it  is 
not  the  natural  logic  of  events.  It  is  certainly 
something  else." 

Then  the  spires  of  Hamburg  reappeared  and 
his  hatred  to  the  place  awoke  again,  and  rose 
to  an  incredible  height  when  he  saw  a  coffin  at 
the  station.  '  Now  the  cholera  is  here,"  he 
thought,  ' '  and  I  shall  be  in  quarantine  for  four- 
teen days!  " 

But  it  was  not  the  cholera,  which  was  some- 
thing to  be  thankful  for.  He  did  not  feel  so, 
however,  for  he  felt  sure  it  would  break  out  on 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     135 

the  same  day  that  he  received  the  money.  And 
he  calculated  that  he  would  never  get  away  from 
Hamburg  in  this  way.  The  money  would  delay 
so  long  till  the  hotel  bill,  which  grew  in  geo- 
metrical progression,  swallowed  up  the  whole 
amount,  and  nothing  would  be  left  for  his 
travelling  expenses.  In  this  way  there  would 
be  a  sort  of  perpetual  movement  which  might 
last  till  the  end  of  the  world. 

That  his  calculations  were  about  correct  was 
proved  two  days  later  when  the  money  really 
came.  He  paid  the  bill,  left  the  hotel  in  a  cab, 
and  drove  to  the  station;  then  a  hotel  servant 
who  had  followed  him  expected  a  tip,  and  had, 
besides,  a  little  additional  bill,  probably  falsified, 
as  usual.  When  he  came  to  the  booking-office 
and  inquired  the  price  of  the  ticket,  he  was  two 
marks  short.  Accordingly  he  returned  to  the 
hotel. 

It  is  not  necessary  to  linger  over  details  in 
order  to  give  the  reader  a  lively  idea  of  what  he 
suffered.  In  short,  his  silence  cure  still  lasted 
some  days;  then  he  got  away,  and  the  cholera 
had  not  yet  broken  out. 

His  object  in  going  to  Riigen  was  partly  to  seek 
masculine  society  in  order  to  get  rid  of  the 
feminine  atmosphere  which  had  enveloped  him, 


136    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

and  partly  to  settle  matters  with  Ilmarinen;  but 
his  chief  purpose  was  probably  to  talk  himself 
out.  That  was  precisely  why,  he  thought,  destiny 
or  whatever  it  was  had  relegated  him  to  absolute 
silence  in  Hamburg,  for  'destiny"  always 
sought  out  his  secret  wishes  in  order  to  frus- 
trate them. 

When  at  last  he  reached  Riigen,  hoping  to 
have  a  good  talk  for  half  a  night,  he  found 
Ilmarinen  altered,  chilly  in  demeanour  and 
embarrassed.  The  latter  had  heard  that  his  friend 
had  married  a  lady  from  a  rich  family,  as  indeed 
was  the  fact,  and  therefore  could  not  understand 
this  sudden  come  down.  When  the  new-comer 
asked  whether  they  could  have  supper  together, 
the  Finn  excused  himself  by  saying  that  he  had 
been  invited  to  a  birthday  feast. 

"I  live,  you  know,"  he  said,  "with  Lais's 
oldest  friend,  the  Swede,  who  was  in  love  with 
her,  and  who  came  last." 

"Is/iehere?" 

'  Yes,  he  lives  here,  since  Lais  engaged  her- 
self to  the  Russian  who  left  his  wife  and 
children." 

'  *  He  hates  me  then  also  ?  ' ' 
'  Yes,  to  speak  the  truth,  your  presence  will 
certainly  annoy  him." 

So  he  remained  alone  the  first  evening.    Alone 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    137 

after  a  long  double  loneliness  with  his  wife  and 
with  himself ! 

He  felt  as  though  he  were  under  some  curse, 
to  be  so  treated  by  this  insignificant,  uncultivated 
Ilmarinen  whom  he  had  lifted  up  from  nothing- 
ness, introduced  to  his  own  circle,  fed  and  lodged, 
because  he  executed  business  matters  for  him 
with  the  theatres  and  publishers.  This  employ- 
ment was  partly  an  honour  for  the  young 
unknown  author,  and  partly  an  advantage,  for 
it  helped  him  to  find  openings  for  his  own  work. 
Now  the  pupil  abandoned  the  teacher,  because 
he  thought  there  was  nothing  more  to  be  gained 
from  him,  and  because  he  considered  he  could 
now  help  himself. 

The  days  which  followed  were  now  so  dreadful, 
that  again  the  thought  occurred  to  him  that  this 
could  not  be  natural,  but  that  a  black  hand  was 
guiding  his  destiny. 

Since  there  was  only  one  restaurant  in  this 
third-class  watering-place,  he  had  to  sit  at  the 
same  table  with  his  countryman,  who  attributed 
to  him  the  loss  of  Lais,  and  with  Ilmarinen,  who 
assumed  a  superior  tone,  because  he  regarded  him 
as  lost.  Then  the  food  resembled  hog's  flesh  from 
which  all  the  goodness  had  been  cooked  out. 
One  rose  hungry  from  table,  and  was  hungry  the 
whole  day.  Everything  was  adulterated,  even  the 


138    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

beer.  As  regards  the  meat,  the  restaurant 
keeper's  family  first  cooked  all  the  goodness  out 
of  it  for  themselves;  the  customers  only  got  the 
sinews  and  bones,  and  were  fed,  in  fact,,  just 
like  dogs.  Bitter  looks,  which  his  unfortunate 
fellow-countryman  could  not  quite  suppress,  did 
not  increase  the  imaginary  pleasures  of  the  table. 

He  spent  a  week  in  Riigen  without  hearing  any- 
thing from  his  wife  in  London.  At  hrst  he  had 
found  life  on  the  island  tolerable  in  contrast  to 
that  in  the  Hamburg  hotel;  but  when  he  woke 
one  day  and  reflected  on  his  situation,  it  seemed 
to  him  simply  hellish.  He  had  hired  an  attic 
room  and  the  sun  beat  fiercely  on  the  iron  plates 
of  the  roof,  which  was  only  a  foot  above  his  head. 
Sixteen  years  previously  he  had,  as  a  young 
bachelor,  left  his  garret  at  the  top  of  five  flighis 
of  stairs,  in  order  to  enter  a  house  as  a  married 
man.  Since  that  time  it  had  been  one  of  his 
nightmares  to  find  himself  crawling  up  the  five 
flights  of  stairs  to  his  old  garret,  where  all  the 
wretchedness  and  untidiness  of  a  bachelor's  room 
awaited  him.  Now  he  was  again  in  an  attic  and 
a  bachelor,  although  married.  That  was  like  a 
punishment  after  receiving  warnings.  But  what 
crime  he  had  committed  he  could  not  say. 

Moreover,  the  whole  surrounding  soil  con- 
sisted of  light,  loose  sand,  which  had  been  so 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND     139 

heated  by  the  suns  of  midsummer  that  it  did  not 
become  cool  at  night.  It  made  one  think  at  first 
of  the  hot  sand-girdles  which  peasants  use  to 
cure  inflammation  of  the  lungs.  Later  on,  after, 
searching  in  his  memory,  he  thought  of  the  scene 
in  Dante's  Inferno  where  the  blasphemers  lie 
stretched  out  on  hot  sand.  But  as  he  did  not 
think  he  believed  in  any  good  God,  it  seemed  to 
him  that  blasphemies  might  be  left  unpunished. 

After  walking  about  for  a  week  in  the  deep 
sand,  it  seemed  to  him  really  a  hellish  torture  to 
have  to  take  half  a  step  backward  for  every  one 
forward,  and  to  be  obliged  to  lift  the  foot  six 
inches  high  in  walking.  Worst  of  all  was  the 
feeling  of  sinking  through  the  earth  like  the  girl 
in  the  fairy  story  who  trod  on  bread.  Never  to 
find  a  firm  foothold,  nor  to  be  able  to  run  a  race 
with  one's  thoughts,  but  to  drag  oneself  about 
like  an  old  man — that  was  hell.  Besides  this, 
there  was  a  heat  in  the  air  which  never  abated. 
His  attic  was  burning  hot  by  day,  and  when  he 
lay  in  bed  at  night  with  nothing  on,  he  was 
scorched  by  the  iron  plates  of  the  roof.  The 
nearness  of  the  sea  would  naturally  have  helped 
to  relieve  the  heat,  but  that  possibility  had  been 
carefully  guarded  against,  like  everything  else. 
From  his  boyhood  he  had  been  accustomed  to 
cast  himself  head  foremost  into  the  water  because 


140    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

he  did  not  like  creeping  into  it.  In  connection 
with  this  also,  he  was  persecuted  by  a  frequently 
recurring  nightmare,  i.e.  he  used  to  dream  that 
he  was  overheated  and  must  plunge  into  the  sea. 
The  sea  was  there  but  was  so  shallow  that  he 
could  not  plunge  into  it,  and  when  he  did  crawl 
into  it,  it  was  still  so  shallow  that  he  could  not 
duck  his  head.  That  was  precisely  the  case  here. 
' '  Have  I  come  here  for  the  fulfilment  of  all  my 
bad  dreams?  "  he  asked  himself. 

And  with  reason.  Ilmarinen  grew  more 
inquisitive  every  day;  he  asked  when  the 
Norwegian's  wife  was  coming,  and  when  a  fort- 
night had  passed,  believed  that  she  had  quite 
abandoned  him.  This,  naturally,  pleased  Lais' s 
friend,  and  nothing  was  wanting  to  complete  the 
Norwegian's  hell.  For  there  was  something 
very  humiliating  in  his  position  as  a  discarded 
husband.  His  correspondence  with  England  had 
assumed  such  an  ominous  character  that  he  did 
not  know  himself  whether  he  was  still  married 
or  separated.  In  one  of  his  wife's  letters,  she 
dwelt  on  her  inextinguishable  love,  the  pain  of 
separation,  and  the  martyrdom  of  longing. 
They  were,  she  said,  Hero  and  Leander  on 
opposite  sides  of  the  sea,  and  if  she  could  swim, 
she  would  fly  to  her  Leander,  even  at  the  risk 
of  being  washed  up  on  his  island  a  corpse.  In 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAX1)     141 

her  next  letter  she  announced  that  she  intended 
opening  a  theatre  in  London,  and  was  trying  to 
raise  sufficient  capital.  At  the  same  time  she 
could  not  find  enough  capital  to  buy  a  steamer- 
ticket.  A  third  letter  contained  the  news  that  she 
was  ill,  and  was  full  of  complaints  that  the 
husband  had  left  his  sick  wife  in  a  foreign  land. 
A  fourth  letter  said  that  she  was  in  a  convent 
kept  by  English  ladies,  where  she  had  been 
educated,  and  where  she  found  again  her  youth 
and  innocence;  in  it  she  also  denounced  the 
wickedness  of  the  world  and  the  hell  of 
marriage. 

It  was  impossible  to  give  reasonable  answers 
to  these  letters,  for  they  poured  on  him  like  hail 
and  crossed  his  own.  If  he  wrote  a  gentle  reply 
he  received  a  scolding  letter  in  answer  to  a  pre- 
vious sharp  one  of  his,  and  vice  versa.  Their 
misunderstandings  arrived  at  such  a  pitch  that 
they  bordered  on  lunacy,  and  when  he  ceased  to 
write,  she  began  to  send  telegrams. 

This  imbroglio  lasted  for  a  month,  and  during 
that  time  he  looked  back  with  longing  to  the 
hours  he  had  spent  in  Hamburg ;  they  seemed  to 
him  like  memories  of  an  indescribably  happy  time 
when  compared  with  this. 

At  last  he  was  cut  down  from  the  gallows.  A 
letter  came  from  his  sister-in-law  inviting  him  to 


142    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

his  father-in-law's  villa  at  Odense.  His  wife  had 
also  been  invited;  and  it  was  arranged  that  they 
should  meet  again  there. 


Prepared  for  everything,  even  the  worst,  he 
entered  on  this  new  stage  of  running  the  gauntlet. 
The  most  curious  of  all  his  changes  awaited  him. 
After  having  been  a  husband  and  father  he  was 
to  become  a  child  again,  be  incorporated  into  a 
family,  and  find  another  father  and  mother  many 
years  after  losing  his  own.  The  situation  was 
rendered  more  confused  by  the  fact  that  his 
father  and  mother-in-law  had  lived  separate  for 
seven  years,  and  now  wished  to  come  together 
again  on  the  occasion  of  their  daughter's 
marriage. 

He  had  thus  become  a  bond  of  union  between 
them,  and  since  the  daughter  had  also  been  at 
variance  with  her  father,  the  family  meeting 
promised  to  take  the  shape  of  a  manifold  recon- 
ciliation. 

But  his  own  past  was  not  exactly  associated 
with  family  reconciliations,  and  since  he  himself 
had  not  a  clean  record  the  prospective  idyll  by 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     143 

the  Areskov  Lake  began  to  loom  before  him  like 
a  cave  of  snakes.  How  was  he  to  explain  this 
strange  parting  from  his  bride  after  only  eight 
weeks  of  marriage  ?  To  allege  pecuniary  embar- 
rassment would  be  the  worst  of  all  excuses, 
because  a  son-in-law  with  money  difficulties  would 
be  regarded  as  an  impostor  or  a  legacy-hunter. 

As  he  approached  the  meeting-place,  he 
became  nervous,  but  at  the  last  hour  he  saved 
his  courage,  as  usual,  by  reverting  to  the  stand- 
point of  the  author  :  "  If  I  get  no  honour  thereby, 
I  will  at  any  rate  get  material  for  a  chapter  in 
my  novel." 

He  also  regarded  what  happened  to  him  from 
another  point  of  view — that  of  the  innocent 
martyr.  "  I  will  see  how  far  Destiny  can  go  in 
its  meanness,  and  how  much  I  can  bear."  When 
the  train  stopped  at  the  pretty  little  branch-line 
station,  he  looked  out,  naturally  enough,  for 
faces  which  sought  his  own.  A  young  lady 
leading  a  delicate-looking  child  by  the  hand 
approached,  asked  his  name,  and  introduced  her- 
self as  his  father-in-law's  French  governess.  She 
had  been  sent,  she  said,  to  meet  him. 

A  pretty  white  village  whose  houses  had  high, 
tent-like  roofs  and  green  shutters  lay  in  a  valley 
surrounded  by  small  hills,  and  enclosing  a 
beautiful  lake,  on  the  bank  of  which,  outside  the 


144    FAIR,   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

village,  stood  his  father-in-law's  house.  On  the 
road  under  the  lime-trees  a  bare-headed,  white- 
haired  lady  met  him,  embraced  him  and  bade 
him  welcome.  It  was  his  wife's  mother.  He  was 
immediately  conscious  what  a  strange  trans- 
mission of  feelings  such  a  simple  transaction  as 
marriage  had  seemed  to  him,  might  bring  about. 
She  was  his  mother  and  he  was  her  son. 

'  I  have  known  you  long  before  you  saw  my 
daughter,"  said  the  old  lady,  with  the  quavering 
voice  of  a  religious  fanatic.  ' '  And  it  is  as  though 
I  had  expected  you.  There  is  much  evil  in  your 
writings,  but  your  immorality  is  childish,  your 
views  of  women  are  correct,  and  your  godlessness 
is  not  your  fault  for  He  did  not  wish  to  make  your 
acquaintance,  but  now  you  will  soon  see  Him 
come.  You  have  married  a  child  of  the  world, 
but  you  will  not  long  remain  with  her  when  you 
see  how  she  pulls  you  down  into  the  trivialities 
of  life.  When  you  find  yourself  alone,  you  will 
re-discover  the  first  vocation  of  your  youth." 

This  she  said  in  the  solemn  and  unembarrassed 
manner  of  a  sibyl,  as  though  someone  else  spoke 
through  her  and  therefore  she  did  not  fear  to 
have  said  too  much. 

When  the  conversation  returned  to  mundane 
things,  he  asked  after  his  father-in-law,  whose 
absence  surprised  him.  She  answered  that  he 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     145 

was  not  here,  but  would  come  to-morrow.  His 
sister-in-law  now  appeared  but  she  was  chilly, 
gloomy  and  conventional  in  demeanour.  He  had 
thought  her  his  friend  and  had  hoped  to  find  a 
support  in  her  presence,  but  perceived  now  that 
that  hope  was  vain,  especially  as  she  was  going 
to  leave  before  her  father  came.  Nothing  more 
was  said  about  his  own  wife,  and  no  one  knew 
whether  she  was  coming  or  not. 

Had  he  been  enticed  into  a  trap?  he  asked 
himself,  and  was  a  court  martial  about  to  be 
held  here?  Had  his  wife  written  complaints 
against  him  from  England?  How  was  he  to 
interpret  the  situation?  A  mother-in-law  who 
almost  advised  him  to  be  divorced,  and  spoke  ill 
of  her  child — that  was  something  very  original ! 

Meanwhile  he  was  conducted  into  the  villa. 
It  was  a  handsome  stone  building  of  two  stories, 
with  many  large  rooms  filled  with  ancient 
furniture,  tapestries,  and  ornaments.  And  this 
house,  which  could  easily  contain  two  large 
families,  was  occupied  for  only  six  weeks  in  the 
year  by  the  owner  during  his  holidays;  the  rest 
of  the  time  it  stood  empty.  This  suggested 
wealth,  and  gave  the  son-in-law  the  impression 
that  here,  at  any  rate,  one  need  not  discuss 
poverty — its  causes  and  its  cure. 

The  day  passed  in  conversation  with  his  mother- 

E 


146    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

in-law,  who  was  unwearied  in  showing  him 
attention  and  kindness.  She  was  inclined  on 
every  occasion  to  lead  the  conversation  to  high 
subjects;  as  a  religious  mystic  she  was  disposed 
to  see  the  guiding  hand  of  Providence  every- 
where. That  led  her  to  look  at  things  in  general 
from  a  tolerant  point  of  view,  since  she  regards 
people's  actions  as  predestined. 

In  order  to  make  himself  agreeable  in  the  most 
usual  way  he  placed  himself  at  her  point  of  view 
and  searched  in  his  past  for  some  premonitions 
of  coming  events. 

"  Yes,"  answered  the  old  lady,  "  I  said  already 
that  I  had  expected  you ;  one  of  those  wild  North- 
men was  to  come  and  take  my  daughter.  But 
as  you  can  guess,  my  husband  was  not  delighted 
at  the  prospect;  he  has  a  very  violent  temper 
but  is  good  at  heart.  You  will  have  a  hard  tussle 
with  him  at  first,  but  it  will  soon  be  over,  if  only 
you  do  not  answer  him.  It  is  certainly  fortunate 
that  your  wife  has  not  come,  for  he  has  a  bone 
to  pick  with  her  also." 

"Also?" 

"  I  don't  mean  anything  bad;  don't  misunder- 
stand me.  It  will  be  all  right  when  his  angry 
fit  is  over." 

"He  will  be  angry  then,  anyhow,  but  I  don't 
understand  why.  I  have  acted  in  good  faith,  but 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     147 

every  man  may  sometimes  fairly  plead  unmerited 
misfortune." 

"Oh,  it  will  be  all  right!  " 

At  last  the  evening  ended  and  he  went  up  to 
his  room.  It  had  windows  on  three  sides;  there 
were  no  outer  blinds  and  the  curtains  could 
not  be  drawn  together.  He  felt  himself  under 
observation,  like  a  patient  in  quarantine. 

When  he  lay  in  bed  he  had  his  father-in-law's 
bust  to  contemplate;  the  face  did  not  look 
friendly  but  quite  the  reverse,  and  being  lit  from 
below,  it  assumed  all  manner  of  unpleasing 
expressions. 

' '  And  to-morrow  I  am  to  be  lectured  by  this 
stranger  who  I  have  never  seen;  scolded  like 
a  schoolboy  because  I  have  had  misfortunes. 
Well,  I  must  put  up  with  it,  as  with  everything 
else." 

The  next  morning  he  woke  up  with  a  distinct 
impression  that  he  found  himself  in  a  pit  of 
snakes,  into  which  Satan  had  enticed  him.  There- 
fore it  was  impossible  to  flee,  so  he  went  out  to 
botanise  and  survey  the  landscape.  He  screwed 
himself  up  into  a  frivolous,  poetic  mood  and 
thought  what  a  thrilling  situation  it  was;  a 
dramatic  scene  which  no  one  had  hitherto  passed 
through.  'It  is  my  own,"  he  said  to  himself, 
though  it  should  scorch  my  skin." 


148    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

Lunch-time  came ;  it  was  not  exactly  cheerful 
at  table  and  his  father-in-law's  empty  place 
seemed  to  threaten  him.  After  lunch  he  went 
up  to  his  room  to  quiet  his  nerves  and  immediately 
afterwards  the  Councillor's  arrival  was  an- 
nounced. 

The  Norwegian  went  down  smiling,  while 
a  chill  ran  through  him  at  intervals.  In  the 
veranda  stood  a  man  who  looked  about  forty, 
dressed  like  a  young  man,  with  laughing  and 
youthful  eyes.  What  the  Norwegian's  own 
demeanour  was,  he  himself  could  not  see,  but 
it  must  have  made  a  favourable  impression,  for 
his  new  relative  greeted  him  respectfully, 
apologised  for  the  lateness  of  his  arrival,  said 
kind  things  about  his  books,  and  asked  him  to 
sit  down. 

However,  he  always  addressed  him  with 
"you  "  instead  of  the  more  intimate  "  thou." 
Then  he  talked  of  politics ;  he  had  just  come  from 
Fredensborg.  He  spoke  at  length  of  this  and 
that  person,  apparently  with  the  object  of 
observing  his  son-in-law,  who  sat  mute  and 
attentive.  Then  he  turned  to  his  wife,  asked 
if  she  had  anything  to  entertain  their  guest  with, 
and  finally  came  back  to  him,  asking  if  he  wished 
for  anything.  Without  hesitating  he  stood  up, 
went  near  his  father-in-law  and  said :  "  I  have 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    149 

only  one  wish,  that  my  wife's  father  should  call 
me  'thou,'"* 

There  was  a  sudden  gleam  in  the  other's  eyes, 
he  opened  his  arms  and  now  the  doubter  felt  the 
same  as  he  had  when  meeting  his  mother-in-law. 
The  invisible  family-tie  had  been  knit;  he  was 
genuinely  moved,  and  stood  there  transformed 
into  a  child. 

'  You  are  a  good  fellow,"  said  his  father-in- 
law,  "  I  have  looked  into  your  eyes."  Then  he 
kissed  him  on  both  cheeks.  "  But,"  he  continued, 

'  you  have  got  Maria,  and  you  know  what  you 
have  got,  as  I  hear.  Be  good  enough  never  to 
come  and  complain  to  me.  If  you  cannot  tame 
her,  you  must  let  yourself  be  drawn  along  by 
her.  You  have  had  your  way;  much  good  may 
it  do  you !  ' 

Then  they  drank  coft'ee  and  talked  like 
relatives  and  old  acquaintances.  Then  the 
Councillor  went  to  change  his  clothes  in  order  to 
go  fishing.  He  returned  in  a  summer  suit  of 
white  cashmere  which  made  him  look  still  younger 
than  before.  The  trousers  had  certainly  belonged 
to  his  Court  uniform,  and  traces  of  gold  thread 

were   still   visible   upon   them,    but   that   made 

*  Intimate  friends  thus  address  each  other  in  Swedish. 


150    FAIR   HAVEN   AND   FOUL    STRAND 

an  impression  on  the  Bohemian.  Moreover,  his 
father-in-law  offered  him  cigars  which  he  had 
been  presented  with  by  princes. 

The  Councillor  had  dined  at  Court  and  was  now 
going  fishing  with  the  anarchist.  The  latter  felt 
his  conscience  slightly  uneasy  as  he  had  not  long 
previously  admired  the  cleverness  of  some  anar- 
chists in  forcing  open  money-safes.  It  was 
strange !  But  the  Councillor  spoke  sympatheti- 
cally of  modern  movements  and  of  Scandinavian 
literature  in  general.  He  was  also  thoroughly 
acquainted  with  the  terrible  activity  of  his  son- 
in-law,  so  that  the  latter  had  no  need  to  feel 
embarrassed.  He  especially  approved  of  his 
views  on  the  woman  question  and  expressed  his 
opinion  thus,  ' '  You  have  written  all  that  I  wished 
to  write." 

He  was  perhaps  not  quite  serious,  but  he  said 
it  at  any  rate. 

Then  they  reached  the  stream. 

''Have  you  ever  fished  for  perch?  "  asked  his 
father-in-law. 

"No,  "he  replied. 

"  Then  you  had  better  help  me." 

The  help  consisted  in  placing  the  fish  in  a 
basket  and  clearing  the  hook  without  injuring 
the  artificial  fly. 

Since  everything  requires  practice,  the   son- 


FAIR    HAYEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    161 

in-law  showed  himself  somewhat  clumsy  and  got 
scolded.  But  he  had  become  so  accustomed  to 
his  new  position  that  he  found  it  quite  natural, 
just  as  natural  as  when  he  used  to  go  fishing 
formerly  with  his  children. 

At  sunset  the  sport  ceased,  and  the  son-in-law 
had  the  honour  of  carrying  the  fishing-rods, 
basket,  and  fish  home. 

The  evening  was  cheerful,  and  the  Councillor 
sent  a  telegram  to  London  with  travelling 
expenses,  telling  the  young  wife  to  -come  at 
once. 

'  That  is  for  your  sake,"  he  said  to  his  son- 
in-law.  In  other  words  she  had  not  been  sent 
for  before,  and  he  had  therefore  been  enticed, 
as  one  captures  singing-birds. 

"  I  have  got  well  over  it,"  he  said  to  his 
mother-in-law  as  he  bade  her  good  night. 

"The  worst  is  over,  but  it  is  not  finished 
yet." 

"  Do  you  think  we  shall  both  get  a  whipping?" 

It  was  not  the  end  yet  by  a  long  way.  The 
next  morning  he  received  a  letter  from  London 
in  which  she  said  farewell  to  him  for  ever  (Lord 
Byron !)  because  in  the  choice  between  her  and 
her  parents,  he  had  preferred  the  latter.  Since 
there  was  no  choice  in  question,  this  was  a  piece 
of  nonsense  which  concealed  something.  Another 


152    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

letter,  addressed  to  her  mother,  was  to  the  same 
effect  but  expressed  more  violently  and  con- 
cluded by  wishing  her  "  good  luck."  Her 
mother  explained  it  thus.  "  She  is  jealous,  fears 
that  you  tell  tales  against  her  and  find  support 
here;  she  is  so  self-willed  that  she  cannot  bear 
even  her  parents  over  her.  If  you  become  good 
friends  with  her  father  and  mother,  she  feels 
herself  in  a  child's  position  with  regard  to  you 
also!" 

This  was  possible  but  not  quite  natural,  for  she 
ought  to  have  rejoiced  that  he  had  made  a  con- 
quest of  her  parents,  and  thus  brought  about  a 
reconciliation  between  her  and  tliem. 

Her  father  became  angry  and  serious;  he 
telegraphed  an  ultimatum  and  demanded  an 
answer.  Now  the  sky  was  clouded  and  there  were 
no  more  smiles.  The  Norwegian  feared  a 
collision  if  he  remained  here,  and  telegraphed  to 
his  wife  :  "  I  am  going  to  Copenhagen ;  if  you  do 
not  come,  I  will  seek  for  a  divorce."  But  he 
had  to  wait  for  an  answer,  and  therefore  he 
remained.  That  night  he  could  not  sleep,  for  the 
situation  was  grotesque  enough  to  drive  one  to 
despair.  Suppose  she  agreed  to  a  divorce,  how 
could  the  family-tie  which  had  just  been  formed 
be  broken  in  a  moment?  What  would  he  be  then, 
who  had  just  entered  into  the  family  and  received 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    153 

their  confidence?  What  would  the  old  people 
think  ?  Such  a  hasty  breach  could  not  take  place 
without  some  reason. 

The  next  morning  a  telegram  came  from  his 
young  wife  who  was  in  Holland.  Since  every- 
thing was  fated  to  go  crazily  this  telegram  was 
so  badly  worded  that  it  might  mean  ' '  I  am  com- 
ing to  you,"  or  "I  am  going  to  Copenhagen  to 
meet  you  there." 

This  telegram  became  a  bone  of  contention, 
and  for  three  whole  days  the  old  pair  and  their 
son-in-law  disputed  over  its  interpretation.  But 
the  young  wife  did  not  come.  They  listened  to 
the  whistles  of  the  steamboats,  went  down  to 
meet  the  trains,  came  back  and  discussed  the 
telegram  again.  They  had  no  more  quiet,  and 
could  not  carry  on  a  conversation  without  turn- 
ing their  heads  and  listening. 

The  next  day  the  father's  patience  was 
exhausted,  for  a  collateral  circumstance  came  in 
view,  of  great  importance  in  his  eyes — the 
unavoidable  scandal.  The  whole  village  knew 
that  the  son-in-law  was  there,  but  that  his  wife 
had  been  lost  and  was  sought  for  by  telegram. 
Her  father  therefore  shut  himself  up  all  day,  and 
when  he  emerged  began  a  ruthless  discussion  of 
the  economic  problem. 

''Have  you  a  sure  income?  "  he  asked. 


154    PAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

11  As  sure  as  authors  generally  have,"  was 
the  answer. 

'  Very  well,  then  you  must  do  like  others,  and 
write  for  the  papers." 

"  No  paper  will  print  my  articles." 
'  Then    write    them    so    that    they    can    be 
printed." 

That  was  more  than  a  sceptic  and  quietist 
ought  to  have  borne,  but  he  bore  it  and  kept 
silence,  firmly  resolved  rather  to  take  a  guitar 
on  his  arm  and  go  about  as  a  wretched  street- 
singer  rather  than  sell  his  soul. 

The  old  man  had  himself  been  a  novelist  and 
poet  in  his  youth,  but  had  been  obliged  to  give 
up  the  struggle  in  order  to  provide  for  his  family. 
He,  therefore,  had  the  right  to  say:  "Do  as  I 
have  had  to  do."  But  on  the  other  side  he  knew 
by  experience  how  hard  such  a  sacrifice  is.  He 
immediately  felt  sympathy  with  his  son-in-law 
and  spoke  friendly,  encouraging  words.  The 
next  moment,  however,  his  justified  suspicions 
awoke,  and  the  memory  of  the  sacrifice  he  had 
once  made  made  him  bitter;  he  felt  he  must 
trample  on  an  unfortunate  who  had  fallen  under 
his  feet.  When  he  saw  how  the  other  kept  silent 
and  took  everything  quietly,  an  evil  spirit 
probably  whispered  to  him  that  this  man  could 
only  bear  everything  so  patiently  because  he 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    155 

hoped  some  day  to  be  heir  in  this  house.  Then 
lie  spoke  of  King  Lear  and  his  ungrateful 
daughters  who  left  the  old  man  alone,  waited 
for  his  death,  and  robbed  him  of  honour.  So 
the  day  passed,  and  when  the  son-in-law  with- 
drew, he  was  sent  for  to  be  whipped  again.  Since 
he  could  put  himself  in  other's  places,  and 
understood  how  to  suffer  with  them,  he  made 
no  attempt  to  defend  himself.  He  could  easily 
imagine  himself  old  and  set  aside,  despised  and 
neglected  by  his  children.  '  You  are  right,"  lie 
said,  "  but  still  I  feel  myself  innocent." 

On  the  evening  of  the  third  day  after  the  dis- 
patch of  the  London  telegram  his  mother-in-law 
came  to  him.  "You  must  go  early  to-morrow 
morning,"  she  said,  "  for  he  cannot  bear  to  see 
you  any  more ! ' : 

"  Very  well,  I  will  go." 
'  And  if  Maria  comes  now,  she  will  not  be 
received." 

' '  Have  you  ever  seen  a  man  in  such  a  position 
as  mine  ? ' J 

"  No ;  my  husband  grants  that  too ;  it  makes 
him  suffer  to  see  such  a  worthy  man  as  you  in  such 
a  position;  he  suffers  on  your  account,  and  he 
does  not  want  to  suffer.  You  know  my  thoughts 
about  it;  it  is  no  one's  fault  and  not  the  fault 
of  circumstances;  but  you  are  fighting  against 


156    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

another  who  pursues  and  pursues  you  till  you  are 
so  weary  that  you  will  be  compelled  to  seek  rest 
in  the  only  place  where  rest  is  to  be  found.  In 
me  you  will  always  have  a  friend,  even  if  you  are 
divorced  from  my  daughter,  and  I  shall  follow 
the  course  of  your  destiny  with  my  good  wishes 
and  my  prayers." 

When  alone  in  his  room,  he  felt  a  certain  relief 
to  think  that  to-morrow  there  would  be  an  end 
of  this  wretchedness  which  was  among  the  worst 
things  he  had  experienced.  In  order  to  think  of 
something  else,  he  took  up  a  paper  which  proved 
to  be  the  official  Court  news.  His  eye  flew  over 
the  first  page  down  to  the  feuilleton,  where  a 
literary  essay  attracted  his  attention.  He  read 
it,  thinking  that  his  father-in-law  had  written  it. 
At  the  first  glance  the  article  showed  great 
familiarity  with  literature,  but  it  contained  over- 
confident judgments  and  was  written  in  too  arti- 
ficial a  style.  Moreover,  it  surprised  him  by 
displaying  hostility  to  all  modern  literature  (in- 
cluding Scandinavian),  while  German  literature 
was  pointed  to  with  special  emphasis  as  that  which 
set  the  tone  to,  and  stood  highest  in  the  civilised 
world.  Germany  always  at  the  head  ! 

When  he  reached  the  end  of  the  article,  he  saw 
that  it  was  signed  by  his  wife !  Now  he  had 
promised  her  never  to  read  her  articles  and  he 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     167 

had  kept  this  promise  in  order  to  avoid  literary 
discussions  in  his  married  life.  The  only  reason 
that  her  written  sentiments  were  different  from 
those  which  she  expressed  in  daily  conversation 
must  be  that  she  had  to  write  so  "in  order  to  be 
printed."  What  a  double  life  this  woman  must 
lead,  appearing  in  Radical  circles  as  an  anarchist, 
and  in  the  Court  paper  as  an  old-fashioned  Con- 
servative !  How  one  could  so  change  about  he 
did  not  understand,  and  he  was  too  tired  to  try 
to  understand  it.  But  that  explained  why  she 
could  not  understand  his  being  without  occupa- 
tion while  there  were  plenty  of  pens  and  paper. 

This  worldly  wisdom,  this  old-fashioned  style 
seemed  to  suggest  a  bald  head  and  spectacles 
rather  than  a  young,  beautiful,  laughing  girl  who 
could  lie  on  a  sofa  and  eat  sweetmeats  like  an 
odalisque. 

'  To  think  that  people  should  be  so  com- 
plicated!  "  he  said  to  himself.  "It  is  inter- 
esting at  any  rate !  I  shall  remember  it  next 
time!'1  And  he  fell  asleep,  thinking  himself 
considerably  wiser  after  these  experiences. 

At  seven  o'clock  he  got  up,  called  by  a  man 
who  was  to  take  his  things  to  the  station.  As  his 
mother-in-law  had  told  him  the  train  did  not  start 
till  nearlv  eight,  he  made  no  hurrv,  but  dressed 

9f  <J  *  *       ' 

quietly  and  went  down  into  the  garden  where  he 


158    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

met  her.  They  were  standing  and  talking  of 
what  lay  before  him  when  a  rough,  thundering 
voice  was  heard  from  a  window  of  the  first  story. 
It  was  his  father-in-law. 

'  Haven't  you  gone  yet?  " 

"No;  the  train  doesn't  go  till  quarter  to 
eight!  " 

"  What  idiot  told  you  that?  " 

That  he  could  not  say,  as  it  was  his  mother-in- 
law. 

'  Well,  hurry  on  to  the  station  and  see  when 
the  next  train  goes." 

As  the  Norwegian  hesitated,  there  came  a  sharp 
'  Now !  "  like  the  crack  of  a  whip  over  a  horse. 
It  was  quite  clear  to  him  what  he  had  to  do  now ; 
he  pressed  his  mother-in-law's  hand  and  went. 
His  firm  steps  must  have  shown  that  they  were 
the  opposite  to  those  leading  to  the  lion's  cave,* 
going  out  and  away  but  never  returning,  for  he 
heard  immediately  the  old  man's  voice  in  a 
caressing,  lamenting  tone  :  "  Axel ! " 

It  felt  like  a  stab  in  the  departer's  breast,  but 
he  had  begun  to  move,  and  went  on  without  look- 
ing round. 

He  went  down  to  the  station,  looked  ostensibly 
at  the  railway  guide,  asked  about  the  next  train 
without  listening  to  the  answer,  saw  by  the  posi- 
*  Vide  Horace, 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     159 

tion  of  the  sun  which  direction  was  north-east, 
and  struck  into  the  nearest  highway.  He  did  this 
all  so  quietly,  as  though  he  had  long  considered 
the  plan.  Soon  he  found  himself  out  in  the 
country,  alone  without  a  home,  without  baggage, 
without  an  overcoat,  and  nothing  but  a  walking- 
stick  in  his  hand.  He  felt  angry  with  no  one ;  hic 
father-in-law  was  right,  and  his  last  call  sounded 
like  an  appeal  for  forgiveness  for  his  bad  temper. 
Yes,  he  only  felt  guilty  with  regard  to  this  man, 
on  whom  he  had  brought  shame  and  sorrow. 
But  in  himself  he  felt  innocent,  for  he  had 
only  acted  according  to  his  obligations  and 
possibilities. 

Meanwhile  he  was  free  and  had  left  the  worst 
hell  behind  him;  the  sun  shone,  the  landscape 
lay  green  and  open,  he  had  the  whole  world  before 
him.  He  shook  off  the  child's  clothes  which  he 
had  worn  for  eight  days,  felt  himself  a  man  again, 
and  marched  on.  His  plan  was  to  reach  a  certain 
place  on  foot;  there  to  take  a  steamer,  to 
telegraph  for  his  baggage  and  so  to  travel  to 
Copenhagen. 

'The  affair  is  really  ludicrous,"  he  said  to 
himself;  "  if  it  were  nQt  tragic  for  the  old  people. 
It  looks  bad,  but  I  have  survived  worse  things. 
I  am  a  tramp !  Very  good !  Then  all  claims  to 
honour  and  respect  have  ceased.  It  is  soothing 


160    FAIR   HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

at  all  events  to  have  nothing  more  to  lose. 
Hurrah!" 

He  marched  into  the  next  village  like  an  old 
soldier  and  ordered  wine  and  tobacco.  He  felt 
hilarious,  and  chatted  with  the  innkeeper.  Then 
he  went  on  again.  But  at  intervals  he  became 
sentimental ;  thought  of  his  mother-in-law's  words 
about  the  wild  chase ;  had  to  admit  that  there  was 
something  uncanny  about  it,  for  he  had  never 
yet  experienced  such  a  misfortune ;  and  if  other 
people  noticed  it,  it  could  not  be  mere  imagi- 
nation. But  that  was  nothing  strange,  for  he  had 
had  bad  luck  ever  since  he  was  a  child.  But 
fancy  placing  a  man  in  such  a  position !  He 
would  not  even  have  treated  an  enemy  with  such 
hellish  cruelty. 

Meanwhile  he  reached  Odense,  came  to  Korsor 
and  soon  afterwards  to  Copenhagen.  It  was 
evening  and  he  sent  a  messenger  to  the  family 
where  his  wife  generally  stayed.  Since  she  had 
not  come  to  the  Arreskov  Lake,  she  must  be  in 
Copenhagen.  On  the  visiting-card  which  he  sent 
he  only  wrote  :  ' '  A  somewhat  strange  question  : 
where  is  my  wife?  ' 

The  man  who  has  not  waited  for  an  hour  and 
a  half  on  a  pavement  does  not  know  how  long 
this  time  can  be.  But  this  interval  of  waiting 
was  abridged  by  the  hope  that  after  a  silence- 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     161 

cure  of  eight  days  in  Hamburg,  five  weeks  of 
simple  imprisonment  at  Riigen,  and  a  week  of  the 
nethermost  hell  at  Fiinen,  he  would  see  his  wife 
again.  After  an  hour  and  a  half  the  messenger 
returned  with  another  visiting-card  on  which  was 
written:  "  She  left  this  morning  for  Fiinen  in 
order  to  meet  you/' 

A  miss  again  !  "  I  begin  to  find  this  monotonous 
even  when  regarded  as  a  plot,''  he  said  to  himself. 

If  one  had  used  it  for  the  plan  of  a  novel,  the 
reader  would  throw  the  book  away  and  exclaim  : 
"  No !  that  is  too  thick !  And  as  a  farce  it  isn't 
cheerful  enough!  " 

Nevertheless,  it  was  a  fact !  The  next  minute 
he  thought :  ' '  My  poor,  unfortunate  wife  is 
going  straight  into  the  lion's  den.  Now  she  will 
get  blows."  For  her  father's  anger  was  now 
unbounded,  and  his  mother-in-law  had  said 
during  the  last  days  of  his  stay  :  "  If  she  comes 
now,  he  will  beat  her."  Therefore  he  tele- 
graphed to  the  old  lady  to  say  that  his  wife  was 
coming,  and  asked  indulgence  for  her. 

It  would  take  four  days  for  her  to  return. 
In  order  not  to  remain  in  Copenhagen  where  his 
wedding  journey  had  been  reported  in  the 
papers,  he  stayed  in  a  village  outside  the  town 
where  an  old  friend  of  his  lived  with  his  family. 

In  the  boarding-house  where  he  stayed  the 

L 


162    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

same  hog's-wash  regime  prevailed  as  in  Riigen. 
In  two  days  he  lost  as  much  strength  as  though 
he  had  had  an  attack  of  typhus.  One  chewed 
till  one's  jaws  were  weary,  went  hungry  to  table, 
and  rose  again  tired  and  hungry. 

His  friend  was  not  the  same  as  before. 
Rendered  melancholy  by  disappointments  he 
seemed  to  find  this  a  favourable  opportunity  to 
display  a  visible  satisfaction  at  seeing  the  well- 
known  author  in  such  a  sorry  plight.  His  sym- 
pathy took  the  heartiest,  and  at  the  same  time 
the  most  insulting  forms.  When  the  Norwegian 
related  his  adventures  on  the  wedding  journey, 
his  hearer  stared  at  him  in  such  a  way  that  he 
made  a  hasty  end  of  his  narrative  in  order  not  to 
be  stigmatised  as  a  liar. 

The  village  was  on  marshy  ground,  and  over- 
shadowed by  very  old  trees;  one  became 
melancholy  there  without  knowing  why.  When 
he  walked  down  one  of  the  streets  of  the  village 
he  was  astonished  to  see  people  at  the  windows 
regarding  him  furtively  with  wild,  distracted 
looks,  and  immediately  afterwards  shyly  hiding 
themselves  behind  the  curtains.  This  disquieted 
him  and  he  wondered  whether  a  false  report  had 
been  spread  that  he  was  mad.  When  he  asked 
his  friend  about  it,  the  latter  answered  :  "  Don't 
you  know  where  you  are?  " 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     163 

The  question  sounded  strangely,  and  might 
mean  :  ' '  Are  you  so  confused  that  you  have  lost 
consciousness?  " 

"I  am  in  X "  he  answered,  in  order  not 

to  betray  his  suspicion. 

"And  don't  you  know  what  X — —  is?  ' 

"No!" 

"  It  is  simply  a  lunatic  asylum ;  the  inhabitants 
make  a  living  by  taking  care  of  mad  people." 
And  he  laughed. 

The  Norwegian  inquired  no  further,  but  he 
asked  himself:  "  Have  they  enticed  me  into  a 
trap  in  order  to  watch  me?  " 

He  had  grounds  for  such  a  suspicion,  for  such 
an  occurrence  had  already  happened  in  his  life. 

His  whole  existence  now  became  a  single  effort 
to  show  himself  so  ordinary  in  his  way  of  think- 
ing and  normal  in  his  behaviour,  that  nothing 
'  unusual  "  might  be  noticed  in  him.  He  did  not 
dare  to  give  vent  to  an  original  thought  or  to 
utter  a  parodox,  and  whenever  the  temptation 
came  to  narrate  something  of  his  wedding 
journey  he  pinched  his  knee. 

This  continual  fear  of  being  watched  depressed 
him  so  much  that  he  saw  watching  eyes  every- 
where, and  thought  he  noticed  traps  laid  for  him 
in  questions  where  there  were  none.  Sensitive 
as  he  was,  he  believed  that  the  whole  village 


164    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

exhaled  the  contagious  atmosphere  of  the  luna- 
tics ;  he  became  depressed  and  feared  to  go  mad 
himself.  But  he  did  not  attempt  to  go  away, 
partly  because  he  feared  being  arrested  at  the 
station,  and  partly  because  he  had  told  his  wife 
to  meet  him  at  this  village. 

He  had  received  letters  from  Arreskov,  in  which 
his  mother-in-law  informed  him  what  disquiet 
and  anxiety  his  disappearance  had  caused  them. 
His  father-in-law,  who  well  knew  what  he  would 
have  done  in  the  unfortunate  man's  place,  had 
immediately  foreboded  his  suicide  and  wept 
aloud.  They  had  searched  for  him  by  the  banks 
of  the  lake  and  in  the  wood.  .  .  .  He  stopped 
reading  the  letter  and  felt  his  conscience  prick 
him.  The  good  old  man  had  wept !  How  terrible 
his  lot  must  be,  when  the  sight  of  it  had  that 
effect  on  others !  The  letter  went  on  to  say  that 
Maria  had  arrived,  and  that  they  would  soon  meet 
again,  if  he  only  kept  quiet,  for  she  loved  him. 
This  was  a  ray  of  light  and  it  gave  him  strength  to 
endure  this  hell,  where  everyone  looked  askance 
at  his  neighbour  to  see  whether  he  were  in  his 
senses. 

But  the  two  last  days  brought  new  tortures. 
The  Swede  whom  he  had  met  in  the  Copenhagen 
cafe  had  accepted  an  invitation  to  come  to  dinner. 
The  Norwegian  went  gladly  to  the  station  to  meet 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    165 

his  best  friend,  who  understood  him  better  than 
anyone  else,  and  who,  though  poor  himself,  had 
tried  to  make  interest  for  him  with  rich  people, 
and  to  procure  the  help  for  him  which  he  himself 
could  not  obtain.  But  now  he  met  a  stranger  who 
looked  at  him  coldly  and  treated  him  as  a 
stranger.  There  was  no  smile  of  recognition  on 
his  part,  no  inquiry  after  the  Norwegian's  health 
and  especially  no  allusion  to  the  past. 

After  dinner  he  took  the  host  aside  and  asked  : 
'  Is  the  Swede  angry  with  me  ?  ' 

; '  Angry  ?  No  !  But  you  understand  he  has 
now  married  Lais." 

"Married?" 

'  Yes,  and  therefore  he  does  not  like  to  be 
reminded  that  she  was  your  friend." 

1 '  I  understand  that,  but  it  is  not  my  fault  that 
I  was  her  friend  before  she  knew  that  the  Swede 
was  in  existence." 

"No,  certainly  not;  but  you  have  gossiped 
about  her." 

' '  I  only  said  what  everyone  else  said,  since 
it  was  no  secret.  She  herself  so  boasted  of  her 
conquests  that  they  were  bound  to  become 
public." 

'  Yes,  but  the  fact  is  as  I  say." 

The  Swede  remained  in  the  hotel,  and  there- 
fore the  Norwegian  was  relegated  to  solitude. 


166    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

In  order  to  while  away  the  time  he  made  use  of 
the  flora  of  the  neighbourhood  in  order  to  study 
the  biology  of  plants.  For  this  purpose  he 
carried  about  with  him  on  his  walks  a  morphia 
syringe,  intending  to  see  whether  the  plants  were 
sensitive  to  this  nerve  poison.  He  wished  to 
prove  by  experiment  that  they  possess  a  sensi- 
tive nervous  system. 

One  afternoon  he  sat  drinking  a  glass  of  wine 
at  a  garden  restaurant  on  the  outskirts  of  the 
village.  Over  his  table  hung  the  branches  of  an 
apple-tree,  laden  with  small  red  apples.  These 
were  suitable  for  his  purpose.  Accordingly,  he 
stood  on  his  chair,  made  an  insertion  with  the 
morphia  syringe  in  the  twig  which  bore  the  apple, 
but  pressed  too  hard,  so  that  it  fell.  At  that 
instant  he  heard  a  cry  and  halloo  from  the  wooded 
slope  behind  him,  and  saw  an  angry  man,  followed 
by  his  wife  and  child,  come  rushing  towards 
him  with  uplifted  stick.  "  There !  I  have  him  at 
last !  "  he  cried. 

Him!  He  was  mistaken  for  an  apple  stealer 
for  whom  they  had  been  watching. 

The  Norwegian  summoned  all  his  Buddhistic 
philosophy  to  his  aid,  got  down  from  the  chair, 
and  sat  expecting  to  be  led  off  by  gendarmes  as 
he  had  been  caught  in  the  act.  It  was  impossible 
to  explain  his  conduct,  for  none  of  the  authorities 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    167 

could  approve  such  an  eccentric  act  as  the  inocu- 
lation of  an  apple-tree  with  morphia. 

Meanwhile  a  minute  passed  while  the  angry 
man  was  running  along  by  a  fence  and  entering 
the  enclosure.  Like  one  condemned  to  death, 
the  Norwegian  sat  there  awaiting  a  blow  from 
the  stick  as  an  earnest  of  what  was  to  follow.  He 
was  firmly  resolved  to  die  like  a  warrior,  and 
did  not  trouble  to  devise  useless  explanations, 
but  only  thought :  '  This  is  the  most  devilish 
experience  I  have  had  in  my  whole  terrible 
life." 

Sixty  seconds  are  a  long  time  but  they  pass 
at  last! 

Whether  it  was  the  Norwegian's  carefully 
groomed  exterior  and  expensive  suit,  the  wine 
and  the  best  kind  of  cigarettes,  or  something 
quite  different  which  had  a  mollifying  effect,  the 
angry  man,  who  had  certainly  not  had  such  a 
stylish  customer  before,  bared  his  head,  and 
only  asked  whether  the  gentleman  had  been 
attended  to.  The  Norwegian,  answering  politely, 
noticed  how  the  restaurant  keeper  stared  at  the 
morphia  syringe,  the  powder  box  and  the  glass 
of  water. 

With  the  free-and-easy  tone  of  a  man  of  the 
world,  the  Norwegian  explained  the  embarrass- 
ing situation:  "I  am  a  botanist,  and  was  just 


168    FAIR  HAVEN  AND  FOUL  STRAND 

about  to  make  an  experiment  when  you  surprised 
me  in  a  very  suspicious  position." 

"  Pray,  doctor,  do  as  though  you  were  in  your 
own  house,  and  be  quite  at  your  ease,"  was  the 
reply. 

After  exchanging  some  remarks  about  the 
weather,  the  restaurant  keeper  went  indoors ;  he 
muttered  something  to  the  waitress  which  the 
Norwegian  thought  he  overheard.  It  caused  him 
to  take  his  departure,  but  in  a  leisurely  way. 
"  He  thought  I  was  one  of  the  lunatics,"  he  said 
to  himself.  "  That  was  my  deliverance.  I  can't 
come  here  again,  however." 

Several  hours  passed,  but  the  impression  of  the 
sixty  seconds  of  humiliation  and  the  lifted  stick 
still  remained.  '  That  is  not  mischance;  that  is 
something  else,"  was  his  conclusion,  as  usual. 

The  next  morning  he  took  his  walk  and  medi- 
tated on  his  destiny.  '  Why  haven't  you  shot 
yourself?"  Let  him  say  who  can.  One  view 
was  that,  finally,  all  difficulties  are  disentangled 
and  experience  shows  that  the  end  is  good.  This 
used  to  be  called  "  hope,"  and  by  means  of  it  one 
warped  one's  ship  half  an  ell  farther,  as  with  a 
kedge  anchor.  Others  maintained  that  it  was 
curiosity  which  supported  people.  They  wanted 
to  see  the  sequel,  just  as  when  one  reads  a  novel, 
or  sees  a  play. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    169 

The  Norwegian,  for  his  part,  had  never  found 
an  aim  in  life.  Religion  certainly  said  that  one 
should  be  improved  here  below,  but  he  had  only 
seen  himself  forced  into  situations  from  which 
he  emerged  worse  than  before.  One  certainly 
became  a  little  more  tolerant  towards  one's 
brother-men,  but  this  tolerance  strongly  re- 
sembled moral  laxity.  Those  who  smile  indul- 
gently at  others'  crimes  are  not  far  from  being 
criminals  themselves.  When  in  conversation  it 
was  alleged  that  one  should  love  one's  fellowmen, 
he  used  to  deliver  himself  of  his  final  sentiment 
as  follows  :  "  I  neither  love  them  nor  hate  them ; 
I  put  up  with  them  as  they  put  up  with  me." 

The  fact  that  he  was  never  entirely  crushed  by 
a  sorrow  sprang  from  his  having  an  indistinct 
suspicion  that  life  had  no  complete  reality,  but 
was  a  dream  stage,  and  that  our  actions,  even 
the  worst  of  them,  were  carried  out  under  the 
influence  of  some  strong  suggestive  power  other 
than  ourselves.  He  therefore  felt  himself  to  a 
certain  extent  irresponsible.  He  did  not  deny 
his  badness,  but  knew  also  that  in  his  innermost 
being  there  was  an  upward,  striving  spirit  which 
suffered  from  the  humiliation  of  being  confined  in 
a  human  body.  It  was  this  inner  personality 
which  possessed  the  sensitive  conscience,  which 
could  sometimes,  to  his  alarm,  press  forward  and 


170    FAIR   HAVEN   AND   FOUL    STRAND 

become  sentimental,  weeping  over  his  or  her 
wretchedness — which  of  the  two,  it  was  hard  to 
say.  Then  his  second  self  laughed  at  the  foolish- 
ness of  the  first,  and  this  "  divine  frivolity,"  as 
he  called  it,  served  him  better  than  morbid 
brooding. 

When  he  came  home  from  his  work,  he  found 
his  door  shut.  Full  of  foreboding,  he  knocked 
and  uttered  his  own  name.  When  the  door 
opened,  his  young,  wild  wife  fell  on  his  neck. 
It  seemed  to  him  quite  natural  and  simple,  as 
though  he  had  left  her  two  minutes  before.  She 
spoke  not  a  word  of  reproach,  inquiry,  or 
explanation,  but  only  this :  ' '  Have  you  much 
money  or  little?  " 

"  Why  do  you  ask  that?  " 

' '  Because  I  have  much,  and  want  a  good 
dinner  in  Copenhagen." 

In  this  they  were  agreed,  and  such  was  their 
reunion.  And  why  not?  Two  months  of  tor- 
ture were  forgotten  and  obliterated  as  though 
they  had  never  been ;  the  disgrace  of  a  separation 
about  which  people  had  perhaps  already  gossiped, 
had  vanished. 

' '  If  anyone  asked  me, ' '  he  said,  ' '  about  what 
we  had  quarrelled  I  would  not  be  able  to 
remember." 

"  Nor  I,  either.    But,  therefore,  we  will  never, 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     171 

never  part  again.     We  must  not  separate  for  half 
a  day,  or  everything  goes  crazy." 

This  was  certainly  the  wisest  plan,  he  thought, 
and  so  did  she.  And  yet  one  recollection  came 
into  his  mind  of  Dover  and  another  of  London, 
when  they  were  not  apart  for  a  moment,  and  just 
for  that  very  reason  everything  went  quite  crazy. 
But  they  must  not  be  too  particular. 

'  And  how  is  the  old  father?  "  he  asked. 

"  Ah,  he  was  so  fond  of  you  that  I  became 
jealous." 

'  I  have  noticed  that.  How  did  he  receive 
you?" 

'  Well,  I  won't  talk  about  that.  But  it  was 
for  your  sake,  so  I  forgave  him."  Even  at  that 
she  could  smile,  as  indeed  she  could  at  every- 
thing. 

Well  then,  we  will  feast  to-day,  and  work 
to-morrow. 


VI 

The  autumn  brought  what  the  spring  had 
promised,  but  not  fulfilled.  They  lived  in  a  good 
boarding-house,  high  up  certainly,  but  with  a 
view  over  the  sea.  Each  of  them  kept  up  a 
slight  intercourse  with  former  friends  so  that  they 


172     FAIR  HAVEN  AND  FOTJL  STRAND 

were  not  always  tete-a-tete.  The  sun  shone, 
money  came  in,  and  life  was  easy.  This  lasted 
for  two  unforgettable  months  without  a  cloud. 
There  was  boundless  confidence  on  both  sides, 
without  a  trace  of  jealousy.  On  one  occasion, 
when  she  had  tried  mischievously  to  arouse  his, 
he  had  said  to  her  :  "  Don't  play  with  madness ! 
Be  sure  that  with  such  play  you  only  arouse  my 
abhorrence  and  my  hatred  at  the  same  time,  when 
you  introduce  into  my  mental  pictures  of  you 
the  image  of  another  man." 

But  she  herself  was  jealous,  even  of  his  male 
friends,  and  drove  Ilmarinen  away.  There 
were  ladies  at  the  table  d'hote,  and  each  time 
that  he  addressed  one  of  them,  she  became  so 
indisposed  that  she  had  to  get  up  and  go.  There 
was  no  occasion  to  mistrust  his  faithfulness  to 
her,  but  her  imperiousness  was  so  boundless,  that 
she  could  not  endure  his  imparting  his  thoughts 
to  another,  man  or  woman.  When  she  con- 
ducted some  business  transactions  for  him  with 
publishers  she  exceeded  her  authority  and  acted 
rather  as  his  guardian  than  as  his  helper.  He 
had  to  warn  her  :  ' '  Remember  what  I  said !  If 
you  misuse  the  power  I  have  given  you,  I  will 
overthrow  you  like  a  tyrant."  He  did  not  doubt 
her  goodwill  but  her  want  of  insight  and  exagge- 
rated ideas  of  his  capacities  caused  him  incon- 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STEAND     173 

venience,  and  even  loss  of  money.  When  he  took 
away  from  her  the  authority  to  act  for  him,  she 
behaved  like  a  naughty  child,  brought  every- 
thing into  confusion  and  threw  it  away  as  worth- 
less. Accordingly,  the  way  was  prepared  for  the 
inevitable  result. 

One  Sunday  morning  they  had  a  disagreement 
on  an  important  subject,  and  at  last  he  had  shut 
the  door  between  their  two  rooms.  Then  he  went 
out.  On  his  return,  he  found  a  letter  from  his 
wife  saying  she  had  gone  to  a  family  which  they 
knew  in  the  country,  and  would  be  back  in  the 
evening.  In  order  to  let  her  feel  what  solitude 
is  like  he  made  an  engagement  for  the  evening 
with  some  friends.  The  evening  came.  He 
went  out,  but  about  ten  o'clock,  thinking  it  cruel 
to  remain  longer,  he  returned  home.  When  he 
tried  to  open  his  door,  he  found  it  shut  from 
within. 

"  Aha!  "  he  thought.  "  This  is  her  plan  to 
make  me  listen  to  a  curtain-lecture  in  her  room.'* 
He  rang  for  the  servant.  '  Is  my  wife  at 
home?" 

'  No,  she  came  home  at  nine,  but  went  out 
again,  in  order  to  meet  you,  sir." 

"Very  well,  open  the  door  of  my  wife's 
room."  That  was  done,  but  the  door  of  his 
room  remained  locked,  as  he  had  locked  it  himself 


in  the  morning.  Then  he  made  his  decision, 
closed  the  outer  door  of  the  flat,  and  took  posses- 
sion of  his  wife's  room.  After  an  hour  she  came 
and  knocked.  Her  husband  answered  through 
the  closed  door :  c  c  You  can  take  my  room ;  I 
hope  you  can  open  it." 

When  she  found  she  could  not  she  began  to 
form  suspicions  and  thought  he  had  shut  him- 
self in  with  someone.  She  naturally  would  not 
endure  the  scandal  but  sent  for  the  police,  on 
the  pretext  that  a  thief  had  been  there,  and 
perhaps  was  still  in  the  room.  The  police  came; 
the  Norwegian  dressed  himself  and  admitted 
them,  and  they  broke  open  the  door  between  the 
two  rooms.  At  the  same  time  the  door  leading 
to  the  corridor  was  opened.  A  servantmaid  said 
she  thought  she  had  heard  steps  inside  the  room. 
Before  the  open  window  stood  a  chair  so  placed 
as  though  someone  had  stood  on  it  in  order  to 
climb  on  the  roof.  A  thief  then  (or  a  woman) 
had  clambered  on  the  roof.  The  police  went  on 
it  with  lanterns,  and  some  of  the  inmates  of  the 
boarding-house  followed.  A  shadow  moved  by 
a  chimney.  A  cry  rose  :  "  There  he  is !  '  The 
police  declared  that  they  could  not  climb  the 
steep  slate  roof,  and  advised  them  to  send  for  the 
fire  brigade.  '  But  that  costs  fifty  crowns," 
objected  the  Norwegian.  His  wife  signed  a 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     175 

requisition  for  it,  but  her  husband  tore  it  in  two. 
Meanwhile  a  crowd  had  collected  in  the  street; 
the  neighbouring  roofs  were  also  full  of  specta- 
tors. A  cry  was  raised  :  "  There  he  is  !  "  They 
had  seized  a  fellow  who  had  joined  the  searchers 
with  the  good  intention  of  catching  the  thief.  A 
maid  recollected  that  in  the  afternoon  a  traveller 
had  arrived  and  was  sleeping  in  a  neighbouring 
attic  from  which  he  could  have  easily  got 
into  the  room.  The  police  made  their  way  into 
the  attic,  searched  through  his  papers  and  found 
nothing.  All  the  attics  were  ransacked  without 
result,  and  at  midnight  the  police  departed. 

Then  the  young  wife  wished  to  begin  with  a 
whole  series  of  explanations,  but  her  husband 
was  tired  of  the  whole  nonsense  and  could 
explain  nothing.  Therefore,  since  nothing  more 
was  to  be  done,  he  carried  his  wife  into  her  room 
and  shut  the  door  between  them  for  the  second 
time  that  day ! 

This  demoniacal  adventure  was  never  cleared 
up.  The  Norwegian  did  not  believe  there  had 
been  a  thief,  for  nothing  was  missing  from  the 
rooms ;  he  thought  that  his  young  wife,  who  had 
seen  many  plays,  had  stuck  something  in  the  lock, 
and  that  then  devils  had  continued  the  perform- 
ance of  the  comedy.  He  did  not  try  to  elicit 
what  his  wife  thought,  for  then  he  would  have 


176    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

been  entangled  in  a  web  of  necessary  lies.  He 
therefore  made  a  stroke  of  erasure  through  the 
whole  affair.  The  next  morning  they  were  again 
good  friends,  but  not  quite  so  good  as  before. 

How  disunion  between  a  married  pair  arises 
has  not  yet  been  explained.  They  love  one 
another,  only  flourish  in  each  other's  society, 
have  not  different  opinions,  and  suffer  when  they 
are  separated;  their  whole  united  self-interest 
enjoins  them  to  keep  the  peace,  because  it  is  they 
especially  who  suffer  when  it  is  not  kept.  Never- 
theless, a  little  cloud  arises,  one  knows  not 
whence;  all  merits  are  transformed  into  faults, 
beauty  becomes  ugliness  and  they  confront  each 
other  like  two  hissing  snakes;  they  wish  each 
other  miles  away,  although  they  know  that  if 
they  are  separated  for  a  moment  there  begins 
the  pain  of  longing,  which  is  greater  than  any 
other  pain  in  life. 

Here  physiology  and  psychology  are  non- 
plussed. Swedenborg  in  his  "  Conjugal  Love  " 
is  the  only  one  who  has  even  approached  the 
solution  of  the  problem,  and  he  has  seen  that  for 
that  purpose  higher  factors  must  be  taken  into 
consideration  than  come  into  the  mental  pur- 
view of  most  people. 

This  is  why  a  married  pair  who  love  each  other 
are  obliged  again  and  again  to  wonder  why  they 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     177 

hate  one  another,  i.e.  why  they  flee  one  another 
although  they  seek  one  another.  Married  people 
who  are  slightly  acquainted  with  Ganot's 
"Physics"  may  note  the  resemblance  of  this 
phenomenon  to  that  of  the  electricised  elder-pith 
balls,  but  this  will  not  make  them  either  wiser  or 
happier.  Love  indeed  presents  all  the  symptoms 
of  lunacy,  hallucination,  or  seeing  beauty  where 
none  exists;  profoundest  melancholy,  varying 
with  extreme  hilarity  without  any  transition 
stage;  unreasonable  hate;  distortions  of  each 
other's  real  opinions  (so-called  "  misunderstand- 
ings"); persecution  mania,  when  one  believes 
the  other  is  setting  spies  and  laying  snares ;  some- 
times indeed  attempts  on  each  other's  life,  especi- 
ally with  poison.  All  this  has  reasons  which  lie 
below  the  surface.  The  question  arises,  whether 
through  a  married  pair's  living  together,  the  evil 
thoughts  of  one,  while  still  unripened,  are  not 
quite  clearly  apprehended  and  interpreted  by  the 
other,  as  though  they  had  already  entered  into 
consciousness,  with  the  express  purpose  of  being 
carried  into  action.  Nothing  annoys  a  man  more 
than  to  have  his  secret  thoughts  read,  and  that 
only  a  married  pair  can  do  to  each  other.  They 
cannot  conceal  their  dark  secrets;  one  antici- 
pates the  other's  intentions,  and  therefore  they 
easily  form  the  idea  that  they  spy  on  each  other, 

M 


178    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

as  indeed  they  actually  do.  Therefore  they  fear 
no  one's  look  so  much  as  each  other's,  and  are 
so  defenceless  against  one  another.  Each  is 
accompanied  by  a  judge  who  condemns  the  evil 
desire  while  yet  in  the  germ,  although  no  one  is 
answerable  for  his  thoughts  to  the  civic  law. 

Accordingly,  in  marrying,  one  enters  into  a 
relation  which  stands  a  grade  higher  than 
ordinary  life,  makes  severer  demands,  more 
exacting  claims,  and  operates  with  more  finely 
developed  spiritual  resources.  Therefore  the 
Christian  Church  made  marriage  a  sacrament, 
and  regarded  it  rather  as  a  purgatory  than  a 
pleasure.  Swedenborg  in  his  explanation  of  it, 
also  inclines  this  way. 

A  married  pair  are  ostensibly  one,  but  cannot 
be  really  so.  As  a  punishment  they  are  con- 
demned to  feel  thorns  when  they  wish  to  gather 
roses.  According  to  the  proverb:  "  Omnia 
vincit  amor  "  the  power  of  love  is  so  boundless, 
that  if  it  were  allowed  uncontrolled  sway,  the 
order  of  the  universe  would  be  endangered.  It 
is  a  crime  to  be  happy,  and  therefore  happiness 
must  be  chastised. 

Our  frivolous  friends  must  have  felt  something 
of  this,  for  when  they  had  had  a  tiff,  they  recon- 
ciled themselves  without  explanations  and  without 
alleging  reasons,  as  though  it  was  not  they  who 


FAIR    HAVEN    ATO    FOUL    STRATH)     179 

were  to  blame  for  the  discord  but  a  third  unknown 
person  who  had  brought  about  all  the  confusion. 

They  did  so  on  this  occasion  also,  but  the  peace 
did  not  last  long.  Some  days  afterwards  an 
indisputable  fact  was  apparent,  which  in  ordinary 
marriages  is  accepted  with  mixed  feelings,  but  in 
this  one  met  with  decided  disapproval.  The  wife 
was  beside  herself :  "  Now  you  have  ruined  my 
career ;  I  shall  sink  down  to  the  level  of  a  nurse 
and  how  shall  we  support  ourselves  ? ' ' 

There  awoke  in  her  a  personal  grudge  against 
her  husband  which  degenerated  into  hatred. 
She  was  an  example  of  the  "  independent  ' 
woman  who  protests  against  the  supposed  in- 
justice of  Nature  in  assigning  all  the  discomfort 
to  her.  She  forgets  that  this  brief  period  of  pain 
is  followed  by  an  extreme  and  long-lasting  joy 
which  is  quite  unknown  to  men. 

Here  reasonable  considerations  were  naturally 
of  no  avail,  and  when  there  were  no  more  smiles, 
the  situation  became  serious.  The  scenes  be- 
tween them  assumed  a  tragic  character,  and 
just  at  this  crisis  an  action  was  brought  against 
him  for  his  last-published  book,  which  was  con- 
fiscated at  the  same  time.  Autumn  passed,  and 
one  felt  that  the  sun  had  gone.  The  cheerful 
top-floor  room  changed  into  a  never-tidied  sick- 
room— became  narrow. 


180    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

Her  hatred  increased  continually;  she  could 
not  go  into  society,  nor  to  theatres,  and  hardly 
on  the  street.  What  most  annoyed  her  was  the 
fact  that  the  doctor  who  had  been  summoned  to 
declare  that  she  had  a  dangerous  disease,  hitherto 
unknown,  only  smiled,  saying  that  all  the  symp- 
toms were  normal,  and  ordered  soda-water. 
Instead  of  an  intelligent  friend,  the  Norwegian 
found  a  malicious,  spoilt,  unreasonable  child  at 
his  side,  and  longed  to  be  out  of  all  this  wretched- 
ness. All  conversation  ceased,  and  they  only 
carried  on  communications  by  writing.  But  there 
is  a  kind  of  malice  bordering  on  the  disgraceful 
and  infamous,  which  is  hard  to  define  but  easy  to 
recognise.  That  is  the  original  sin  in  human 
nature,  the  positive  wish  to  injure  without  cause, 
and  without  being  justified  in  taking  vengeance 
or  exacting  retribution.  This  kind  of  malice  is 
hardly  forgivable. 

One  day  he  received  a  scrap  of  paper  on  which 
something  was  written  which  prevented  him 
going  to  her  room  again.  Then  came  her  ulti- 
matum; she  resolved  to  go  to  her  relations  the 
next  day. 

"  I  wish  you  a  happy  journey,"  he  answered. 
In  the  dusk  of  the  early  morning  a  white  form 
stood  by  his  bedside  stretching  out  its  arms 
pleadingly  for  forgiveness.  He  did  not  move  but 


FAIE    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    181 

let  it  stand  there.  Then  she  fell  to  the  ground, 
and  he  let  her  lie,  like  an  overthrown  statue. 

Whence  the  soft-hearted  man,  who  was  always 
ready  to  forgive,  derived  this  firmness,  this 
inhuman  hardness,  he  could  not  understand,  but 
it  seemed  to  him  to  be  imposed  on  him  from  with- 
out like  a  duty,  or  a  fiery  ordeal  which  he  must 
go  through.  He  went  to  sleep  again.  Then  he 
awoke  and  dressed.  He  entered  the  empty  room 
and  was  conscious  of  the  void.  Everything  was 
irrevocably  at  an  end ! 

A  severe  agitation  was  needed  to  bring  his  ego 
uppermost,  and  he  resolved  to  drain  a  draught 
which  was  unsurpassed  for  bitterness.  He  went 
back  to  his  native  land,  from  which  he  had  been 
banished. 

When  he  got  on  the  steamer  for  Christiania, 
he  wrote  a  farewell  letter  to  the  captain,  went  on 
deck  with  his  revolver,  and  thought  of  finding  his 
grave  in  the  Kattegat.  Why  did  he  not  carry  out 
this  intention  ?  Let  him  say  who  can !  At  last 
he  found  himself  in  a  smaU  provincial  hotel. 
But  why  had  it  to  be  precisely  the  one  in  which 
Lais' s  friends  and  relations  lived  and  dominated 
the  social  circle  in  which  he  must  move?  He 
could  only  regard  that  as  a  mean  stroke  on  the 
part  of  Destiny,  for  on  this  occasion  he  was  not 
to  blame  at  all. 


182    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

Meanwhile  he  sat  as  on  an  ant-heap  in  an  alien 
and  hostile  environment.  For  three  days  long 
he  asked  himself :  ' '  What  have  I  got  to  do 
here  ?  ' '  And  he  answered  :  ' '  What  indeed  have 
you  to  do  anywhere?  '  So  he  remained.  For 
three  days  he  asked  himself  :  ' '  What  have  you  to 
do  in  life?  "  and  questioned  of  the  where,  whence 
and  whither.  As  an  answer,  the  revolver  lay  on 
the  table. 

Hamburg,  London,  and  Riigen  began  to  shine 
like  pleasant  memories  in  comparison  with  this 
place  of  exile.  It  was  so  dreadful  that  he  was 
astonished  at  the  inventiveness  of  Destiny 
in  devising  new  tortures  which  ever  increased  in 
severity.  His  room  in  the  hotel  was  a  suicide's 
room,  i.e.  a  combination  of  discomfort  and  un- 
canniness.  He  was  again  haunted  by  the  old 
idea  he  used  to  have  :  "  I  shall  not  get  alive  out 
of  this  room;  here  I  must  end  my  days."  His 
capacity  for  hoping  was  exhausted.  He  seemed 
to  be  dropping  downwards  towards  the  empty 
void  which  began  to  close  round  him  like  the 
last  darkness. 

On  the  fourth  day  he  received  a  letter  from 
his  sister-in-law  in  which  she  told  him  that  his 
little  wife  was  going  on  well.  At  the  same  time 
she  proposed  that  he  and  his  wife  should  spend 
the  winter  in  a  little  town  in  Alster,  so  that  her 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    183 

relations  could  now  and  then  visit  his  wife 
who,  in  her  present  condition,  needed  help  and 
advice. 

It  was,  then,  not  at  an  end !  And  these  pains 
of  death  had  been  endured  in  vain;  he  had  not 
needed  them  in  order  to  be  taught  to  miss  his 
wife.  It  was  not  over  yet,  and  he  began  to  live 
again. 

As  a  proof  that  he  had  completely  come  to 
the  end  of  himself  it  may  be  mentioned  that  the 
papers  in  those  days  contained  a  notice  of  his 
death.  He  wrote  to  contradict  this  in  a  vein  of 
gloomy  irony.  He  was  tormented  for  three  days 
more  by  having  to  run  about  to  collect  the 
journey  money. 

When  the  train  at  last  stopped  at  the  little 
station,  he  saw  first  of  all  his  wife's  pale  face. 
It  looked  certainly  somewhat  exhausted  by 
suffering,  but  beamed  at  the  same  time  with 
some  of  that  glorifying  radiance  which  mother- 
hood bestows.  When  her  eyes  discovered  him, 
her  face  lit  up. 

"She  loves  me,"  he  said  to  himself.  And 
he  began  to  live  again  literally  not  figuratively. 

:c  Are  you  well?"  he  asked  almost  shyly. 
'Yes  I  am,"  she  whispered,  burying  like  a 
child  her  face  in  his  great  cloak  and  kissing  the 
edge  of  it. 


184    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

"  What  are  you  doing?  What  are  you 
doing?  " 

And  she  hid  her  face  in  his  mantle  in  order 
not  to  show  the  emotion,  of  which  she  was 
always  ashamed. 

They  had  engaged  two  very  inferior  rooms; 
one  was  dark  and  the  other  uncomfortable, 
looking  out  on  a  factory.  His  wife  worked  in 
the  kitchen  and  resigned  herself  to  her  fate,  for 
her  maternal  feelings  were  aroused,  though  not 
yet  completely.  He  suffered  when  he  saw  her 
toiling  the  whole  day  at  the  kitchen-range  and 
in  the  scullery,  and  sometimes  felt  a  twinge  of 
conscience. 

When  he  wished  to  help  her  to  carry  some- 
thing heavy,  she  refused  to  be  helped,  for  she 
insisted  strongly  that  he  should  not  be  seen 
engaged  in  any  feminine  occupation,  nor  would 
she  allow  him  to  wait  on  her  or  to  do  her  any 
small  service.  All  storms  were  over  now;  a 
quiet  stillness  prevailed;  the  days  passed  one 
after  the  other  in  unvaried  monotony.  They 
lived  alone  together  and  had  no  social  inter- 
course nor  distractions. 

But  poverty  came.  The  trial  about  his  book 
had  frightened  the  publishers  and  theatres.  But 
the  worst  of  all  was  that  he  could  not  write. 

And  what  he  could  write,  he  did  not  wish  to, 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    185 

for  the  plot  of  the  story  affected  a  family  to 
whom  he  owed  a  debt  of  gratitude.  Now  when 
he  would  soon  have  two  families  to  provide 
for,  he  trembled  before  the  future  with  its 
increased  duties,  for  a  growing  dislike  to  exer- 
cise his  calling  as  an  author  had  finally  cul- 
minated in  disgust. 

What  an  occupation — to  flay  his  fellow- 
creatures  and  offer  their  skins  for  sale.  Like  a 
hunter  who,  when  pressed  hard  by  hunger,  cuts 
off  his  dog's  tail,  eats  the  flesh,  and  gives  the 
bone — its  own  bone — to  the  dog.  What  an 
occupation  to  spy  out  people's  secrets,  expose 
the  birth-marks  of  his  best  friend,  dissect  his 
wife  like  a  rabbit  for  vivisection,  and  act  like  a 
Croat,  cutting  down,  violating,  burning,  and 
selling.  Fie ! 

In  despair  he  sat  down  and  wrote  from  his 
notes  a  survey  of  the  most  important  epochs  of 
the  world's  history.  He  hoped,  or  in  his  need 
imagined  that  he  might  in  this  way  strike  out 
a  new  path  for  himself  as  an  historian,  which 
had  been  the  dream  of  his  youth,  before  he 
became  an  author. 

His  wife  knew  what  he  was  writing  and  that 
it  would  bring  in  no  money,  but  controlled  her- 
self; perhaps  his  ardent  conviction  had  per- 
suaded her  that  there  was  something  in  it.  She 


186    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

did  not  complain,  but  on  the  contrary  cheered 
him  up  and  offered  to  translate  the  work  into 
English. 

A  month  passed,  quiet,  peaceful  but  melan- 
choly. They  felt  that  they  were  not  enough  for 
each  other  in  this  absolute  loneliness.  They 
lamented  it  but  sought  for  no  society.  He,  with 
wider  experience  than  hers,  hoped  that  the  child 
on  its  arrival  would  be  satisfying  company  for 
them  both. 

Meanwhile  poverty  approached  nearer.  None 
of  his  plays  were  performed  or  sold,  and  not  one 
of  the  hopes  of  spring  had  been  realised.  His 
children  by  his  first  marriage  clamoured  for 
money,  and  food  began  to  be  scarce  in  the  house. 
Then  came  deliverance  in  the  form  of  an  in- 
vitation to  spend  the  winter  with  his  wife's 
grandparents. 

One  evening  in  December  they  alighted  at  a 
little  station  in  Jutland,  and  drove  through 
woods  and  wild  heath.  Everything  was  new  and 
strange.  In  this  house  he  was  now  to  live  as  a 
grandchild,  just  as  during  the  past  summer  in 
her  father's  house  he  had  been  for  eight  days 
a  child. 

They  reached  the  ferry  in  the  twilight.  The 
drifting  of  the  ice  had  begun,  but  the  water  had 
also  sunk  so  low  that  a  sand-bank  lay  in  the 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOTJL    STRAND    187 

middle  of  the  stream,  and  there  a  new  boat 
waited  for  them.  From  thence  a  large,  white, 
three-storied  house  was  visible;  it  looked 
unfriendly,  almost  weird,  with  its  projecting 
wings  and  high,  illuminated  windows. 

They  reached  the  land  and  found  themselves 
immediately  in  the  ghostly  castle.  They  were 
conducted  up  whitewashed  stairs  over  which 
hung  dark  oil-paintings  in  black  frames.  Then 
he  found  himself  in  a  warm,  well-lighted  room, 
among  her  relatives,  of  whom  he  only  knew  his 
mother-in-law. 

With  his  incredible  pliability,  he  immediately 
adapted  himself  to  his  position,  and  behaved 
like  the  young  relation  who  under  all  circum- 
stances must  show  reverence  to  his  elders. 

Here  in  the  house  his  right  of  self-determin- 
ation ceased;  he  must  conform  to  other  people's 
views,  wills,  and  habits.  In  order  to  spare  him- 
self unpleasantness,  he  had  resolved  beforehand 
to  have  no  more  likes  and  dislikes  of  his  own, 
but  to  accept  all  that  was  offered  to  him,  however 
strange  or  repulsive  it  might  appear. 

The  old  grandfather  was  a  notary  and 
barrister  who  had  retired  with  considerable 
wealth,  and  only  managed  his  estate  as  far  as 
was  necessary  for  domestic  purposes  and  for  his 
own  amusement.  Most  of  his  property  con- 


sisted  of  hunting-ground  and  was  in  that  state  of 
neglect  which  a  townsman  finds  picturesque.  He 
and  his  wife  were  both  over  seventy,  and  seemed 
only  to  be  waiting  for  their  end  with  the  cheerful 
resignation  of  good-natured,  orthodox  Catholics 
who  are  free  from  care.  They  had  already  built 
for  themselves  a  mausoleum  in  the  garden  where 
their  bodies  were  to  repose,  and  they  were 
accustomed  to  show  it  as  other  people  show  a 
summer-house.  It  was  a  little  whitewashed 
chapel,  with  flowers  planted  round  it,  which 
they  used  to  tend  as  though  they  already  stood 
there  in  memory  of  them. 

In  the  house  there  was  a  superfluity  of  good 
things.  After  having  been  half-starved  in  Alster 
here  they  found  it  difficult  to  avoid  gluttony, 
without  vexing  their  host.  Pheasants,  hare, 
venison  were  regular  standing  dishes  which  at 
last  became  a  weariness.  "  This  is  our  punish- 
ment," he  said,  "  because  we  complained  of  the 
manna;  now  we  are  stuffed  with  quails  like  the 
murmuring  Israelites  so  that  it  comes  out  at  our 
throats." 

A  stillness  like  that  of  old  age  supervened; 
there  was  no  need  of  care  or  anxiety  in  this 
house  where  there  were  as  many  servants  as 
members  of  the  family.  It  was  easy  to  live  with 
the  old  people,  who  had  outgrown  special  inter- 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     189 

ests,  views  and  passions,  and  the  young  pair, 
who  had  their  own  rooms  apart,  only  needed  to 
appear  at  meal-times. 

The  young  wife  was  now  altogether  a  mother, 
talked  of  and  with  the  unborn  child  as  though 
she  knew  it  well;  she  was  mild  and  womanly, 
humble  and  even  thankful  towards  her  husband, 
whose  affections  remained  unaltered  though  her 
shape  was  disfigured  and  her  beauty  faded. 

"  How  beautiful  life  is!  "  she  said. 

' '  Yes  it  is ;  but  how  long  will  it  last  ?  ' 

"Hush!" 

' '  I  will  be  silent !  But  you  know  that  happi- 
ness is  punished." 

No  one  asked  what  he  was  working  at ;  on  the 
contrary  all  that  he  heard  was :  '  You  should 
do  nothing  but  take  a  thorough  rest  after  your 
wild  rushing  about." 

Accordingly  he  sent  for  some  books  which 
had  been  given  him  some  years  previously  by  a 
rich  man  and  which  he  had  been  obliged  to  send 
back  home.  Then  he  began  a  series  of  syste- 
matic investigations,  studied  and  made  notes. 
He  felt  a  new  life  and  fresh  interests  awaken; 
and  when  he  now  found  his  former  hypothesis 
and  calculations  verified  by  synthesis  and 
analysis  he  became  certain  that  he  was  working 
by  a  sure  method,  and  in  the  right  way.  This 


190    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STBAND 

gave  him  such  confidence  that  he  felt  justified 
in  pursuing  his  investigations,  but  because  he 
could  not  explain  their  significance  to  the 
uninitiated,  his  position  became  somewhat  in- 
secure. People  had  to  take  him  on  good  faith; 
they  did  that  so  long  as  peace  prevailed,  but  at 
the  first  sign  of  antipathy  he  would  be  helplessly 
exposed  to  the  ridicule  or  contemptuous  pity  of 
the  bystanders. 

The  grandfather  was  a  cultivated  man,  and 
therefore  curious  to  know  what  was  going  on  in 
the  young  pair's  rooms.  When  he  inquired,  he 
received  evasive  answers,  but  since  he  had  been 
a  magistrate  and  barrister,  he  required  definite- 
ness.  When  he  heard  what  the  Norwegian's 
investigations  were  concerned  with,  he  confuted 
them  with  the  authority  of  the  text  books.  In 
order  to  put  an  end  to  fruitless  strife,  his  young 
relative  let  him  believe  he  was  right.  But  the 
old  man  tried  to  provoke  him  into  contradiction, 
assumed  a  superior  air  and  became  intrusive. 
He  was  allowed  to  be  so  for  the  present. 

"Nothing  for  nothing!"  thought  the  Nor- 
wegian. His  wife  thanked  him  for  his  yielding- 
ness  and  admired  his  self-control.  But  discord 
was  fated  to  come,  and  it  came. 

The  lawsuit  in  Copenhagen  about  his  book 
extended  its  operations  here  also,  and  one  day 


FAIK    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     191 

a  court  officer  came  to  summon  him  to  appear  as 
defendant  in  the  court  of  the  nearest  town. 
Since  he  had  from  the  beginning  challenged  the 
jurisdiction  of  the  Copenhagen  court,  because  as 
a  Norwegian  writer  he  was  not  responsible  to  a 
Danish  court,  on  account  of  a  translation;  and 
since  he  regarded  the  whole  proceedings  as 
illegal,  which  indeed  they  were,  he  refused  to 
appear.  The  old  man  on  the  other  hand  in- 
sisted that  he  should  do  so,  especially,  perhaps, 
because  he  did  not  like  to  see  gendarmes  coming 
to  his  house. 

To  put  an  end  to  the  matter,  the  Norwegian 
really  resolved  one  morning  to  go  and  present 
his  challenge  personally  in  court. 

He  therefore  went  at  eight  o'clock  and 
followed  the  beautiful  walk  along  the  river. 
But  about  half-way  he  met  the  postman  and 
received,  by  paying  cash  on  its  delivery,  a 
long-expected  book.  This  book  was  extremely 
expensive,  and  since  he  had  no  money,  he  had 
been  obliged  to  devise  a  plan  in  order  to  secure 
it.  After  thinking  about  it  for  a  month,  he 
remembered  that  he  had  some  valuables  stowed 
away  in  a  box  in  an  attic  in  Norway.  He  there- 
fore wrote  to  a  friend  and  asked  him  to  sell  the 
things  for  a  price  equivalent  to  the  purchase  of 
the  expensive  book,  to  change  the  money  into 


192    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

notes  and  to  send  them  in  an  unregistered  letter 
so  that  no  one  might  know  of  it.  He  did  this 
because  he  felt  he  was  stealing  from  his  wife 
and  family,  but  it  had  to  be  done,  as  he  wished 
to  solve  an  important  problem.  As  he  now  held 
the  long-desired  means  for  doing  so  in  his  hand, 
he  felt  a  lightning  flash  in  his  soul,  and  turned 
home  without  thinking. 

:<  Now,  I  will  finish  the  business,"  he  said  to 
himself;  "  the  gendarmes  can  come  afterwards." 

As  he  entered  the  courtyard  the  old  man  stood 
there,  cutting  up  a  deer  which  he  had  shot.  The 
Norwegian  sought  to  slip  past  him  unperceived, 
but  did  not  succeed. 

"Have  you  already  been  to  the  judge?'3 
asked  the  old  man  sceptically. 

''No,"  answered  the  Norwegian  curtly,  and 
hurried  through  the  house-door.  He  ran  up  the 
stairs  to  his  room  and  bolted  the  door.  Then  he 
sat  down  to  study.  After  half  an  hour  he  said  to 
himself:  "Is  the  greatest  problem  of  modern 
times  solved?  '  There  was  a  knock  at  the  door, 
and  then  another  hard  and  decided.  He  was 
obliged  to  open  it  in  order  to  get  quiet. 

"  Why  don't  you  go  to  the  judge?  "  asked 
the  old  man. 

"That's  nothing  to  do  with  you,"  he  answered 
and  slammed  the  door  to  with  a  sound  like  a  shot, 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     193 

But  now  there  was  no  more  peace  for  him !  He 
felt  that  a  crisis  had  come  in  his  destiny,  and  he 
heard  voices  below.  His  hand  trembled,  he  felt 
as  though  paralysed  and  closed  the  book  which 
contained  what  he  sought.  At  the  same  mo- 
ment he  lost  confidence  and  dared  not  face 
what  seemed  a  contradictory  proof  of  his 
theory. 

After  some  minutes  his  mother-in-law  came. 
She  was  not  angry,  but  found  it  unpleasant  to 
have  to  tell  him  that  he  and  his  wife  must  leave 
the  house  at  once,  before  dinner.  They  could 
have  her  little  one-storied  cottage  at  the  bottom 
of  the  garden  and  have  their  meals  sent  from  the 
house.  His  little  wife  appeared  and  danced  with 
joy  at  the  thought  that  they  would  have  a  little 
house  of  their  own,  especially  with  a  garden  and 
park  round  it. 

The  change  took  place,  and  now  in  this  cottage 
began  the  two  happiest  months  in  the  life  of  the 
married  pair.  Their  cottage  of  grey  stone,  with 
little  iron-barred  windows  framed  in  sandstone, 
was  quite  idyllic.  It  was  built  in  convent  style 
and  covered  with  vine-creepers.  The  walls  of 
the  rooms  were  painted  white,  without  any 
hangings,  and  the  low  ceilings  were  supported 
by  thick  beams  black  with  age. 

He  had  a  little  room  constructed  like  a  real 

V 


194    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

monk's  cell,  narrow  and  long  with  a  single  small 
window  at  the  end.  The  walls  were  so  thick  that 
flower-pots  could  stand  outside  in  front  of  the 
window,  as  well  as  inside  on  the  window-ledge. 
The  furniture  was  old-fashioned  and  suited  its 
surroundings.  Here  he  arranged  his  library, 
and  never  had  he  felt  so  comfortable  before. 

But  now  they  had  to  prepare  for  the  coming 
of  the  child.  Husband  and  wife  painted  the 
window-sills  and  doors.  Roses  and  clematis 
were  planted  before  the  cottage.  The  garden 
was  dug  up  and  sown.  In  order  to  fill  up  the 
blank  spaces  of  the  great  white  walls,  he  painted 
pictures  on  them.  When  all  was  ready  they  sat 
down  and  admired  the  work  of  their  hands. 
"It  is  splendid,"  they  said;  "  and  now  we  can 
receive  the  child.  Think  how  pleased  it  will  be, 
to  see  so  many  pictures  the  first  day !  ' 

They  waited  and  hoped;  during  the  long 
spring  evenings  they  only  talked  of  him  or  her, 
guessed  which  it  would  be,  discussed  what  name 
it  should  have,  and  speculated  on  its  future. 
His  wife's  thoughts  for  the  most  part  were 
occupied  in  wondering  whether  it  would  be  fair 
and  resemble  his  boy,  whom  she  loved.  She 
and  her  family  were  especially  fond  of  fair 
people,  whether  because  they  resembled  light, 
while  the  dusky-complexioned  reminded  one 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOTJL    STRAND     195 

of  darkness,  would  be  difficult  to  say.  They 
believed  everything  good  of  fair  people  and 
spoke  ill  of  the  Jews,  although  the  little  wife's 
grandmother  on  the  paternal  side  was  a  Jewess ; 
among  her  maternal  relations  who  sprang  from 
Schleswig-Holstein  peasantry  the  word  ' '  Jew  ' 
was  used  as  a  term  of  reproach.  The  Norwe- 
gian's father-in-law  was  an  anti-Semite  but  when 
he  joked  at  the  paradox  involved  in  this,  his  wife 
said  :  "  You  must  not  joke  at  it;  we  will  do  that 
ourselves." 

At  last  one  day  in  May  as  the  sun  rose,  the 
coming  of  the  unknown  traveller  was  heralded, 
and  after  twelve  terrible  hours  it  proved  to  be  a 
girl  who  at  any  rate  was  not  dark-haired. 

This  ought  to  have  completed  the  idyll,  but  it 
seemed,  on  the  contrary,  to  put  an  end  to  it. 
The  little  one  did  not  seem  to  thrive  in  this 
vale  of  tears,  but  cried  day  and  night.  Nurses 
were  engaged  and  nurses  were  dismissed.  Five 
women  filled  the  house  and  each  had  different 
views  as  to  the  rearing  of  the  child.  The  father 
went  about  like  a  criminal  and  was  always  in  the 
way.  His  wife  thought  that  he  did  not  love  the 
child  and  this  vexed  her  so  much  as  to  make 
her  suffer.  At  the  same  time  she  herself  was 
completely  transformed  into  a  mother  to  the 
exclusion  of  everything  else.  She  had  the  child 


196    FAIK   HAVEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

in  her  own  bed,  and  could  spend  the  greater  part 
of  the  night  sitting  on  a  chair  absorbed  in  con- 
templation of  its  beauty  as  it  slept.  Her  husband 
had  also  to  come  sometimes  and  join  in  her 
admiration,  but  he  thought  the  mother  most 
beautiful  in  those  moments  when  she  forgot 
herself  and  gazed  ecstatically  at  her  child  with  a 
happy  smile. 

But  a  storm  approached  from  without.  The 
people  of  the  neighbourhood  were  superstitious, 
and  the  child's  continual  crying  had  given  rise  to 
gossip.  They  began  to  ask  whether  it  had  been 
baptised. 

According  to  law  the  child  should  be  baptised 
in  the  father's  religion,  but  since  both  he  and  the 
mother  were  indifferent  in  the  matter,  the  bap- 
tism was  postponed  as  something  of  no  impor- 
tance, especially  as  there  was  no  Catholic  priest 
in  the  neighbourhood. 

The  child's  crying  was  really  not  normal,  and 
as  the  popular  opinion  of  the  neighbourhood 
began  to  find  expression,  the  grandmother  came 
and  asked  them  to  have  it  baptised.  "  People 
are  murmuring,"  she  said;  "and  they  have 
already  threatened  to  stone  your  cottage." 

The  young  unbelievers  did  not  credit  this,  but 
smiled.  The  murmurings,  however,  increased; 
it  was  alleged  that  a  peasant  woman  had  seen  the 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    19T 

devil  in  the  garden,  and  that  the  foreign  gentle- 
man was  an  atheist.  There  was  some  founda- 
tion for  this  report,  for  people  who  met  the  two 
heretics  on  the  roads  turned  away.  At 
last  there  came  an  ultimatum  from  the  old  man. 
"  The  child  must  receive  Catholic  baptism 
within  twenty-four  hours  or  the  family  will  be 
deported  across  the  Belt." 

The  Norwegian  answered  :  ' '  We  Protestants 
are  very  tolerant  in  our  belief,  but  if  it  is  made 
a  financial  matter,  we  can  be  as  fanatical  as  some 
Catholics."  The  position  was  serious,  for  the 
young  pair  had  not  a  penny  for  travelling 
expenses.  His  letter  was  answered  with  a  simple 
"  Then  go!  " 

The  Norwegian  replied  :  "  To  be  a  martyr  for 
a  faith  which  one  does  not  possess  is  somewhat 
fantastic,  and  I  did  not  expect  that  we  should 
play  the  Thirty  Years  War  over  again  down 
here.  But  look  out!  The  Norwegian  will  come 
and  take  his  daughter  off  with  his  baggage,  for 
he  is  a  Norwegian  subject." 

The  grandees  in  the  large  house  began  to  take 
a  milder  tone,  but  consulted  and  devised  a 
stratagem.  The  child  was  announced  to  be  ill 
and  became  worse  every  day.  At  last  the  grand- 
mother came  with  her  retinue  and  told  the  father 
that  the  child  could  live  no  longer,  but  he  did  not 


198    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STKAND 

believe  it.  On  his  return  from  a  long  walk  in 
the  woods  the  same  day  he  was  met  by  his  wife 
with  the  news  that  the  child  had  received  dis- 
cretionary baptism  at  the  hands  of  the  midwife 
in  the  presence  of  the  doctor. 

'  Into  which  faith  has  the  child  been  bap- 
tised ?  ' '  asked  the  father. 

'The  Protestant,  of  course." 

"  But  I  don't  see  how  a  Catholic  midwife  can 
give  Protestant  baptism."  But  as  he  saw  that 
his  wife  was  privy  to  the  plot,  he  said  no  more. 
The  next  day  the  child  was  well,  and  there 
was  no  more  talk  of  expelling  the  family.  The 
grandees  had  conquered.  Jesuits  ! 

The  child,  which  had  been  expected  to  unite 
the  pair  more  closely  to  each  other,  seemed 
to  have  come  to  separate  them.  The  mother 
thought  the  father  cold  towards  the  little  one. 
"You  don't  love  your  child,"  she  said. 

'Yes  I  do,  but  as  a  father,"  he  replied. 
"You  should  love  her  as  a  mother.  That  is 
the  difference." 

The  fact  was  that  he  feared  to  attach  himself 
too  closely  to  the  newly  born,  for  he  felt  that  a 
separation  from  the  mother  was  in  the  air,  and 
to  be  tied  to  her  by  means  of  the  child  he  felt  to 
be  a  fetter. 

She  on  her  side  did  not  know  exactly  how  she 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND     199 

wished  to  have  it.  If  he  loved  the  child,  it  might 
happen  that  he  would  take  it  from  her  when  he 
went  away ;  if  he  did  not  love  it,  he  would  simply 
go  by  himself.  For  that  he  would  go  she 
felt  sure.  He  had  had  a  dramatic  success  at 
Paris  in  the  spring,  and  another  play  of  his 
was  announced  for  the  autumn.  He  therefore 
wished  to  go  there,  and  so  did  she,  but  the  child 
hindered  her  movements,  and  if  he  went  alone 
to  Paris,  she  felt  she  would  never  see  him  again. 
Many  letters  with  French  postmarks  came  for 
him  now,  and  these  roused  her  curiosity,  for  he 
burnt  them  at  once.  This  last  circumstance, 
which  was  quite  contrary  to  his  habit,  aroused 
her  suspicion  and  hatred. 

*  You  are  preparing  for  a  journey?  "  she  said 
one  evening. 

"  Yes,  naturally,"  he  answered.  "I  cannot 
live  in  this  uncertainty;  I  might  be  put  out  on 
the  high  road  at  any  time." 

"  You  think  of  deserting  us?  " 
'  I  must  leave  you  in  order  to  do  my  busi- 
ness in  Paris.    A  business  journey  is  not  deser- 
tion." 

"Yes,  then  you  can  go,"  she  said,  betraying 
herself. 

"  I  shall  go  as  soon  as  I  get  the  money  for 
which  I  am  waiting." 


Now  the  Fury  in  her  reappeared.  First  of  all 
he  had  to  move  up  into  an  attic,  and  although 
she  and  the  child  had  the  use  of  two  rooms,  she 
deliberately  spoilt  the  remaining  third  room 
which  was  the  dining-room  and  contained 
specially  good  furniture.  She  tore  down  the 
curtains,  took  away  the  pictures,  choked  up  the 
room  with  child's  clothes  and  milk  bottles  with 
the  sole  purpose  of  showing  him  who  was  master 
in  the  house.  The  rooms  looked  now  as  though 
demons  had  dwelt  in  them;  crockery,  kitchen 
utensils,  and  children's  clothes  were  strewn  on 
the  beds  and  sofas. 

She  dished  up  bad  meals  and  the  food  was 
often  burnt.  One  day  she  set  before  him  a 
plate  of  bones  which  the  dogs  seemed  to  have 
gnawed,  and  a  water  bottle.  This  last  was 
an  expression  of  the  greatest  contempt,  for  the 
cellars  were  full  of  beer,  and  no  servant  ever 
engaged  himself  without  stipulating  that  he 
should  have  beer  at  meals.  Accordingly  he 
was  reckoned  beneath  the  men  and  maidservants. 
But  he  kept  patient  and  silent,  for  he  knew  that 
the  journey  money  would  arrive.  This,  how- 
ever, did  not  prevent  his  disgust  rising  to  an 
equal  height  with  her  hatred. 

He  lived  now  in  dirt,  destitution,  and 
wretchedness;  heard  nothing  but  scolding  and 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    201 

shrieking  between  his  wife  and  the  nurse,  his 
wife  and  the  maidservant,  his  wife  and  her 
mother,  while  the  child  cried  continually.  He 
had  an  attack  of  fever  and  inflammation  of  the 
throat,  and  lay  on  his  bed  in  the  attic.  She  did 
not  believe  that  he  was  ill  and  let  him  lie  there. 
On  the  third  day  he  sent  for  the  doctor,  for  he 
could  not  even  drink  water.  Then  his  Fury 
appeared  in  the  doorway.  '  Have  you  sent  for 
the  doctor?  "  she  asked.  '  Do  you  know  what 
that  costs?  " 

"Anyhow  it  will  be  cheaper  than  a  funeral, 
and  it  may  be  diphtheria,  which  is  dangerous 
for  the  child." 

"  Do  you  think  of  the  child?  " 

"  Yes,  a  little." 

If  she  could  now  have  dropped  him  into  the 
sea,  she  would  have  done  it.  But  she  treated 
him  as  though  he  had  the  plague.  The  child, 
her  child,  was  in  danger ! 

'  I  have  experienced  much,"  he  said  in  a 
whisper,  ' '  but  never  have  I  seen  such  intense 
malice  in  anyone."  And  he  wept,  perhaps  for 
the  first  time  in  twenty  years;  wept  over  her 
unworthiness,  and  perhaps  also  over  his  fate  and 
his  humiliation.  When  he  regarded  his  position 
objectively  it  seemed  monstrous  that  he,  a 
distinguished  man  in  his  own  line,  should, 


202    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

without  fault  of  his  own,  lead  such  a  wretched 
life  that  even  the  maidservant  pitied  him.  Since 
he  had  entered  his  relative's  house,  his  behaviour, 
had  been  unimpeachable.  He  did  not  even 
drink,  if  only  for  the  reason  that  there  was 
nothing  to  drink.  Since  his  arrival,  his  plays 
had  met  with  success,  but  instead  of  making  him 
more  respected,  as  success  generally  does  in 
the  case  of  ordinary  mortals,  it  only  tended  to 
deepen  hatred  and  studied  contempt.  The  fact 
that  he  had  accepted  hospitality  from  very  rich 
relatives  was  not  bound  to  weigh  heavily  on  his 
mind,  for  he  was  now  legal  heir  to  half  the 
property.  But  as  hate  now  raged,  he  was  told 
what  his  expenses  were,  and  mention  was  made 
of  payment. 

Again  the  idea  he  had  formerly  had  recurred 
to  him,  that  there  was  something  more  than 
natural  in  all  this,  and  that  an  unseen  hand  was 
controlling  his  destiny.  The  inexplicable  non- 
arrival  of  the  journey  money  seemed  especially 
designed  to  prolong  his  sufferings.  When  other 
letters,  which  he  looked  for,  did  not  come,  he 
began  to  suspect  that  his  wife  had  a  finger  in  the 
matter.  He  began  to  watch  the  mail-bag  which 
the  postman  brought,  and  to  write  to  the  post 
office;  naturally,  the  only  result  was  further 
ignominy. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    208 

Without  having  any  definite  belief,  he  found 
himself  in  a  kind  of  religious  crisis.  He  felt  how 
he  sank  in  this  environment  where  everything 
hinged  on  the  material  and  only  the  animal  side 
of  things  was  prominent — food  and  excrement, 
nurses  regarded  as  milch  cows,  cooks  and  decay- 
ing vegetables;  then  endless  discussions  and  the 
display  of  physical  necessities  which  are  usually 
concealed.  At  the  same  time  excessively  heavy 
rain  had  flooded  a  corridor  and  two  rooms;  the 
water  could  not  be  drained  off  but  stagnated 
and  stank.  The  garden  went  to  ruin  as  no  one 
looked  after  it. 

Then  he  longed  that  he  could  get  far  away, 
somewhere  where  there  was  light  and  purity, 
peace,  love,  and  reconciliation.  He  dreamed 
again  his  old  dream  of  a  convent  within  whose 
walls  he  might  be  sheltered  from  the  world's 
temptations  and  filth,  where  he  might  forget 
and  be  forgotten.  But  he  lacked  faith  and  the 
capacity  for  obedience. 

Literature  at  that  period  had  been  long 
haunted  by  this  idea  of  a  convent.  In  Berlin 
the  suggestion  had  been  made  to  found  a  con- 
vent without  a  creed  for  the  "  intellectuals." 
These  at  a  time  when  industrial  and  economical 
questions  took  the  first  place,  were  uncomfort- 
able in  the  dense  atmosphere  of  a  materialism 


204    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

which  they  themselves  had  been  seduced  into 
preaching.  He  now  wrote  to  a  rich  friend  of 
his  in  Paris  regarding  the  founding  of  such  a 
convent;  drew  up  a  plan  for  the  building,  laid 
down  rules,  and  went  into  details  regarding  the 
ccenobitic  life  and  tasks  of  the  convent  brothers. 
This  was  in  August,  1894.  The  object  pro- 
posed was  the  education  of  man  to  superman 
through  asceticism,  meditation,  and  the  practice 
of  science,  literature,  and  art.  Religion  was 
not  mentioned,  for  one  did  not  know  what  the 
religion  of  the  future  would  be,  or  whether  it 
would  possess  one  at  all. 

His  wife  noticed  that  he  was  becoming  separ- 
ated from  her,  but  she  believed  that  he  was 
thinking  of  Paris  with  its  vanities  and  distrac- 
tions, its  theatres  and  cafes,  gallant  adventures 
and  thirst  for  gold.  His  possible  plans  excited 
her  fear  and  envy.  As  regards  his  historical 
studies,  her  supercilious  smiling  had  ceased  after 
he  had  received  words  of  encouragement  from 
a  great  German  and  a  famous  French  authority, 
and  naturally  had  been  obliged  to  show  their 
letters  in  order  to  protect  himself.  Since  she 
could  no  longer  criticise  his  ideas  she  carried 
the  strife  on  to  another  ground  and  began  to 
plague  him  with  insidious  questions  as  to  how 
much  he  earned  by  his  historical  studies. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    205 

When  his  wife  was  angry  she  went  to  the  old 
people  and  narrated  all  the  small  and  great 
secrets  which  a  married  pair  have  between 
themselves;  she  also  repeated  what  he  in 
moments  of  irritation  had  said  about  them.  She 
was  sorry  afterwards,  but  then  it  was  too  late. 
The  spirit  of  discord  was  aroused,  and  the  storm 
could  no  longer  be  allayed. 

When  he  happened  to  have  money  and  offered 
to  contribute  towards  domestic  expenses,  they 
were  annoyed  at  his  want  of  tact  in  wishing  to 
pay  rich  relatives  for  inviting  him ;  when  he  had 
no  money  then  they  uttered  jeremiads  over  the 
dearness  of  everything  and  sent  him  the  doctor's 
bill.  In  a  word,  nothing  could  be  done  with 
such  uncontrolled  and  incorrigible  people. 

He  often  thought  of  going  on  foot  and  seeking 
some  fellow-countrymen  with  whose  help  he 
might  proceed  farther.  But  every  time  he  made 
the  attempt  he  turned  back,  as  though  he  had 
been  enchanted  and  spellbound,  to  the  little 
stream  where  the  cottage  stood.  He  had  spent 
some  happy  days  there,  and  the  memory  of  these 
held  him  fast.  Moreover,  he  was  thankful  for 
the  past  and  felt  love  to  the  child,  though  he 
dared  not  show  it,  for  then  the  little  one  would 
have  become  a  lime-twig  to  fetter  his  wings. 

One  day  he  had  taken  a  longer  walk  than 


206    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

usual  among  the  picturesque  flooded  meadows 
where  the  deer  sported;  the  pheasants  shot  out 
of  the  bushes  like  rockets,  their  feathers  shining 
with  a  metallic  gleam;  the  storks  fished  in  the 
marsh  and  the  loriots  piped  in  the  poplars.  Here 
he  felt  well,  for  it  was  a  lonely  landscape  where 
no  one  ventured  to  build  a  house  for  fear  of  the 
great  floods. 

For  three-quarters  of  a  year  he  had  come  here 
alone  every  morning.  He  did  not  even  let  his 
wife  accompany  him,  for  he  wished  to  have  this 
landscape  for  himself,  to  see  it  exclusively  with 
his  eyes,  and  to  hear  no  one  else's  voice  there. 
If  he  ever  saw  this  horizon  again,  he  did  not 
wish  to  be  reminded  of  anyone  else. 

Here,  accordingly,  he  was  accustomed  to  find 
himself  again  himself  and  no  one  else.  Here  he 
obtained  his  great  thoughts  and  here  he  held 
his  devotions.  The  incomprehensible  events  of 
the  last  weeks  and  his  deep  suffering  had  caused 
him  to  change  the  word  "  destiny"  for  "  Pro- 
vidence," meaning  thereby  that  a  conscious 
personal  Being  guided  his  course.  In  order  to 
have  a  name,  he  now  called  himself  a  Providen- 
tialist — in  pther  words  he  believed  in  God  with- 
out being  able  to  define  more  distinctly  what  he 
meant  by  that  belief. 

To-day  he  felt  a  pang  of  melancholy  shoot 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    207 

through  him  as  though  he  were  saying  farewell 
to  these  meadows  and  thickets.  Something  was 
impending  which  he  foreboded  and  feared. 

On  coming  home,  he  found  the  house  empty ; 
his  wife  and  child  were  gone.  When  he  at  last 
discovered  the  maidservant  and  asked  where 
his  wife  was,  she  answered  impertinently  :  "  She 
has  gone  away." 

"Where?" 

"To  Odense." 

He  did  not  know  whether  he  believed  it  or 
not.  But  he  found  a  great  charm  in  the  silence 
and  emptiness.  He  breathed  unpoisoned  air, 
enjoyed  the  solitude,  and  went  to  his  work  with 
the  imperturbable  calm  of  a  Buddha.  His 
travelling-bag  was  already  packed,  and  the 
journey  money  might  come  any  day. 

The  afternoon  passed.  As  he  looked  out  of  the 
window,  he  noticed  an  unusual  stillness  round 
the  great  house ;  none  of  the  family  were  to  be 
seen.  But  a  maidservant  was  going  to  and  fro 
between  the  cottage  and  the  house  as  though  she 
were  giving  information.  Once  she  asked  if  he 
wished  for  anything.  "  I  wish  for  nothing,"  he 
answered.  And  that  was  the  truth,  for  his  last 
wish  to  get  out  of  all  this  misery  had  been  ful- 
filled without  his  having  taken  a  step  towards  it. 
He  ate  his  supper  alone  and  enjoyed  it;  then 


208    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

remained  sitting  at  the  table  and  smoked.  His 
mind  accepted  this  fortunate  equipoise  of  the 
scales,  ready  to  sink  on  whichever  side  it  pleased. 
He  guarded  himself  from  forming  any  wish, 
fearing  lest  his  wish  might  be  crossed. 

But  he  expected  something.  "If  I  know 
women  rightly,"  he  said  to  himself,  "she  will 
not  be  able  to  sleep  to-night  without  sending  a 
messenger  to  see  whether  the  victim  is  suffering 
according  to  her  calculations." 

And  sure  enough  his  mother-in-law  came. 
"Good  evening,"  she  said;  "  are  you  sitting 
here  alone,  my  son?  '' 

With  the  stoicism  of  an  Indian  before  the  fire 
which  is  to  roast  him,  he  answered  :  ' '  Yes,  I  am 
sitting  alone." 

"  And  what  are  you  thinking  of  doing  now?  " 

"Of  going,  naturally." 
'  You  seem  to  take  this  matter  very  quietly." 

"Why  not?" 

"  Maria  intends  to  seek  for  a  separation." 

"  I  can  imagine  it." 

"  Then  you  don't  love  her." 
4  You  wish  that  I  should  love  her  in  order  that 
I  may  suffer  more." 

' '  Can  you  suffer — you  ?  ' J 
'  You  would  be  glad  if  I  could." 
'  When  are  you  thinking  of  going?  " 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    209 

'  When  I  get  the  journey  money." 

'  You  have  said  that  so  often." 

'  You  don't  want  to  put  me  out  on  the  high 
road  to-night?  " 

'  Grandmother  is  much  excited." 
'  Then  she  should  read  her  evening  prayers 
attentively." 

"  One  doesn't  get  far  with  you." 

"  No,  why  should  I  allow  it?  " 

"Good  night."     Then  she  went. 

He  slept  well  and  deeply  as  if  after  an  event 
which  he  had  long  expected. 

The  next  morning  he  woke  up  with  the  dis- 
tinct idea  :  "  She  has  not  gone;  she  is  keeping 
somewhere  in  the  neighbourhood." 

When  he  went  out,  he  saw  the  maid  getting  into 
the  ferry-boat  with  some  of  the  child's  things. 

"Ha,  ha,"  then  he  understood.  She  was 
waiting  on  the  other  side  of  the  stream.  The 
maid  came  back  soon,  after  he  had  watched  her 
manoeuvres  on  the  other  side  through  his  opera- 
glass.  "  If  I  only  keep  quiet  now,"  he  thought, 
"  the  imperialists  are  routed." 

His  mother-in-law  came  and  looked  uneasy 
but  yielding.      '  Well,  now  you  are  alone  my  son 
and  will  never  see  her  any  more." 
'  Is  she  then  so  far  away  ?  ' ' 

"Yes." 


210    FAIE   HAVEN   AND    FOTTL    STRAND 

He  laughed  and  looked  over  the  water. 
'Well,"    said  the    old   woman,  "since  you 
know  it,  go  after  her." 

"No,  I  won't  do  that." 

"But  she  won't  come  first." 

"  First  or  last,  it  is  all  the  same  to  me." 

The  boat  went  to  and  fro  with  messages  the 
whole  day. 

In  the  afternoon  his  mother-in-law  came 
again.  "You  must  take  the  first  step,"  she 
said.  '  Maria  is  desperate  and  will  be  ill  if  you 
don't  write  to  her  and  ask  her  to  come  again." 

' '  How  do  you  know  that  I  want  to  have  her 
again?  A  wife  who  remains  a  night  out  of  her 
house  has  forfeited  her  conjugal  rights  and  in- 
jured her  husband's  honour." 

This  was  an  expected  parry,  and  his  mother- 
in-law  beat  a  sudden  retreat.  She  crossed  over  in 
the  ferry-boat  and  remained  there  till  evening. 
He  was  sitting  in  his  room  and  writing  when 
his  wife  entered  with  an  air  as  though  she  were 
sorry  for  his  trouble  and  came  in  response  to  his 
pressing  call.  He  could  have  laid  her  prostrate 
but  did  not  do  so,  being  magnanimous  towards 
the  conquered.  When  he  had  his  wife  and  child 
back  in  the  house  he  found  it  just  as  good 
as  when  they  were  away,  perhaps  even  a  little 
better. 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    211 

In  the  evening  the  journey  money  came.  His 
position  was  now  altered,  and  he  had  the  keys 
to  the  dungeon  in  his  hand.  At  the  same  moment 
his  wife  saw  the  matter  from  another  point  of 
view.  '  Do  you  know,"  she  said,  "  this  life  is 
killing  me;  I  have  not  read  a  single  book  since 
the  child  came,  and  I  have  not  written  an  article 
for  a  year.  I  will  go  with  you  to  Paris." 

"  Let  me  go  in  front,"  he  said,  "  and  spy  out 
the  land." 

"  Then  I  shall  never  get  away." 

He  persuaded  her  to  remain,  without  having 
formed  any  distinct  purpose  of  leaving  her;  he 
only  longed  to  feel  himself  free  for  a  time  at 
any  rate. 

But  she  was  now  ready  to  leave  her  child,  ' '  the 
most  important  person  of  all,"  as  she  called  it, 
in  order  to  come  out  into  the  world  and  play  a 
part  there.  She  knew  well  that  he  was  not  going 
to  seek  an  uncertain  fortune  but  to  reap  the 
fruits  of  a  success  which  he  had  already  gained. 
The  ambitious  and  independent  woman  again 
came  into  view,  perhaps  also  the  envious  rival, 
for  she  had  moments  in  which  she  regarded  her- 
self as  an  author,  superior  to  him.  That  was 
when  her  friends  in  a  letter  had  called  her  a 
*  genius ' '  ;  this  letter  she  left  lying  about  that 
it  might  be  read. 


212    FAIR  HAVEN  ATO)    FOUL    STRAKD 

Fortunately  it  was  not  possible  for  her  to 
travel  just  now,  because  her  parents  held  her 
back;  she  had  to  content  herself  with  the  fact 
that  he,  who  might  be  considered  as  expelled, 
was  leaving  her.  She  became  mild,  emotional, 
and  sensitive,  so  that  the  parting  was  really 
painful. 

So  he  went  out  into  the  world  again.  As  the 
steamer  in  the  beautiful  autumn  evening  worked 
its  way  up  the  river,  he  saw  again  the  cottage, 
whose  windows  were  lit  up.  All  the  evil  and 
ugliness  he  had  seen  there  was  now  obliterated ; 
he  hardly  felt  a  fleeting  joy  at  having  escaped 
this  prison  in  which  he  had  suffered  so  terribly. 
Only  feelings  of  gratitude  and  melancholy  pos- 
sessed him.  For  a  moment  the  bond  which 
united  him  to  wife  and  child  drew  him  so 
strongly  that  he  wanted  to  throw  himself  into  the 
water.  But  the  steamer  paddles  made  some 
powerful  forward  strokes,  the  bond  stretched 
itself,  stretched  itself,  and  broke ! 

'  That  was  an  infernal  story,"  exclaimed 
the  postmaster  when  the  reading  was  over. 
'  What  can  one  say  about  it,  except  what  you 
yourself  have  said  in  it?  But  do  you  think, 
generally  speaking,  that  marriage  will  continue 
to  exist?" 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    213 

'  Although  I  regard  wif eL  child  and  home  as 
desirable  objects,"  answered  the  doctor,  "  I  do 
not  think  lifelong  marriages  will  be  long  possible^ 
for  in  our  days  the  individual — man  or  woman — 
is  too  egotistic  and  desirous  of  independence. 
You  see  yourself  the  direction  which  social  evo- 
lution is  taking.  We  hear  of  nothing  but  discon- 
tent and  divorce.  I  grant  that  conjugal  life 
demands  consideration  and  yieldingness,  but  to 
live  suppressing  one's  innermost  wishes  in  an 
atmosphere  of  contradiction  and  contrariety,  can 
only  end  in  producing  Furies.  You  have  been 
married?  " 

The  question  came  somewhat  suddenly  and  the 
answer  was  only  given  with  hesitation :  ' '  Yes, 
I  have  been  married  but  am  not  a  widower." 

"  Divorced  then?  " 

"Yes!  and  you?" 

"  Divorced." 

' '  If  anyone  asked  us  why,  neither  you  nor  I 
could  give  a  reason." 

'  A  reason — no.  I  only  know  that  if  we  had 
continued  to  live  together,  I  should  have  ended 
as  a  homicide,  and  she  as  a  murderess.  Isn't 
that  enough?  ' 

"Quite   enough." 

And  they  took  their  supper. 


HERR  BENGT'S  WIFE 


HERE  BENGT'S    WIFE 

'  WHAT  is  love?  Desire,  of  course,"  the  young 
Count  answered  his  old  preceptor,  as  they  both 
sat  below  in  the  cabin  and  beguiled  the  time  by 
talking  while  waiting  off  Elfsnabben  for  a  favour- 
able wind  for  their  journey  to  the  University  of 
Prague. 

"No,  young  sir,"  answered  Magister 
Franciscus  Olai.  '  Love  is  something  quite 
different  and  something  more,  which  neither 
high  theology  nor  deep  philosophy  have  been 
able  to  express.  Our  over-wise  time  believes  too 
little,  but  that  is  because  our  fathers  believed 
too  much.  I  was  present  at  the  beginning  of  this 
period,  young  sir;  I  helped  to  pull  down  old 
venerable  buildings,  ancient,  decayed  temples 
of  pride  and  selfishness;  I  tore  pages  out  of  the 
holy  books  and  pictures  from  the  walls  of  the 
churches;  I  was  present,  young  sir,  and  helped 
to  shut  up  the  convents,  and  to  announce  the 
abolition  of  the  old  faith,  but,  sir,  there  are 

things   which   all-powerful    Nature    herself   has 

217 


218    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

founded,  and  which  we  had  better  not  attempt 
to  pull  down.  I  wish  to  speak  now  of  Amor  or 
Love,  whose  fire  burns  unquenchably  when  it  is 
rightly  bestowed,  but  when  wrongly,  can  soon 
be  quenched,  or  even  turn  to  hate  when  things 
go  quite  wrong." 

'  When  then  is  it  rightly  bestowed  ?  It  cannot 
be  so  very  often,"  answered  the  Count,  settling 
himself  more  comfortably  on  the  couch. 

'  Often  or  not,  love  is  like  a  flash  from 
heaven  when  it  comes,  and  then  it  surpasses  all 
our  will  and  all  our  understanding,  but  it  is 
different  with  different  people,  whether  it  lasts 
or  not.  For  in  this  respect  men  are  born  with 
different  dispositions  and  characters,  like  birds 
or  other  creatures.  Some  are  like  the  wood 
grouse  and  black  cock  who  must  have  a  whole 
seraglio  like  the  grand  Turk;  why  it  is  so  we 
know  not,  but  it  is  so,  and  that  is  their  nature. 
Others  are  like  the  small  birds  which  take  a  mate 
for  each  year  and  then  change.  Others  again 
are  amiable  like  doves  and  build  their  nests  to- 
gether for  life,  and  when  one  of  them  dies,  the 
other  no  longer  desires  to  live." 

' '  Have  you  seen  any  human  beings  corres- 
ponding to  doves?"  asked  the  Count  doubt- 
fully. 

"  I  have  seen  many,  dear  sir.     I  have  seen 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    219 

wood  cocks  who  have  paired  with  doves,  and  the 
doves  have  been  very  unhappy;  I  have  seen 
male  doves  who  have  wedded  a  cuckoo,  and  the 
cuckoo  is  the  worst  of  all  birds,  for  it  likes  the 
pleasure  of  love,  but  not  the  trouble  of  children, 
and  therefore  turns  its  children  out  of  the  nest; 
but  I  have  also  seen  wedded  doves,  sir." 

"  Who  never  pecked  each  other?  ' 

' '  Yes,  I  have  seen  them  peck  when  the  nest 
was  narrow,  and  there  was  trouble  about  food, 
but  still  they  were  good  friends,  and  that  is  love. 
There  is  also  a  sea-bird  called  '  svart,'  sir, 
which  always  flies  in  pairs.  If  you  shoot  one,  the 
other  descends  and  lets  itself  be  shot  too,  and 
therefore  the  '  svart '  is  called  the  stupidest  of 
all  birds." 

' '  That  is  in  the  pairing  time,  venerable 
preceptor." 

' '  No,  young  sir,  they  keep  together  the  whole 
year  round  and  their  pairing  time  is  in  spring. 
In  the  winter  when  they  have  no  young  ones 
with  them,  but  are  alone,  they  eat  together,  hunt 
together,  and  sleep  together.  That  is  not  desire, 
but  love,  and  if  this  charming  feeling  can  exist 
among  soulless  creatures,  why  can  it  not  among 
men?" 

'  Yes,  I  have  heard  of  its  being  found  among 
men,  but  that  it  departs  after  marriage." 


220    FAIR  HAVEfr  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

' '  That  is  mere  sensual  pleasure,  which  partly 
goes,  but  then  love  comes." 

"That  is  only  friendship  when  there  is  any." 

"  Quite  right,  noble  sir,  but  friendship  be- 
tween those  of  opposite  sex  is  just  love.  But 
there  are  so  many  things  and  so  many  sides  to 
everything.  If  you  like,  I  will  relate  a  story 
which  I  have  seen  myself,  and  from  which  you 
may  learn  something  or  other.  It  happened  in 
my  youth,  forty  years  ago,  but  I  remember  every 
detail  as  though  it  happened  yesterday.  Shall 
I  relate  it?  " 

"Certainly,  preceptor.  Time  goes  slowly 
when  one  waits  for  a  favourable  wind.  But 
bring  a  light  and  wine  before  you  begin,  for  I 
think  your  story  will  not  keep  one  awake." 

' '  Very  likely  not  you,  sir,  but  it  has  kept 
me  awake  many  nights,"  answered  Franciscus, 
and  went  to  fetch  what  was  required.  When  he 
had  returned  and  they  sat  down  again  on  their 
berths,  he  began  as  follows  : 

'  This  is  the  story  of  Herr  Bengt's  wife. 
She  was  born  of  noble  parentage  at  the  beginning 
of  this  century.  She  was  strictly  brought  up, 
and,  when  her  parents  died,  her  guardian  placed 
her  in  a  convent.  There  she  distinguished  her- 
self by  her  intense  religious  zeal;  she  scourged 
herself  on  Fridays  and  fasted  on  all  the  greater 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    221 

saint's  days.  When  she  reached  the  age  of 
puberty,  her  condition  became  more  serious, 
and  she  actually  attempted  to  starve  herself  to 
death,  believing  it  consistent  with  the  duty  of  a 
Christian  to  kill  the  flesh  and  to  live  with  God  in 
Christ.  Then  two  circumstances  contributed  to 
bring  about  a  crisis  in  her  life.  Her  guardian  fled 
the  country  after  having  squandered  her  prop- 
erty, and  the  convent  authorities  changed  their 
behaviour  towards  her,  for  it  was  a  worldly 
institution  which  did  not  at  all  open  its  gates 
for  the  poor  and  wretched.  When  she  saw  that, 
she  began  to  be  assailed  by  doubts.  Doubt  was 
the  disease  of  that  time  and  she  had  a  strong 
attack  of  it.  Her  fellow-nuns  believed  nothing 
and  her  superiors  not  much. 

' '  One  day  she  was  sent  from  the  convent  to 
visit  a  sick  person.  On  the  way,  a  beautiful 
lonely  forest  path,  she  met  a  Knight,  young, 
strong,  and  handsome.  She  stood  and  stared  at 
him  as  though  he  had  been  a  vision;  he  was  the 
first  man  she  had  seen  for  five  years,  and  the  first 
man  she  had  seen  since  she  was  a  woman.  He 
stopped  his  horse  for  a  moment,  greeted  her, 
and  rode  on.  After  that  day  she  was  tired  of 
the  convent,  and  life  enticed  her.  Life  with  its 
beauty  and  attraction  drew  her  away  from  Christ ; 
she  had  attacks  of  temptation  and  outbreaks, 


222    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOTJL    STRAND 

and  had  to  spend  most  of  her  time  in  the 
punishment  cell.  One  day  she  received  a  letter 
smuggled  in  by  the  gardener.  It  was  from  the 
Knight.  He  lived  on  the  other  side  of  the  lake 
and  she  could  see  his  castle  from  the  window  of 
the  cell.  The  correspondence  continued.  Faint 
rumours  began  to  be  circulated  that  a  great 
change  in  ecclesiastical  affairs  was  about  to  take 
place  and  that  even  the  convents  were  about  to 
be  abolished  and  the  nuns  released  from  their 
vows. 

'  Then  hope  awoke  in  her,  but  at  the  same 
time  that  she  learnt  that  one  could  be  released 
from  vows,  she  lost  faith  in  the  sanctity  of  the 
vow  itself,  and  at  one  stroke  all  restraint  gave 
way.  She  believed  now  rather  in  the  everlasting 
rights  of  her  instincts  in  the  face  of  all  social  and 
eccesiastical  laws ! 

"At  last  she  was  betrayed  by  a  false  friend, 
and  the  discovery  of  the  correspondence  led  to 
her  being  condemned  to  corporal  punishment. 
But  Fate  had  ordered  otherwise,  and  on  the  day 
that  the  punishment  was  to  be  carried  out  a 
messenger  came  from  the  King  and  estates  of 
the  realm  with  the  command  that  the  convent 
was  to  be  closed.  The  messenger  was  no  other 
than  the  Knight.  He  opened  for  her  the  doors 
of  the  convent  in  order  to  offer  her  freedom  and 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    223 

his  hand.  That  closed  the  first  part  of  her 
career." 

"The  first?'  remarked  the  Count,  as  he 
lifted  the  jar  of  Ehine  wine.  "Isn't  the  story 
over?  They  were  married." 

"No,  sir.  That  is  how  stories  usually  end, 
but  the  real  beginning  is  just  there.  And  I 
remember  the  day  after  the  marriage.  I  had 
married  them  and  was  her  domestic  chaplain. 
The  breakfast-table  was  laid  and  she  came  out 
of  her  room,  beaming  as  though  the  whole  earth 
danced  on  her  account,  and  the  sun  was  only 
set  in  the  sky  to  give  them  light.  He  was  full  of 
courage  and  felt  capable  of  bearing  the  whole 
world  on  his  shoulders.  All  his  thoughts  were 
intent  on  making  life  as  kind  and  beautiful  for 
her  as  he  could ;  and  she  was  so  happy  that  she 
could  neither  eat  nor  drink;  she  wished  only  to 
forget  the  existence  of  the  sinful  earth.  Well! 
she  had  her  fancies,  springing  from  the  old  time 
when  heaven  was  all,  and  earth  was  nothing ;  he 
was  a  child  of  the  new  age  who  knew  that  one 
must  live  on  earth  in  order  to  be  able  to  enter 
heaven  afterwards." 

' '  And  so  things  came  to  a  crisis  ?  '  inter- 
rupted the  Count. 

"  They  came  to  a  crisis,  as  you  say.  I 
remember  how  he  ate  at  the  breakfast-table  like 


224    FAIR  HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

a  hungry  man,  and  she  only  sat  and  watched 
him;  but  when  she  talked  of  birds*  songs  he 
talked  of  roast  veal.  Then  he  noticed  how  she 
had  thrown  her  clothes  the  evening  before  on  a 
chair  in  the  dining-room,  and  reminded  her  that 
one  must  be  orderly  in  a  house." 

'  Then  of  course  there  was  hell  in  the  house." 
'  No,  it  was  not  so  dangerous  as  that.  But  it 
brought  a  cloud  over  her  sun,  and  she  felt  that 
a  breach  was  opened  between  them.  Still  she 
shut  her  eyes  in  order  not  to  see  it,  as  one  does 
when  near  a  precipice.  Then  the  sky  clouded 
over  again.  He  had  secret,  melancholy  thoughts 
for  his  harvest-sheaves  were  on  the  field,  and  he 
knew  that  his  income  depended  on  them.  He 
wished  to  take  her  out  to  see  them,  but  she 
begged  him  to  stay  at  home  and  not  to  talk  of 
earth  on  that  day." 

"Earth!    What  an  idiot!  " 

' '  Yes,  yes  !  She  was  brought  up  like  that ; 
it  was  the  fault  of  the  convent  which  had  taught 
her  to  despise  God's  creation.  So  her  husband 
remained  with  her,  and  proposed  that  they 
should  go  hunting;  she  accepted  the  proposal 
with  joy." 

' '  A  proposal  to  kill !    That  was  nice  !  ' : 

"Yes,  according  to  the  views  of  the  period, 
sjr;  every  period  has  its  own  views.  But  the 


sky  clouded  over  once  more,  for  this  day  was 
not  a  lucky  one  for  the  young  Knight.  The 
King's  bailiff  called  and  desired  a  special  inter- 
view with  him.  The  interview  was  granted  and 
the  Knight  was  informed  that  he  would  lose  his 
rank  as  a  noble  if  he  did  not  supply  the  quota  of 
arms  due  from  him  as  the  King's  vassal,  which 
he  had  neglected  to  do  for  h've  years.  The 
Knight  had  no  means  of  meeting  this  demand 
but  the  bailiff  offered  to  procure  him  an  advance 
in  money  in  exchange  for  a  mortgage  on  his 
estate.  So  the  matter  was  arranged.  But  then 
the  question  arose  how  far  he  should  take  his 
wife  into  his  confidence  with  regard  to  this 
matter.  He  summoned  me  in  order  to  hear  my 
advice.  I  thought  it  was  a  pity  that  the  young 
wife  should  be  torn  so  suddenly  out  of  her  dreams 
of  happiness  and  joy,  and  I  was  short-sighted 
enough  to  advise  that  she  should  not  be  told 
the  real  state  of  affairs  till  the  first  year  was 
over." 

' '  In  that  you  were  right !  Why  should  women 
mix  in  business?  It  would  only  lead  to  trouble 
and  confusion  and  their  poor  husbands  would 
never  have  peace." 

"  No,  sir,  I  was  wrong,  for  in  a  true  marriage 
husband  and  wife  should  have  full  confidence 
in  each  other  and  be  one.  And  what  was  the 

P 


226    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOtfL 

result  in  this  case?  During  the  year  they  grew 
apart  from  one  another.  She  lived  in  her  rose- 
garden  and  he  in  the  fields;  he  had  secrets  con- 
cealed from  her  and  worked  desperately  without 
having  her  as  his  adviser;  he  lived  his  own  life 
apart  and  she,  hers.  When  they  met,  he  had  to 
pretend  to  be  cheerful,  and  so  their  whole  life 
became  false.  Finally  he  became  tired  and 
withdrew  into  himself  and  so  did  she." 

'  And  so  it  was  all  over  with  their  love." 
'  No,  sir;  it  might  have  been  so,  but  true 
love  goes  through  worse  fires  than  these.  They 
loved  each  other  still  and  that  was  destined  to 
be  proved  by  the  tests  which  they  were  to  pass 
through. 

' '  Her  child  came,  and  with  it  commenced  a 
new  stage  of  their  life  journey.  She  needed  her 
husband  less  now  for  her  time  was  occupied  by 
looking  after  the  child,  and  her  husband  felt 
freer,  for  so  many  claims  were  not  made  on  his 
tenderness  as  before.  She  threw  herself  heart 
and  soul  into  the  new  occupations  which 
absorbed  her;  she  watched  through  the  nights 
and  toiled  through  the  days  and  would  never 
give  up  the  child  to  a  nurse  The  contact  with 
reality  and  the  little  affairs  of  life  seemed  at  first 
to  have  an  intoxicating  effect  upon  her  empty 
soul  and  she  began  to  find  a  certain  satisfaction 


FAIE    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    227 

in  talking  with  her  husband  about  his  fields  and 
their  cultivation.    But  this  could  not  last  long. 
Education  lies  behind  us  like  the  seeds  of  weeds 
which  may  remain  in  the  ground  for  a  year  or 
two,  but  which  only  need  proper  cultivation  in 
order  to  spring  up  again.     One  day  she  looked 
in  the  glass  and  found  that  she  had  become  pale, 
thin,  and  ugly.    She  saw  that  the  bloom  of  her 
youth  was  past,  and  her  charms  decayed.    Then 
the  woman  awoke  in  her  or  rather  one  side  of  the 
mysterious  being  which  is  called  a  woman :  and 
then  came  the  longing  to  be  beautiful,  to  please, 
to  feel  herself  ruling  through  her  beauty.     She 
was  now  no  longer  so  eagerly  occupied  with  the 
child  as  before,  and  she  began  to  spend  more 
care  on  her  own  person.    Her  husband  saw  this 
change  with  joy,  for  strange  to  say  although  he 
had  at  first  been  glad  to  observe  her  desperate 
zeal  about  the  child  and  the  house,  yet  when  he 
saw  his  heart's  queen  dressed  negligently,   and 
marked  how  pale  and  wretched  she  looked,  it 
cut  him  to  the  heart.     He  wished  to  have  back 
again  the  charming  fairy  who  had  waited  with 
longing  at  the  window  for  his  return  home,  and 
at  whose  feet  he  wished  to  worship.    So  strange 
is  man's  heart,  and  so  much  leaven  does  it  still 
retain  from  the  old  times  of  chivalry  when  woman 
was  regarded  as  a  Madonna. 


228    FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND 

'  But  now  came  something  else.  During  the 
iirst  period  of  her  confinement  he  had  become  a 
little  tired  and  careless  in  his  habits;  he  came 
and  went  with  his  hat  on,  ate  his  meals  at  a 
corner  of  the  table,  and  took  no  pains  about  his 
dress.  And  when  his  wife  began  to  return  to  the 
ways  of  everyday  life  he  forgot  to  follow  her, 
and  to  alter  his  habits.  His  wife,  who  was  still 
somewhat  sickly,  thought  she  saw  in  the  relaxing 
of  these  courtesies  a  want  of  love,  and  an  unfor- 
tunate chance  afforded  her  an  apparent  proof 
that  he  was  tired  of  her. 

' '  It  was  an  unlucky  day !  The  year  was 
approaching  its  end  when  the  chief  payments 
would  be  made.  The  harvest  promised  to  be 
bountiful  but  its  overplus  could  not  cover  every- 
thing. The  Knight  had  to  find  other  means  of 
raising  money,  and  he  found  them.  He  ordered 
some  fine  timber-trees  round  the  courtyard  to  be 
cut  down,  but  in  so  doing,  they  came  too  near 
the  house,  so  that  his  wife's  favourite  lime-tree 
was  also  cut  down.  The  Knight  did  not  know 
that  she  had  a  special  liking  for  it,  and  the  act 
was  quite  unintentional.  His  wife  had  been  ill 
for  a  week  or  two,  and  when  she  came  into  the 
dining-room  she  saw  that  the  lime-tree  had  dis- 
appeared; she  at  once  believed  that  it  had  been 
cut  down  to  annoy  her.  She  also  noticed  that 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    229 

her  rose-bushes  had  withered,  for  no  one  had 
had  time  to  think  of  such  trifles  amid  all  the 
bustle  of  bringing  in  the  harvest.  This  seemed 
to  her  another  act  of  unkindness  and  she  sent 
all  the  available  horses  and  oxen  to  fetch 
water. 

"  Now  there  intervened  a  new  circumstance 
to  hasten  the  coming  misfortune.  The  bailiff  had 
come  to  the  castle  to  wait  for  the  bringing  in  of 
the  harvest,  and  had  an  interview  with  the 
Knight's  wife  just  after  she  had  made  the  two 
above-mentioned  discoveries.  They  found  that 
they  had  known  each  other  as  children,  and  a 
confidential  chat  followed,  which  afforded  her 
some  amusement.  She  liked  her  visitor's  rustic 
but  courteous  manners,  and  the  comparison  she 
made  between  his  politeness  and  her  husband's 
boorishness,  was  not  to  the  advantage  of  the 
latter.  She  forgot  that  her  husband  could  be  as 
polite  as  the  bailiff  when  paying  a  formal  visit, 
and  that  the  bailiff  could  be  as  brusque  as  he  in 
everyday  business. 

Thus  everything  was  in  train  for  what  should 
happen  when  her  husband  came  home.  The 
bailiff  had  gone  and  left  her  alone  with  her 
thoughts.  When  her  husband  came  in,  he  was 
cheerful,  being  pleased  to  see  his  wife  up  again, 
and  because  the  continued  dry  weather  was  goocl 


230    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

for  the  harvest,  which  was  all  now  ready  cut  and 
could  be  brought  in  in  a  single  day.  But  his  wife, 
depressed  by  her  thoughts,  felt  annoyed  by  his 
cheerfulness,  and  now  the  shots  went  off,  one 
after  the  other.  She  asked  about  her  lime-tree, 
and  he  said  he  had  cut  it  down  because  he 
required  timber;  she  then  asked  why  he  must 
cut  down  '  just  '  the  lime-tree  which  shaded  her 
window ;  he  answered  that  he  had  not  cut  down 
just  that  one,  but  all  of  them  together. 

'Then  she  began  about  the  rose-bushes.  He 
replied  that  he  had  never  promised  to  water 
them.  She,  having  no  answer  to  this,  discovered 
that  he  was  wearing  greased  boots,  and  immedi- 
ately remarked  upon  it.  He  acknowledged  his 
inadvertence  and  was  about  to  repair  it  on  the 
spot  by  drawing  them  off,  but  she  became  furious 
at  such  an  act  of  discourtesy.  Hard  words  passed 
between  them  and  she  declared  that  he  loved 
her  no  more.  Then  the  Knight  answered  some- 
what in  this  way :  '  I  don't  love  you,  you 
say,  because  I  work  for  you  and  don't  sit  and 
gossip  by  your  embroidery  frame;  I  don't  love 
you  because  I  am  hungry  through  neglecting 
food;  I  don't  love  you  because  I  don't  change 
my  boots  when  I  come  for  a  minute  into  the 
room.  I  don't  love  you,  you  say !  Oh,  if  you 
only  knew  how  much  I  loved  you ! ' 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    231 

'  To  this  his  wife  replied  :  '  before  we  married 
you  loved  me  and  at  the  same  time  gossiped  by 
my  embroidery  frame,  took  off  your  boots  when 
you  came  in,  and  showed  me  politeness.  What 
has  happened  then,  to  make  you  change  your 
behaviour?  ' 

: '  Her  husband  answered  :  '  We  are  married 
now.'  His  wife  thought  he  meant  that  marriage 
had  given  him  a  proprietary  right  over  her,  and 
that  he  wished  to  show  this  by  his  free-and-easy 
demeanour,  but  this  last  was  simply  due  to  his 
unshakeable  trust  in  her  vow  to  love  him  through 
joy  and  sorrow,  and  in  her  forbearance,  if,  in 
order  to  avoid  loss  of  time,  he  dropped  a  number 
of  little  empty  ceremonies.  He  was  on  the  point 
of  telling  her  that  it  was  in  order  to  stave  off  ruin 
that  he  worked  in  the  fields,  thought  only  of 
crops,  tramped  in  the  mud,  and  brought  dirt  into 
the  house,  but  he  kept  silence,  for  he  thought  that 
in  her  weak  state,  she  could  not  bear  the  shock, 
and  he  knew  that  in  twenty-four  hours  all  danger 
would  be  passed  and  the  house  would  be  saved. 
He  asked  her  to  forgive  him,  and  they  forgave 
one  another,  and  spoke  gently  together  again. 
But  then  came  a  shock !  The  steward  rushed  in 
and  announced  that  a  storm  was  approaching. 
The  Knight's  wife  was  glad  that  the  roses  would 
get  rain,  but  he  was  not.  It  seemed  to  him  like 


232    FAIR   HAVEN  AND   FOTJL    STRAND 

the  finger  of  God,  and  he  told  his  wife  every- 
thing but  bade  her  at  the  same  time  be  of  good 
courage.  He  then  gave  orders  that  all  the  oxen 
should  be  yoked  and  the  harvest  brought  in  at 
once.  He  was  told  that  they  had  been  sent  to 
fetch  water.  Who  had  sent  them?  '  I  did/ 
answered  his  wife.  '  I  wanted  water  for  my 
flowers,  which  you  allowed  to  be  dried  up,  while 
I  was  ill.' 

'  Aren't  you  ashamed  to  say  you  did?  '  asked 
the  Knight. 

: '  She  answered  :  '  You  plume  yourself  on  hav- 
ing deceived  me  for  a  whole  year.  I  have  no  need 
to  be  ashamed  of  telling  the  truth,  since  I  have 
committed  no  fault,  but  only  met  with  a  mis- 
fortune.' Then  he  became  furious,  went  to  her 
with  upraised  hand,  and  struck  her." 

"And  served  her  devilish  right!"  said  the 
Count. 

' '  Fie  !  Fie  !  young  sir  !  To  strike  a  weak 
woman !  ' 

'  Why  should  one  not  strike  a  woman,  when 
one  strikes  children?" 

"  Because  woman  is  weaker,  sir." 

' '  Another  reason !  One  cannot  get  at  the 
stronger,  and  one  must  not  strike  the  weaker  : 
Whom  shall  one  strike  then  ? ' ' 

"One  should  not  strike  at  all,   my  friend. 


FAIK    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    233 

Fie !  Fie !  What  sentiments  you  utter,  and  you 
wish  to  be  a  soldier !  ' 

' '  Yes !  What  happens  in  war  ?  The  stronger 
strikes  and  the  weaker  is  struck.  Isn't  that  logic?" 

"  It  may  be  logic,  but  it  is  not  morality.  But 
do  you  want  to  hear  the  continuation  ? ' ' 

"  Wasn't  it  over  then,  with  their  love  at  any 
rate?" 

"  No,  sir  !  not  by  a  long  way !  Love  does  not 
depart  so  easily.  Well !  she  believed  now  just  as 
you  do,  that  it  was  all  over  with  love,  and  she 
asked  the  bailiff,  who  came  in  just  then,  to  make 
an  appeal  for  separation  in  her  name  to  the 
King." 

"  And  she  wanted  to  leave  her  child?  " 

"No,  she  thought  she  could  take  it  with  her. 
Her  pride  was  wounded  to  the  quick,  and  she 
felt  crushed  under  the  ruins  of  her  beautiful 
castle  in  the  air." 

"And  her  husband?" 

1 '  He  was  pulverised  !  His  dream  of  wedded 
love  was  over,  and  he  was  ruined  besides,  for 
the  rainstorm  had  carried  away  and  destroyed 
the  whole  of  his  harvest.  And  when  he  saw  that 
it  was  she  whom  he  loved  who  was  the  cause  of 
his  misfortune  he  felt  resentment  in  his  heart 
against  her,  but  he  loved  her  still,  when  his  anger 
had  been  allayed," 


234    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

"Still?" 

'  Yes,  sir,  for  love  does  not  ask  why.  It  only 
knows  that  it  is  so.  The  Knight  was  ruined,  and 
left  his  house  to  look  after  itself  while  he  rode 
about  in  the  woods  and  fields.  His  wife,  on  the 
contrary,  awoke  to  a  life  of  energy  and  diligence 
and  took  in  hand  the  whole  management  of  the 
house;  necessity  made  the  little,  tender  being 
who  never  had  worked,  strong;  she  sewed 
clothes  for  herself  and  the  children;  she  made 
payments  and  looked  after  the  servants,  and 
this  last  was  not  the  easiest,  for  the  latter  had 
grown  accustomed  to  regard  the  little  spoilt  lady 
as  only  a  guest,  but  she  took  hold  of  affairs  with 
an  energetic  hand  and  kept  them  in  order.  When 
money  was  insufficient  she  pawned  her  jewels, 
and  by  that  means  paid  wages  and  cleared  off 
debts.  One  day  when  the  Knight  awoke  to 
reflection  and  came  home  anxiously  to  look  after 
the  condition  of  affairs  which  he  regarded  as 
hopeless,  he  found  everything  in  proper  order. 
When  he  made  inquiries,  he  was  told  that  his 
wife  had  saved  everything.  Then  remorse  and 
shame  awoke  in  him  and  he  went  to  ask  her  on 
his  knees  to  forgive  him  for  not  having  under- 
stood and  valued  her.  She  forgave  him  and 
declared  that  she  had  not  formerly  deserved  to 
be  more  highly  valued,  since  she  did  not  then 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOTJL    STRAND    235 

possess  the  qualities  which  she  afterwards 
acquired.  They  were  reconciled  as  friends,  but 
she  declared  that  her  love  was  dead,  and  that  she 
did  not  intend  to  be  his  wife  for  the  future. 

'  Their  conversation  was  interrupted  by  the 
bailiff,  who  during  this  time  had  lived  in  the 
house  and  helped  the  wife  by  his  advice  and 
service.  Her  husband  felt  himself  put  aside  and 
his  place  occupied  by  another;  jealousy  raged 
in  him,  and  he  forbade  his  wife  to  receive  a 
stranger  in  her  rooms.  His  wife  thereupon  de- 
clared that  she  would  visit  the  bailiff  in  his  rooms 
but  her  husband  reminded  her  that  he  had 
rights  over  her  person,  since  she  was  still  his 
wife  according  to  the  law.  But  she  had  th'at  day 
received  by  post  the  decree  of  separation  and 
told  him  that  she  was  free  and  could  go  where 
she  liked.  Then  when  he  saw  that  it  was  all 
over,  he  collapsed  and  begged  her  on  his  knees 
to  remain.  When  she  saw  the  proud  Knight 
crawling  on  the  ground  like  a  slave  she  lost  the 
last  remnants  of  respect  for  him,  and  when  she 
remembered  how  once  in  her  weakness  and 
misery,  she  had  looked  up  to  him  as  the  one  who 
could  carry  her  in  his  arms  over  thorns  and 
stones,  she  wished  to  fly  from  this  spectacle. 
Being  no  more  able  to  find  in  him,  what  he  had 
once  been  to  her,  she  simply  went  away." 


236    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

'  Well  now,"  interrupted  the  Count,  who 
began  to  be  bored,  "  it  really  was  over." 

'  No,  no,  young  sir,  it  only  looked  so,  but 
was  not.  But  here  I  must  make  a  confession. 
I  saw  everything  with  my  own  eyes,  sir,  for  I  was 
her  friend  and  honoured  her  in  my  heart.  How 
foolish  I  was,  I  will  also  confess.  We  of  the 
old  school,  who  were  brought  up  at  the  end  of 
the  age  of  chivalry,  had  learnt  to  see  in  woman 
a  creature  above  the  ordinary  level  of  humanity ; 
we  revered  the  outward  part,  and  that  which 
was  beautiful  and  useless;  in  our  ideas  that 
which  pleased  the  eye  took  the  first  place.  You 
can  well  imagine  that  I,  though  a  seeker  of  the 
truth,  was  so  misled  by  these  old  ideas,  that  I 
thought  she  was  sinking  just  when  she  showed 
the  greatest  energy  and  courage.  Yes,  on  the 
very  day  that  the  decree  of  separation  came, 
I  had  a  conversation  with  her  which  I  can 
remember  as  clearly  as  though  I  had  written  it 
down.  I  said  :  '  If  you  knew  how  idolatrously 
high  you  once  stood  in  my  sight.  And  I  saw  the 
angel  let  her  white  wings  fall,  I  saw  the  fairy  lose 
her  golden  shoe.  I  saw  you  the  morning  after 
the  marriage  when  you  rode  on  your  white  horse 
through  the  wood,  it  carried  you  so  lightly  over 
the  damp  grass  and  lifted  you  so  high  over  the 
mud  of  the  marsh  without  a  spot  coming  on 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    237 

your  silver-bright  clothing.  For  a  moment  I 
thought  as  I  stood  behind  a  tree;  "  Suppose  she 
fell !  '  and  my  thought  turned  into  a  vision. 
I  saw  you  sink  in  the  mire;  the  black  water 
spirited  over  you;  your  yellow  hair  lay  like  sun- 
shine over  the  white  blossoms  of  the  bog  of 
myrtle;  you  sank  and  sank  till  I  only  saw  your 
little  hand;  then  I  heard  a  falcon  scream  up  in 
the  air  and  mount  up  on  its  wings  till  it  was  lost 
in  the  clouds.'  But  then  she  answered  me  so 
well.  '  You  said  once  long  ago  that  reality  with 
all  its  dirt  and  sordidness  was  given  us  by  God, 
and  that  we  should  not  curse  it,  but  take  it  as 
it  is.  Very  well !  But  now  you  hint  that  I  have 
sunk  because  I  am  on  the  way  to  reconcile  my- 
self with  this  life ;  I  have  changed  the  garment  of 
the  rich  for  that  of  the  poor,  since  I  am  poor; 
I  lost  my  youth  when  I  obeyed  the  law  of  nature 
and  became  a  mother ;  the  beauty  of  my  hands  is 
spoilt  by  sewing,  my  eyes  are  dim  with  care,  the 
burden  of  life  presses  me  to  the  earth  but  my 
soul  mounts — mounts  like  the  falcon  towards  the 
sky  and  freedom,  while  my  earthly  body  sinks 
in  the  mud  amid  evil-smelling  weeds.' 

"  Then  I  asked  if  she  really  believed  she  could 
keep  the  soul  above  while  the  body  sank,  and 
she  answered  '  No  !  '  This  was  because  she,  like 
myself,  had  the  delusion  that  something  sank. 


The  body,  however,  did  not  sink  through  work; 
on  the  contrary,  it  was  hardened  and  streng- 
thened; it  improved  and  mounted  but  did  not 
sink.  However,  we  were  both  so  foolish  that  we 
both  imagined  it  did,  having  been  indoctrinated 
with  this  view  from  our  youth  upwards.  We 
considered  white  hands,  though  they  might  be 
weak  and  sickly  as  more  beautiful  than  those 
which  were  hardened  and  embrowned  by  toil. 
So  perverse  were  people's  ideas  in  my  youth, 
sir,  and  so  they  are  still,  here  and  there.  But 
in  my  perversity  I  went  farther  and  advised  her 
to  commit  a  crime  '  Loose  the  falcon  and  let  it 
mount,  I  said.' 

"'I  have  already  thought  of  that,'  she 
answered,  understanding  my  thought,  '  but  the 
chain  is  strong.' 

"  '  I  have  the  key  to  it,'  I  replied. 
'  She  asked  me  to  give  it  her,  and  received 
from  me  a  bottle  of  poison. 

"  Now  I  return  to  the  story  where  I  left  it  off. 
It  was  where  she  had  left  her  husband's  room 
to  seek  the  bailiff  in  the  upper  story.  When  she 
came  there  she  had  to  wait,  for  the  bailiff  had 
visitors.  She  also  received  a  lesson,  for  none 
of  her  married  friends  would  greet  her,  because 
she  had  dissolved  her  marriage.  One  of  these 
friends  had  been  unfaithful  to  her  husband  and 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    239 

had  a  lover  but  she  thought  herself  too  good  to 
take  Frau  Margit's  hand.  What  is  one  to  say  to 
that?  At  that  time  it  was  considered  one  of  the 
greatest  crimes  to  dissolve  a  marriage,  but  now, 
thank  Heaven !  our  ideas  have  changed.  She 
came,  as  I  have  said,  to  the  bailiff  to  ask  his 
advice  as  she  had  done  all  the  time  when  diffi- 
culties arose. 

"Did  she  love  him?  Probably  not;  but  the 
heart  is  never  so  likely  to  deceive  itself  as  in  such 
cases.  She  imagined  that  she  did,  because  she 
thought  she  had  lost  her  husband  and  by  birth 
and  upbringing  she  was  not  adapted  to  stand 
alone. 

' '  But  the  bailiff  was  another  sort  of  man.  He 
was  like  one  of  those  birds  with  a  seraglio  which 
I  spoke  of,  and  if  he  had  not  been  so  cowardly, 
he  would  have  already  enticed  the  Knight's  wife. 
But  he  did  not  do  it,  for  he  saw  that  this  fruit 
would  drop  when  it  was  ripe  enough.  Therefore 
he  waited.  But  he  had  another  characteristic; 
he  was  as  vain  as  a  cock  in  a  hen-house,  and 
thought  that  he  was  a  terrible  fellow  whom  no 
woman  could  resist.  So  when  he  overheard  Frau 
Margit  say  that  she  intended  visiting  him  in  his 
room,  he  believed  that  the  time  had  come,  and 
made  elaborate  preparations  to  receive  her. 
She  came  quite  unsuspiciously,  for  she  trusted 


240    FAIR  HAVEN  AND   FOUL    STRAND 

his  friendship  and  devotion  to  her  interests. 
She  wished  to  speak  of  the  serious  prospect  which 
lay  before  her ;  he  spoke  of  his  love  and  she  did 
not  wish  to  listen.  She  was  legally  free  but  still 
felt  herself  bound.  The  might  of  memory  held 
her  and  perhaps  the  old  love  had  a  word  to  say 
in  the  matter.  The  bailiff  became  bolder  and 
begged  for  her  love  on  his  knees.  Then  she 
despised  him.  His  vanity  was  wounded,  he  for- 
got himself,  threw  the  mask  aside,  and  wished 
to  use  force.  I  came  accidentally  there  and 
was  able  to  give  him  the  coup  de  grace  by  tell- 
ing Frau  Margit  that  he  was  engaged  to  be 
married.  There  was  nothing  left  for  him  but  to 
withdraw. 

'  But  she  had  already,  when  her  last  hope 
collapsed  and  her  last  dream  vanished,  used  the 
key  to  open  the  gate  of  eternity ;  I  who  knew  that 
the  poison  required  an  hour  to  produce  its  effect, 
used  the  opportunity  to  speak  to  her,  as  one 
speaks  to  the  dying.  Ah !  certainly  the  love  of 
mortals  for  this  wretched  life  is  great,  and  at 
such  moments  the  human  soul  is  turned  upside 
down ;  what  lies  at  the  bottom  comes  uppermost, 
old  memories  revive;  old  beliefs,  however 
absurd  and  however  rightly  they  may  have  been 
rejected,  arise  again,  and  I  woke  up  in  her  the 
old  ideas  of  duty,  foolish  perhaps,  but  necessary 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    241 

now.  I  brought  her  so  far  that  she  wished  to 
live  and  commence  again  a  life  of  renunciation 
and  reflection  in  the  convent.  But  since  the 
convent  no  longer  existed  I  persuaded  her  to  be 
willing  to  exchange  it  for  the  imprisonment  of 
home,  where  there  is  plenty  of  opportunity  for 
penance  in  mutual  self-denial,  for  devotion  in 
the  fulfilment  of  duties  and  in  obedience.  She 
fought  against  her  pride  and  regretted  her 
surrender,  she  raged  against  life,  which  had 
deceived  her,  and  against  men  who  had  lied  and 
said  that  life  was  a  pleasure-garden.  In  this 
matter  I  agreed  with  her,  for  the  unhappiness  in 
most  marriages  arises  from  the  fact  that  people 
persuade  the  married  pair  that  they  will  find 
absolute  happiness  in  marriage,  whereas  happi- 
ness is  not  to  be  found  in  life  at  all. 

'  She  was  frantic,  but  an  accident  came  to  my 
aid.  Her  child,  whose  room  was  underneath  us, 
began  to  cry.  She  was  shaken  to  her  depths, 
and  said  that  she  was  willing  to  live  for  her 
child's  sake,  in  order  to  teach  it  that  life  is 
not  what  people  describe  it  to  be.  She  did  not 
wish  to  leave  it  to  the  same  fate  which  she  had 
escaped.  She  did  not  speak  of  her  husband; 
whether  she  thought  of  him  or  not,  I  cannot  say. 
I  who  had  given  her  the  poison,  knew  where 
the  antidote  was;  but  as  I  still  wished  to  keep 


242    FAIR   HAVEN   AND    FOUL    STRAND 

her  in  fear,  I  gave  her  less  hope  than  I  myself 
possessed. 

"  I  went  away,  and  when  I  returned,  I  found 
her  in  her  husband's  arms.  He  had  found  her  on 
the  stairs,  where  she  had  fallen  down  in  a  swoon. 
All  was  forgiven  and  all  was  forgotten.  You 
think  that  strange?  But  have  you  not  forgiven 
your  mother  although  she  chastised  you,  and 
does  not  your  mother  love  you,  although  you 
have  deceived  her,  and  caused  her  grief  and 
anxiety.  This  last  agitation  had  convulsed  her 
soul  so  that  the  old  love  lay  uppermost  like  a 
clear  pearl,  which  has  been  fished  up  from  the 
miry  bottom  of  the  sea  where  it  lay  hidden  in  a 
dirty  mollusc.  But  she  still  struggled  with  her 
pride  and  said  she  would  not  love  him,  although 
she  did  love  him.  I  never  forget  his  answer, 
which  contains  the  whole  riddle,  '  You  did  not 
wish  to  love  me,  Margit/  he  said,  '  for  your  pride 
forbade  it,  but  you  love  me  still.  You  love  me, 
although  I  raised  my  hand  against  you,  and 
although  I  was  shamefully  cowardly  when  the 
trouble  came.  I  wished  to  hate  you  when  you 
left  me ;  I  wished  to  kill  you,  because  you  were 
willing  to  sacrifice  your  child,  and  still  I  love  you. 
Do  you  not  now  believe  in  the  power  of  love  over 
our  evil  wills  ?  ' 

' '  So  he  said ;  and  I  say  now  like  the  fabulist : 


FAIR    HAVEN    AND    FOUL    STRAND    243 

this  fable  teaches  that  love  is  a  great  power  which 
passes  all  understanding  and  against  which  our 
wills  can  do  nothing.  Love  bears  all  things, 
gives  up  all  things,  and  of  faith,  hope,  and  love, 
sir,  love  is  the  greatest." 

'  Well,   how  did  they  go  on  afterwards  ? ' ' 
asked  the  Count. 

'  I  was  no  longer  with  them." 
'They  probably  continued  to  quarrel." 
'  *  I  know  that  they  have  disagreements  some- 
times, for  these  must  happen  when  there  are 
different  opinions,  but  I  know  also  that  neither 
wishes  to  domineer  over  the  other.     They  go 

./     o 

their  way,  making  less  demands  on  life  than 
before  and  therefore  they  are  as  happy  as  one 
can  be  when  one  takes  life  as  it  is.  That  was 
what  the  old  period  with  its  claim  of  being  able 
to  make  a  heaven  on  earth  could  not  do,  but  what 
the  new  period  has  learnt. 


THE  END 


THE   NORTHUMBERLAND   FRESS,   THORNTON  STRICT,   NBWCASTI.K-UPON-TVNB 


UC  SOUTHERN  REGIONAL JJBRARY  F 


A     000  048  222     4 


